Infinity
by EpicLoVe111
Summary: It's the 10th anniversary of Lilly's death and Logan finally gets the courage to visit her grave for the 1st time since she died. Will a talk with Lilly make him realize how much he needs Veronica? Veronica has returned home because of her dad's illness. She needs Logan now more than ever. Will she open her heart? First couple chapters are AU. Rated T for now, maybe M later.
1. A Heavenly Talk pt 1

**Hey! So I had been thinking about this for a couple days and it just came to me. I'm sure there are similar stories. I know there are ones on the 10th anniversary of Lilly's death but I'm hoping this is a little bit different than them. A word of warning: I'm a HUGE believer in angels. My regular story I'm writing that's not a fan fiction is on angels. For those who are reading my other story, Sinful, I'm hoping to get the next chapter out as soon as I can. Read and review please. I'd love to know what you think.**

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Ten years. It had been 10 years since Lilly Kane was brutally murdered. Ten years since Logan Echolls set foot in the Neptune Memorial Cemetery. He wasn't proud of the fact that he hadn't visited her. He knew he should have. If anything at least on her birthday. It had just been too hard. Even after 10 years, he still felt a lot of guilt.

For the past 9 years, Logan mourned in private. He lit a candle and said a prayer on three specific days a year: Lilly's birthday, their anniversary, and the day that Lilly died. Logan had never been overly religious but on those 3 days he was.

The weather had cooperated which Logan was thankful for. It was 80 degrees and partly cloudy but at least it wasn't raining. Lilly had been buried in a desolate area of the cemetery. It was on a huge hill surrounded by a few trees. The whole hill had been reserved though for the Kane family. Granted Lilly's parents and Duncan were still alive but they had reserved the area around her.

"Way to be prepared." Logan commented as he past her parents' headstone.

It wasn't hard to find Lilly's; it was a moderate sized black granite headstone with Lillian Elizabeth Kane engraved in gold on it. There was a picture of a lily engraved in the bottom right hand corner. He glanced down at it and sighed. The time had went slow but then again it had went by incredibly fast.

He wasn't sure whether or not he should dress for this visit but decided against going formal. He still wore a navy polo shirt and dark jeans. He had kept his hair dark instead of getting it frosted blonde and now he was sporting a neatly trimmed goatee.

On his way to the cemetery he went and bought a dozen red roses from a floral boutique. He knew lilies might be more…appropriate but he had always given her roses. She always told him how much she loved them.

He looked down at her headstone and gently set the bouquet of roses down in front of it. "Hey, Lilly." He said quietly as he look around to see if anyone could hear him. There was no one around though. "It's…umm Logan. You probably know that."

"Of course I know that. It's about time you showed up." A voice from behind him said.

Logan froze. It's not possible, right? I mean, there was no possible way this could happen, right? He slowly turned around and saw a glowing Lilly standing there. Here straight blonde hair was now to her shoulders and she was dressed in a white blouse and pink skirt.

"Lilly?" He asked.

"Yes, Logan it's me." Lilly smirked at him.

"Is this real?" He raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"I don't know; is it?" Her eyes twinkled. "Yes, I'm here."

Logan sank into the grass. "It's so good to see you, Lil."

"Yeah, you too Logan. Although…" Her voice drifted off.

Logan's eyebrows furrowed. "What?"

"You look stupid with that goatee."

Logan busted out laughing as his fingers ran across it. "Well, too bad. I like it."

Lilly shrugged. "Well, I guess as long as you like it. So you want to explain to me why I haven't gotten a visit from you in the last 10 years?"

His fingers plucked the grass beside him. "I don't know. Been kind of scared to."

"Why?" Lilly sat next to him.

"Because I remember the day you were murdered and I remember how we weren't speaking. I blamed myself for the longest time for not being able to save you that day."

"Logan, you couldn't have saved me."

"Of course I could have." Logan argued. "Anyway, I haven't been brave enough to try this until now because of that."

"Well, I'm glad to have another visitor. I don't get too many of them." She revealed.

"I'm sorry about that." He told her sadly. "What about your parents? Don't they visit regularly?"

"Get real." Lilly scoffed. "My dad is still detached from the situation and my mom can't stop thinking about herself long enough to come see me. I see them once a year if that."

Logan felt so bad for her.

"No, there's only 1 person who regularly visits, Logan and she'll be showing up here any time now."

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Veronica?"

Lilly nodded. "She's here every year on this day and she visits every trip she's in town." She revealed.

"Wait, she visits you every time she's in town? How often is that?"

Lilly shrugged. "Like 6, 8 times a year?" She ventured a guess.

"She visits you 8 times a year and I haven't seen her in 7 years. How screwed up is that?"

"Well, have you tried to do anything to change that?" Lilly raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

Logan remained quiet.

"Yeah, you don't deserve the visits."

"And you do?"

"Excuse me! I'm dead!" Lilly exclaimed. "Yes, I do considering no one else bothers to visit me."

"Yes, I know. I'm a horrible ex-boyfriend for not visiting you sooner. I just can't believe I didn't know."

"Never too late to change things between you, Logan." Lilly advised him.

"Yeah, it is." Logan nodded. "She lives across the country, Lil."

"Not anymore."

Logan's eyes grew wide. "What?"

"Yeah, she's moved back to Neptune."

"Why?"

"Do you really need a reason?"

"I would prefer it, yes."

"Well, her dad has had some health problems and she's moved home to run the business and take care of him."

"What kind of health problems?"

"He…has non-Hodgkin's lymphoma."

Logan's eyes grew wide. "Wait, isn't that like…"

"Cancer?" Lilly filled in. "Yeah, it is. He's at stage 3." She sighed. "Things aren't looking good for him either."

"Are you looking into the future to see that?"

She shook her head. "No, I don't have that ability unfortunately. If I had to guess though I don't think he's going to make it."

"Well, aren't you just the angel of death?" Logan joked and Lilly gave him a knowing smile.

"I'm only saying that because Keith has been battling this for awhile…"

"How long is awhile?"

"A few years. He just told Veronica last year though."

"Seriously? He kept this from her?"

Lilly shrugged. "He didn't want to worry her. He thought they'd be able to beat it. They had caught it relatively early but none of the treatments have been working for him and there have been several treatments. When Veronica heard the cancer had advanced, she quit her job and came home. It's been 6 weeks now."

"I'm actually surprised she didn't try to move home sooner."

"She did…Keith told her no. When she found out about this now, she told her dad she wasn't taking no for an answer. This time, Keith didn't fight her."

Logan sat there, stunned. God, he wished he had known.

"She's been praying to me a lot to see about helping him. I really wish I could." Lilly told him. "She needs someone to lean on through this. She needs someone to help her. She needs you, Logan."

"I don't think so, Lil." Logan sighed. "She hasn't tried to contact me at all. It may have been 7 years ago but I don't think she's forgiven me for what happened with Madison."

"Madison." Lilly repeated in disgust. "What the hell is wrong with you, Logan? How could you sleep with Madison Sinclair?"

"I was drunk!" Logan snapped loudly. "I was heartbroken. I wasn't thinking."

"Damn right you weren't thinking." Lily retorted.

"Hey! I don't need judgment from you, OK?"

"Well, someone needs to say this. Logan, Madison Sinclair is a slut, OK? Out of all the girls you could have possibly slept with, you chose the one that is Veronica's arch nemesis. Quite frankly she was an arch nemesis of mine too when I was alive."

"Two things: 1) Why was she an arch nemesis of yours and 2) I'm not going to argue with the fact that she's a slut."

"Why she's an arch nemesis of mine is not important. The point is, you picked the one girl that really bothers Veronica. You were an idiot for doing that."

"Excuse me but you never were a saint you know? We weren't even broken up but that didn't stop you from sleeping with Weevil and my dad. You have no right to judge."

"True. Remember something Logan I never claimed I was going to be faithful."

"That's right; you sure as hell didn't."

"Look enough about our past. It is what it is. That's not the one you need to focus on. You need to focus on you and Veronica. Things can still be fixed between you."

"And how can you be so sure?"

"Because your love story is epic."

Logan cracked a smile.

"Too bad you don't remember that speech."

"I vaguely do."

"You do have an epic love story. I will tell you that Veronica hasn't forgotten it. She's hesitating but she does want to see you."

"Oh yeah? When?"

"How about now?"

"Logan?" A voice called from midway up the hill. He looked over and saw Veronica standing there.

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**OK so next chapter is not written but it's going to be Logan and Veronica talking but it will mainly be a conversation between Lilly and Veronica. Like I said, HUGE believer in angels. Also about Veronica's dad being sick. Non Hodgkin's lymphoma is what my brother in law had. He got diagnosed with it about 7 years ago. He was lucky; they caught it in stage 1. They found it by a fluke. He's been in remission for 6 years. Anyway, I love reading reviews so please do, OK? **


	2. A Heavenly Talk pt 2

**Hey! So thanks for the reviews! I haven't responded to any of them yet but I do appreciate them. I'm glad people are liking this story. I wanted to get this chapter out before I headed to my sister's house for the 4th of July. I'll be there thru Thursday. Read and review please!  
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"Logan?" Logan slowly turned around and midway up the hill stood Veronica. She hadn't changed much over the years. Her hair was slightly wavy and just below her shoulders. She was wearing a teal top with a black skirt and black dress sandals.

"Hey Veronica." He gave her a knowing smile.

"Oh my god." She climbed up the rest of the hill and Logan stood up. She stood in front of him awkwardly. Neither was sure what to do until Logan brought her in for a hug. It wasn't the easiest however considering Veronica had her purse on one shoulder and a bouquet of pink calla lilies in the other hand.

"How are you?" He asked.

Veronica sighed as she pulled away and set the bouquet down beside his roses. "How much time do you have?" She joked.

"Infinity." Logan told her in all seriousness.

Veronica smiled. "So what are you doing here?"

"Same thing you are."

Veronica's eyes welled up with tears. "I can't believe it's been 10 years."

Logan looked down at Lilly's headstone. "I know." He very casually decided to ask, "So how long are you back for?"

"Infinity." She decided to use his word.

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow. "You're moving back?"

"Actually, I already did." Veronica started to fidget. "A little over a month ago."

"Wow! Thanks for letting me know." Logan teased her.

Veronica sighed. "Logan, I had every intention of letting you know but there's just been a lot going on. That sounds like an excuse but it's the honest to God truth."

Logan knew it was. "It's OK, Veronica. I understand." And he did. It couldn't be easy for her.

"I really would like to talk to you." Veronica glanced around. "Just not here."

"Sure. How about you call me when you would like to get together?"

"OK." Veronica nodded. "Is your number still the same?"

Logan nodded. "Yeah, it is."

Veronica paused for a moment then opened her purse and dug around inside. Logan held in a grin. She found a small piece of paper and a pen and she jotted down her number for him. "Here's mine so you can call me if you want to." A little presumptuous, Veronica realized but she figured he would be asking for it.

"Great. Thanks." He folded it up and put it in his pants pocket.

Veronica smiled.

"I should get going." He smiled at her. "I'll talk to you soon, OK?"

"OK." She nodded. "Bye Logan."

"Bye Veronica."

Veronica sighed as she sank into the grass and watched him walk away. When he was at the bottom of the hill, he glanced back up at her. She gave him a small smile and a quick wave. He did the same then hopped into his Range Rover and took off.

That was hard, Veronica realized. She knew it was going to be. It had been 7 years after all and they weren't on the greatest terms when she left. She had a lot of time to make up for.

"Ahh…the awkward but inevitable meeting." Lilly murmured.

"If I didn't know better I'd say you played a part in it." Veronica told her without turning around to face her.

"Come on, Veronica Mars." Lilly chirped. "You knew it was going to happen. You've moved back home. You were bound to run into him."

"I know." She nodded. "It's just so hard."

"You're making it hard. You both are. I don't know who's worse." Lilly sighed.

"How am I making it worse?"

"Because you're living in the past."

"I am not!" Veronica argued.

"Oh yeah?" Lilly raised an eyebrow. "Have you forgiven him for sleeping with Madison?"

Veronica stayed mum.

"Veronica, it's been 7 years. It's time to move past it. You can't live in the past. You weren't even together when it happened."

"That doesn't mean that it still doesn't hurt, Lil."

"I know it does but honestly, he wouldn't have slept with her if you were together. Veronica, Logan is a serial monogamist. He commits to one woman and only 1 woman at a time."

OK so that was true.

"It was a drunken mistake."

"I know it was." Veronica quietly told her.

"He's been waiting for you to come back." Lilly revealed and Veronica's eyes grew wide.

"He has?"

"Of course he has." She confirmed. "He's so in love with you, Veronica."

Veronica glanced over at her.

"And I know you love him. Maybe now you'll actually be able to say the words to him."

Veronica's mouth dropped open. "I've told him I loved him before, Lilly."

"No you haven't." Lilly insisted. "There's a difference between him saying, 'Do you love me?' and you responding with 'Yes' and you actually saying the words, 'I love you'. You need to quit being so damn afraid. Open up your heart, Veronica Mars. It's time."

"OK, I'll consider it." Veronica concluded.

Lilly shrugged. "Well, that's something, I guess."

"There's just so much going on right now with my dad, Lilly. He's my main priority right now."

"And that's understandable but Veronica you're not a superhero so you should stop trying to be one. It's OK to be vulnerable. It's OK to ask for help. It's OK to lean on someone when you need it."

"I've got someone." Veronica insisted. "I have you."

"I was talking about someone who was living and breathing." Lilly replied dryly. "Besides, I can only help so much but what you're asking for…I don't have the ability to do that unfortunately."

Veronica gave her a sad smile and nodded.

"I'd love to help you but what you're wanting…it's only something that God can help you with."

Veronica sighed. That was so not the answer she was hoping for.

"Veronica, consider leaning on Logan, OK? He's helped you before with what happened when you were almost raped."

"And also saving me from that pseudo kidnapping with the ATF agent." Veronica added.

"He's good at these things. Besides, he's more than willing to help you." Lilly concluded.

Veronica raised an inquisitive eyebrow. "And you know this how?"

"It's a gift being an ex-girlfriend."

Veronica glanced over at Lilly who was sitting beside her. "We've talked about him but I've never asked you. I had no reason to until now."

"What's that?"

"Does it bother you?"

"You and Logan?"

Veronica nodded.

"Of course not. I always knew you two would end up together."

"You did?"

"I did. I saw the way he looked at you, Veronica. It was so blatantly obvious."

"And you made the comment about him being a serial monogamist?"

"Oh, I know he really wouldn't have cheated. That doesn't mean though that if we wouldn't have been broken up that he wouldn't have made a play for you then. It was pretty obvious."

"Obvious to everyone except me." Veronica retorted.

"You were too blissed out with my brother to notice." Lilly told her.

"Did Duncan know?"

"If he did, he didn't say anything and that's not Duncan."

Just then, Veronica's phone started to buzz. It was her dad. She picked up on the 2nd ring.

"Hey dad." She paused while she listened to him talk. "Umm…yeah not a problem. Has it been called in already? OK, yeah I'll pick it up on the way home. I just came up to the cemetery to visit Lilly." She paused again. "I'll be heading that way shortly. I'll see you in a little bit. Love you too, Dad. Bye." She hung up and glanced over at Lilly. "He wants me to pick up a prescription for him."

Lilly nodded. "Yeah you should probably get going."

"I'll be back soon."

Lilly gave her a knowing smile. "I know you will."

Veronica smiled. "I love you, Lilly Kane."

"I love you too Veronica Mars. Now go say those words to Logan."

Veronica cracked a smile as she headed down the hill. If only it were that easy. As soon as she got in her car, she glanced down at her phone. Was it too soon to call him? Veronica laughed that notion off and thought, since when has that ever stopped me?

She quickly punched in his number and waited through 4 rings but he didn't pick up. She almost hung up then heard:

_"Hey it's Logan with today's inspirational message: Forgiveness means letting go of the past-Gerald Jampolsky. Please leave a message."_

Veronica remained frozen for a moment. Was that message aimed at her? Then she realized that the phone had beeped and there was dead silence. "Hey, hi it's me, Veronica. I'm sure you already know that though. I was glad to see you today. I was a little surprised but it was nice." She paused for a second. "Was that message aimed at me? Did you change it after you saw me? Am I being paranoid? I must be. I'm starting to ramble. Umm…give me a call when you get time and we can see about getting together sometime and catch up. OK. Bye."

Logan had been in the shower when Veronica called. He noticed she had left a message and listened to it. When he heard dead air, he almost thought she didn't leave a message. But then he heard her talk…well, ramble. He had to smirk at the fact that she thought the message about her. Truthfully, he did have that message on before he saw her but there was a lot of truth in it about them. He got out his cell phone and punched in the phone number he gave her.

Veronica was surprised how quickly Logan called her back. The only reason it took her three rings to answer was because her phone was at the bottom of her purse.

"Hello?"

"Veronica?"

"Oh hey Logan. Sorry I was trying to find my phone."

"Not a problem. So did you want to meet for a drink tonight?"

"Umm…sure. Around 7:30?"

"Sounds good. Where did you want to meet?"

"Doesn't matter to me."

"Neptune Grand Bar?"

"Still living at the Neptune Grand?"

"No, I have my own condo now. You can come here if you want."

"Where's it at?"

"Where do you think?"

"The 09er zip?"

"Of course."

Some things never change. "Umm…not tonight. I should stay relatively close to the apartment."

"Why's that?" He asked even though he knew the answer.

"Because of my dad. I'll explain tonight. Neptune Grand Bar is fine."

"So 7:30?""

"Sounds good."

"See you then."

"Bye, Logan." Veronica hung up the phone and sighed. She hoped this wasn't going to be a bad experience.

Veronica arrived home at 4 o'clock. Her dad was on the couch dressed in sweats with Backup beside him.

"Hey buddy." She scratched Backup's head and handed her dad his prescription. "Here you go, dad."

"Thanks sweetheart. I appreciate it."

Veronica took a seat beside the couch. "It's not a problem."

"So did you have a good visit with Lilly?"

He didn't know about the conversations Lilly and Veronica had; just on a general level that she would go visit Lilly's grave and tell her what's going on.

"It was good and surprising. Very, very surprising."

Her dad frowned. "Why's that?"

Veronica cleared her throat. "Well, when I got there, I found Logan was at her grave."

He raised an eyebrow. "Really? Logan was there?"

She nodded.

"When was the last time you talked to him?"

"Seven years ago."

"I bet that was…"

"Awkward." Veronica filled in.

"Yeah. So was he happy to see you?"

She sighed. "I'd like to believe so. We're umm…going to have drinks tonight and catch up." She rose from her seat.

"Really? Are you sure you want to do that?"

"I can't run away anymore." She told him as she headed back to her bedroom.

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**OK so next chapter will be Logan and Veronica talking. How much tension should there be? Some? A lot? Let me know what you think. Oh that saying? I went to a website and started going thru quotes and I got 40 of them. I thought this one would kind of get to Veronica the most. Anyway I hope everyone has a good 4th of July!**


	3. Fantasy vs Reality

**OK sorry it took so long. It's a longer chapter though. It took some thought as to how I wanted this to go. Please review and let me know what you thought.**

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Veronica stood in front of her full length mirror and examined the dress she was wearing. It was a silver, sleeveless sequin cowl-neck Ralph Lauren dress. She had bought it while she was still in Virginia and worn it for a work function. She had stayed with the FBI after her internship was over. Did she like the job? Yeah. Had she really been happy? No. In fact, most of the time, she had been miserable. She put up a good front and tried to make sure that her personal life did not interfere with the job. But she was so far away from her friends and family…and Logan. She had desperately missed Logan. But the thing was, with the way things were before she left, she wasn't sure he would say the same.

She had been looking for an excuse to come home. It was really sad that it took something like her dad getting cancer for it to happen though. She had really wanted to come home as soon as she heard but he told her not to worry; he was doing fine. He was doing treatments and things were going good. The truth came a little later though and Veronica found out how things really were. The fact was she had stayed mad at her dad for a good week. In the end, though, she couldn't stay mad more than that.

She did a once over on her reflection in the mirror. The dress hit right at her knees and she kept her makeup on the minimal side. Her hair was in loose waves. She slipped on her silver heels and grabbed her purse from her bed.

As she headed past her dad's room, he called to her. He had moved into his bedroom and was sitting up in bed watching TV.

"Wow!" He commented. "You look great."

Veronica blushed. "Oh, thanks. I shouldn't be too late."

"Veronica, you're over 21. Hell, you're over 25."

"I know but if you need me…"

"Honey, I'll be fine. Enjoy your time with Logan. Do some catching up."

"I will." She smiled. "Thanks dad. I'll see you later."

It was only a 10 minute drive to the Neptune Grand. She walked in and glanced around nervously. Her stomach was doing flip-flops. Logan wasn't there yet. She glanced down at her watch. Well, she was a few minutes early. She scanned the bar; it hadn't really changed since the last time she was there. There were less than two handfuls of people scattered throughout the medium sized room. She decided to pick the booth in the corner. It was the most secluded. The bartender came over a minute later to take her drink order. She decided to have a vodka martini.

Logan was only a few minutes late. Truthfully he had to stop at every stoplight between his condo and the hotel and it had pissed him off. Now the younger Logan wouldn't have even given it a second thought and would have run the stoplights. But after getting pulled over when he was 21 for not only running a stoplight but doing 75 in a 40 cost him over $250 bucks.

It didn't take him long to spot her. It also didn't take him long to tell she was nervous. Her eyes kept darting around the room. When he reached the table, he noticed that her martini was already half gone. He smiled at her.

"Thirsty?" He raised a curious eyebrow.

Veronica gave a sheepish grin. "That's one word for it." She mused.

The bartender came back and Logan ordered a beer.

"You look great." He told her as he sat down and gave her a kiss on her cheek.

Veronica was a little surprised by the gesture. "Oh, thanks. So do you."

Logan smiled. It had been really great to see her. Honestly, he was just as nervous as she was.

"So…umm…how have you been?" Veronica asked as she sipped her martini.

Logan shrugged. "Can't complain. My company's been doing really well and I have 150 people working for me."

Veronica's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really? That's great."

"Yeah, it is. Mac is the head over the IT area and actually Dick joined the company a few months ago." The bartender delivered his beer.

"Hopefully doing nothing too strenuous." She joked but Logan didn't laugh.

"Actually Dick's changed, Veronica. You might just be amazed to know that he takes his job pretty seriously."

"Sorry. I didn't mean it to be mean. I'm sure he does."

"Being married to Mac has made him grow up. You should see them together."

"Actually I have." Veronica revealed.

Logan frowned. "You have."

"I have." She confirmed as she drained the rest of her martini and signaled for another one.

"Since when?"

"I saw them on a few prior visits and once or twice since I've been home."

Logan was trying to contain his anger. "Veronica, why is it that Lilly got a visit from you every time you were in town and now apparently so have Mac and Dick and yet I haven't?"

"It's been too hard, Logan. As far as Mac and Dick go, I'm trying to make up for not being at their wedding. You remember that?"

Of course he did. He had been disappointed that she didn't show up. Mac and Dick understood though. She was on assignment and wasn't able to get away.

"Yes, I remember." He mumbled.

Her eyes narrowed as she replayed his question in her mind. "Wait a minute. How did you know that I went and visited Lilly every time I was home?" The bartender brought her 2nd martini.

"That's not important." Logan snapped. "The important part was the fact in all this time, I was thinking you just never came home but in reality, it was just that you weren't seeing me." He took a swig of his beer.

"That's not true; I haven't seen Wallace in that time either." She took a sip of it

"Only because he lives in Chicago." Logan accused. "Nice to know that avoidance is your new version of running away."

"It is not." Veronica spat as she stared at him. "Great. This is just great. We haven't even been here 15 minutes and we're fighting already."

"I don't want to fight."

"Well, you could have fooled me." She retorted as she took another drink of it.

"OK, let's start over." He sighed. "How are things with you?"

"I'd love to say they're great but honestly things suck."

"Care to elaborate?" He raised an eyebrow and took a swig of his beer.

"My dad is sick. Really sick."

"Sick how?"

"I think you know how."

His eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean?"

"Logan, there is only 1 person who know how often I visited Lilly and that is Lilly herself."

Logan fell quiet, unsure of what to say. Would she think he was crazy for thinking he saw Lilly? That really wasn't possible was it?

"Did you see her?"

"Well, I…"

"My guess is you've seen her too." Veronica cut him off.

Wait, did she say too? His eyes grew wide in surprise. "You've seen her?"

Veronica nodded as she drained the 2nd martini. "Seen her and have had conversations with her too."

"She answers you?"

Veronica nodded again. Logan thought for a moment then cleared his throat. "I thought I was dreaming or hallucinating or something."

"Thought I was too at first. Over time she's become my conscience."

Logan cracked a smile. "Your conscience, huh?" He polished off his beer then and signaled to the bartender for another round.

"Yeah, she's helped me a lot with issues in the past." Her eyes stared at the table in front of her. "But she can't help me save my dad." She whispered.

"So tell me what's really going on with your dad."

"She didn't tell you?" Veronica frowned.

"I'd rather hear it from you."

She sighed. "Well, dad is in stage 3 of non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Have you heard of it?"

Logan gave her a quick nod. "I have."

"He's…" Veronica's eyes started to well up. "He's hanging on. He keeps fighting but none of the drugs are working. It's a losing battle."

The bartender brought their next round.

"You can't lose hope, Veronica."

"I'm trying not to but it gets so hard. I mean, I get my hopes up with these drugs only to find out that they failed yet again."

"And what does your 'conscience' tell you to do?" Logan asked.

Veronica sighed. "She tells me to stop trying to be a superhero."

"Really?" Logan took a drink of his beer while Veronica downed 1/3 of her martini. "Are you going to listen to her?"

"I'm going to try." She cracked a smile. "So…" She swirled her martini glass around. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

"Was that message aimed at me?"

Logan smirked. "Is there any reason you should think it was aimed at you?"

"Logan…" She groaned.

"No, Veronica I had put the message actually on before I saw you."

Veronica just nodded as she took another drink. She was getting close to being done with her 3rd drink. Two things were running through Logan's mind right then: 1) Veronica was starting to act like she was drunk and 2) there was a very good chance that she was drinking on an empty stomach.

"Have you eaten anything?"

Veronica shook her head as she stared at her nearly empty martini glass.

"OK we should order something otherwise you'll be sicker than a dog tonight."

"No, I won't." She protested.

"Veronica, for once, just trust me on this."

Her blue eyes glanced up to meet his chocolate brown ones. "I do trust you." She admitted. She did actually mean that too.

Logan cracked a smile. That was nice to hear but he was pretty sure she was not going to remember saying it come tomorrow morning. He handed her one of the menus on the table and looked at another one himself. He was going to get prime rib. It had been a long time since he had ate there. Veronica decided she would get the same thing and she got another drink.

Once their order was placed, Logan excused himself to go to the bathroom. When he rounded the corner, he whipped out his cell phone and punched in a number. Three rings later, someone answered. "Hello?"

"Mr. Mars, it's Logan Echolls."

"Logan…long time, no talk to." Veronica's dad mused. "Something wrong? Is Veronica OK?"

Logan glanced from the hallway. "She's fine except she's a little tipsy."

"Oh no." Keith sighed.

"When I got here she was almost done with her 1st drink and I was no more than 3 minutes late."

"She's been nervous."

"Yeah, I know. Me too. Listen, don't expect her home tonight. I'm going to check her into a room here so she can sleep it off."

"Logan…"

"Mr. Mars, I plan on checking her in then heading home. You don't have to worry."

There was silence. "OK. I'm sure things have changed since the last time you guys were together but you can understand my concern."

"No, I do but I wouldn't try anything. We've got quite a ways to go before I would consider that. I'm hoping we'll be friends again though."

"That's good. It would be nice to see that honestly. She needs someone right now."

Logan solemnly nodded. "Well, I better get back. Veronica had just ordered another drink when I headed for the bathroom."

"OK. Thanks for the heads up, Logan. I'll see her tomorrow and Logan?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm trusting you with my daughter. Don't let me down."

"I won't. I promise." Just before he hung up, Logan said. "Mr. Mars?"

"Yes?"

"I'm really sorry to hear about the cancer. I hope things work out for you."

"Thank you, Logan. I appreciate that. Goodbye."

"Bye." Logan sighed as he headed back to the table.

"What took you so long?" Veronica looked up at him.

"Nothing. I just had to make a call real quick." He told her as he sat back down. He watched her as she swirled her martini glass around. A little bit of it spilled onto the table so she grabbed a napkin to clean it up. He reached over and grabbed her hand. Veronica was a little startled by this. She looked up to meet his gaze.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." Veronica shook her head. "Just thinking."

"Dangerous thing to do when you're drunk." Logan noted.

"I am not drunk!" She insisted and he gave her a knowing look.

"Veronica, you just had 3 drinks in an hour. It's a rarity but I have seen you drunk before."

Their food arrived and they ate quietly. They occasionally looked over at each other. The silence was beginning to get to Veronica. She finally blurted out:

"When did everything get so fucked up for us, Logan?"

Logan stared at her for a moment, surprised by her bluntness. "I've been trying to figure that out for the last 7 years, Veronica."

She nodded.

"Things just unraveled after the rapes at Hearst. Plus there was also the fact that you didn't trust me." He told her as he ate a bite of his prime rib.

"It wasn't you, Logan. I've always had a hard time trusting people. You've known that for the last 9 years." She sighed.

"And you still have problems with it?"

"I'd love to say no but yes."

"You're going to have to try to trust somebody eventually, you know."

"It's hard because everyone I've trusted lies to me." She told him sadly as she ate her prime rib.

It was now Logan's turn to ask. "Is that aimed at me?"

"That's aimed at everyone, Logan including my dad. He had been sick for a long time before he told me."

"I'm sure he was just trying to…"

"Don't make excuses for him, Logan. I wish everyone would stop trying to protect me. I'm a big girl; I can handle it."

Logan didn't say anything. He just nodded as he ate. He held in a smile. He knew that was a lie. She couldn't handle everything.

"What is with that look?" She groaned a she took a bite out of her baked potato.

"Nothing." He told her.

"Come on, Logan. Let's hear the rebuttal. I know you want to."

"Fine. Let's say…" He took a drink of his beer, "I had told you it was Madison I slept with when you asked. Would that have made a difference if I had been completely honest with you?"

Veronica opened her mouth then quickly closed it. Logan smirked.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. I rest my case. People hide things to protect you, Veronica. You have high expectations of everyone, especially me. It is very hard to live up to it." He admitted and she got quiet. "I'm not saying that to be mean but that's why it's sometimes hard to tell you everything. I'd love to erase that night in Aspen with her. Hell, I'd love to erase that whole damn winter break considering I spent most of it drunk. I don't remember huge chunks of time there and the ones I do are still fuzzy." He polished off his beer. Thankfully Veronica really hadn't touched her 4th drink yet.

"Just answer me one thing." Veronica said quietly as she ate her food.

Logan sighed. Please don't let this lead to a screaming match he silently pleaded. "OK."

"Why her? Out of all the people you could have possibly slept with, why the one you knew would piss me off the most? Did you do it to get back at me?"

He let out a heavy sigh this time. "Veronica, I told you this before and I swear to God I meant it then and I mean it now…it honestly had nothing to do with you. I was so drunk I couldn't see straight. You know what a manipulative bitch she is, Veronica. I was drunk and lonely and depressed over my breakup with you and she used it to her advantage."

Veronica nodded as she took a big drink of her martini.

"OK." Logan signaled for another beer. "I answered your question and now I would like you to answer mine."

"OK." She finished drink #4 and Logan groaned internally.

"Can we move past this now? Please?"

She stared at him for a few moments. "Part of me knows I have no valid reason to be mad at you because we weren't even together when it happened."

Logan sat quietly and listened.

"I want nothing more than to move past this but with everything that happened with us in the past…"

"Forget the past." Logan told her.

"I don't want to forget the past!" She huffed which caused him to frown. "If we forget the past, we erase the good memories too and I don't want that." She explained as her eyes were kept on her plate.

OK so that was a good point. "So where are we then?"

"And you think I'm drunk." Veronica retorted.

Logan groaned. "I didn't mean the physical location, Veronica. I meant where are we?"

She gazed up at him. She thought for a moment. "Friends, I guess."

"You guess?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Well, yeah. Right now we're starting as fresh as we can given the past and friends would be a good place to start." She decided.

"OK." He nodded.

Veronica frowned at his expression. It was somewhat unreadable. "Something wrong with that?"

"No, not at all."

"Because if you were thinking more than that…"

He cut her off. "I wasn't." He waited for a second then added. "You're right. We need to start as friends and go from there."

She nodded. "We need to go slow."

"Going slow will benefit both of us."

"How do you figure?"

"Well, for you, it will show you that you can trust me and for me, it will show how you're not going to run away any time a situation gets too hard."

"I do not…"

"Yes, you do." He insisted. "Every time. Should I list a few? I was stranded on my dad's boat. I came back to an empty pool house at my fake birthday party. Prom night was another one and that's just high school. Want me to go on?"

"I have no intention of running away anymore, Logan." She confirmed.

"OF course you won't. The main reason for that is your dad."

"Why does it matter? The point is I'm staying." Veronica insisted then sighed. "Besides the conclusion I've learned the hard way is that running away doesn't solve anything."

"Really? You just learned that?"

"I said learned the hard way. I've known it for quite awhile." She signaled for another drink.

"Veronica, why don't you slow down on the drinks, huh?"

"Why? You already called my dad and told him not to expect me home didn't you?"

He stared in disbelief at her which caused her to smirk.

"How did you know that?"

"You just told me." She smiled sweetly at him. "I'm not stupid though. I knew when you went to the bathroom, that's more than likely what you were really doing."

By the time 10 o'clock rolled around, Veronica had finished 6 drinks and Logan had finished 4 respectively. He had paced himself better than her. He was pretty sure he would be able to drive but as soon as he got up from the table, he felt a little bit woozy. He didn't think he had been drunk but he also didn't want to take any chances. He wasn't going to drive tonight.

This left a little dilemma. Luckily the presidential suite at the Neptune Grand was available. As he booked the room at the front desk, Veronica looked around, confused.

"I thought we were going to your place."

Logan blinked. He stifled a laugh. "Where did you get an idea like that?" He took the room keys from the concierge and handed one of them to her. "I never said that. Besides I really don't think it's smart to be driving tonight."

Veronica wasn't going to argue.

The ride to the suite was quiet…mainly because Veronica was falling asleep.

"Veronica…come on." He grabbed her hands and led her down the hallway. As soon as the door was open, he glanced at her. She was barely awake. He sighed as he swept her up in his arms, swung the door shut with his foot which jolted her awake.

She squinted then looked down. "What are you doing?"

"What does it look like?" He told her as he set her down on the bed.

"It looks like you were carrying me over a threshold."

"We're not married though." He pointed out.

"I know that." Veronica yawned then noticed Logan heading for the door. "Hey, where are you going?"

"To bed in other bedroom."

"Why? Just sleep in here. We can share a bed, Logan. We've done it before."

"Not just as friends."

"Well, there's a first time for everything." Veronica yawned again as she climbed under the covers. "Come on."

Logan shut the door and glanced over at her. Her eyes were closed. She was asleep. Since she was asleep, Logan undressed down to his boxers. Granted if she was awake he probably wouldn't have but since she was asleep.

"Goodnight Veronica." He whispered.

"Night Logan." She sighed as she drifted back off to sleep.

At two-seventeen, Veronica woke up startled. She turned over and looked at Logan who was sleeping beside her. She could tell he was naked from the waist up. She looked at herself then. She was still in her dress. She slid quietly out of the bed and unzipped the dress. She slid it down and threw it over a chair. She was left in a black bra and panties. She slowly climbed back into bed. This then woke up Logan.

His eyes cracked open. "What are you doing?"

"I don't want to ruin my dress so I took it off."

"You feeling OK?"

Veronica nodded. "Yeah." She yawned as she stared at the ceiling. "My head's throbbing but I'll live."

"Want me to get you something?"

Veronica sighed. "I have Tylenol in my purse. Can you just hand me that and get me a glass of water?"

Logan nodded. "Sure. Be back in a second."

He came back with a glass of water and grabbed her purse from the desk. "Here you go."

She dug around in her purse until she found the Tylenol. She found a couple pills and swallowed them. "Thank you." She told him as she set both the water and her purse on the nightstand.

"You're welcome." He responded as he watched her fall back into bed. He closed his eyes for a few seconds then reopened them. She was staring at the ceiling. "Aren't you going back to sleep?"

"Not yet." She told him. "But don't let me stop you. Go back to sleep."

He turned towards her. "What's on your mind?"

"You really want to know?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."

The words were barely out of his mouth when she leaned over and kissed him. He was surprised but he did kiss her back. It lasted all of about three seconds before Logan pulled away.

"Veronica…"

"It's been 7 years, Logan. I was just curious if it was still as good as I remember."

"And?"

"Of course it was. Then again I never really doubted it."

Logan cracked a smile. "Yeah, I never really doubted it either."

By three o'clock they were both sleep; this time though they were facing each other. It was just after 9 when Veronica woke up. She still felt kind of groggy. She remembered last night with Logan and remembered why they were in the hotel room together but she glanced down at herself in the bra and panties and was trying to remember what happened with her dress.

When Logan woke up a few seconds later, he caught her panicked expression. "What, did you really think that we were going to sleep together with as drunk as you were?"

She stared down at him.

"You took off your dress in the middle of the night." He told her as he sat up. "You said something about not getting it ruined."

"Oh, right." She nodded as she got out of bed to put it back on.

"Wait."

She turned around to face him. "What?"

"Let's order room service first. There's no need to be rushing back is there?"

"Well, my dad…"

"Will be fine for another hour, hour and a half, I'm sure."

Veronica sighed. This was a losing battle. "OK, yeah sure."

He headed for the bathroom. He came out a second later and threw one of the robes to her. "Here. OK I'll be right back and we can order room service.""

"Oh. Thanks." She quickly wrapped it around herself.

"Sure." He disappeared back into the bathroom and Veronica plopped down on the bed. OK so her head was still pounding some so she reached for her purse and grabbed her Tylenol. She took it with the warm water and let it slide down.

Logan returned a few minutes later wearing the other bath robe. "You doing OK?"

"Yeah, fine."

"Your head hurting?"

"A little."

"I'm honestly surprised with as much as you drank that you didn't get sick last night." He told her as he sat down next to her.

"Yeah, I'm kind of surprised too."

She stared at him for a second and he asked. "What?"

"Did you kiss me last night?"

Logan had to hold back a laugh. "Ahh…no. **You** kissed me."

"I did not."

"Yes you did and after about three seconds I put a stop to it." He informed her as he pulled out the room service menu. "As nice as it was and it was nice, we can't…"

"No, I know."

He looked at her for a few moments and then glanced at the menu again. "I'd really like to eventually…"

"Let's not go there."

He frowned. "Why not?"

"Because you're just saying that because you feel you have to."

"No, I'm not." Logan insisted. "Veronica…" He turned her head to look at him. "I've known since I was 17 years old that it was you I was supposed to be with."

She stared at him.

"But it's been 7 years since the last time we saw each other and we had hurt each other a lot back then…"

"You can say that again."

"We need to take things slow. We have to rebuild our friendship and especially our trust in each other."

"Yeah, I know."

"Because honestly, I don't know if I can take you running away from me again."

Veronica groaned. "I already told you last night…"

"That you're not going to." He finished. "I know but some proof would greatly back this up."

She thought for a moment. "Yeah, OK."

"So…we OK?"

"Yeah, we're OK." She nodded quietly.

"So what will it be…pancakes or waffles?"

* * *

**Not the greatest ending but honestly this was going on about three weeks since I had released a chapter I think. I just wanted it out. Not sure what the next chapter will be about. What would you like them to do? Give me some ideas. And review please!**


	4. Secrets

**I'm so sorry it took me this long to get this chapter out. Thanks for the reviews and I apologize for not getting any time to respond to them. I'm going to try to do better about doing that. I had a hard time debating on what I was going to write about in this chapter. I decided to take a crack at having not only a Mac/Veronica relationship/friendship but also one between Logan and Mac. I did put that they work together and since she's married to Dick, I figured they should be friends. Review please and let me know what you think.**

* * *

Logan spent the majority of his day at his office. It was Sunday so none of his employees were working. Well, expect for maybe Mac but that was her choice. She had known she had to update software by Wednesday and Dick was out surfing. She wouldn't have had to be there all day but she did half the computers before lunch and planned to do the other half after.

She knocked on Logan's door at 12:30. He looked up when she walked in. "Hey." She cracked a smile.

He smiled back at her. "Hey Mackie." Only Dick and Logan called her that." You know you don't have to be here today. The software update can certainly wait until tomorrow."

Mac shrugged. "It's not a problem, Logan. Dick's out surfing so I figured why not do a little overtime and get it over with?" She grinned and he gave her a knowing smile. "No, I just figured I might as well do it now vs. tomorrow when everyone's here. This way it won't disturb their work."

"Really nice of you, Mac. Just make sure you get to enjoy your weekend too."

"Don't worry; I am." She told him as she sat down in a leather chair in front of him. "So…are you hungry? Want to grab lunch?"

"Sure. What are you hungry for?"

"Doesn't matter."

"How about Chinese?"

Half an hour later, Mac and Logan were pouring over half a dozen boxes of Chinese food. While they ate, Mac kept secretly sneaking glances at Logan.

"Are you going to tell me why you're looking at me like that?" Logan asked as he got some of the Kung Pao Chicken.

"Like what?"

"I don't know; you tell me."

"Well, I know you had supper with Veronica last night…" She said loftily and Logan groaned. He should have figured this was coming.

"And…?"

"And…I was just wondering how it went."

Logan sighed. "OK. It was awkward." He admitted.

"Ahh…you two." Mac sighed. "You always have to make things more complicated than they are."

"Excuse me?" He raised an eyebrow.

"You hear me. And you know I'm telling you the truth."

"Mac…"

"No, Logan. Why don't you both just forget the past? All the hurt and anger and…"

"I've tried. I told her we should start brand new and just forget the past."

"And?"

"And she said she didn't want to." He took a bite of his food. "She said it would erase all of the good memories too." He stared at her for a second.

Mac sighed. "Yeah, I guess I could see that."

He stared at her for a second. "Actually now I've got a question for you."

"OK sure."

"Any reason that you never told me when she's been in town before?"

Mac gave a heavy sigh. "I don't know, Logan. I really thought that this should stay between you as far as whether or not she wanted to see you. Yes I probably should have but then again I didn't want to interfere."

"I'm honestly surprised that Dick was able to keep this a secret from me."

She shrugged. "It was easier for him to do it when Veronica lived across the country." She admitted."He's had a hard time keeping it from you since she's been back though. So much so that I had to resort to blackmail for him to keep his mouth shut."

"Blackmail, huh? And how was that done?"

"Oh, I happened to mention that if he said one word the possibility of castration would be considered."

Logan stifled a laugh. "Yeah that would do it."

"Well, when he realized that he wouldn't get another chance at having another kid…" Logan's eyes grew wide and then Mac realized what she said.

"Another kid?" He raised a curious eyebrow. It was interesting considering they don't currently have any kids.

Mac bit her lip. "Ignore that. I did not say that."

"Are you pregnant?" He grinned.

Mac hid a smile. "Yeah I am."

"Well that's great, Mac. Congratulations."

"Thanks, Logan." She smiled. "If it makes you feel better, I haven't told Veronica yet."

"Well, it does a little." He chuckled. "So when are you due?"

"Early May."

"Hmm…so you're only a couple months along then right?"

"Yeah. Still pretty early. I haven't told anyone except Dick."

"And what's he thinking of the news?"

"He thinks it's pretty cool."

"Which it is." Logan grinned as he drank his water.

"Anyway, back to the subject you don't want to talk about."

"Mac, seriously."

"Logan, look I'm not going to tell you what to do. But I strongly suggest you guys spend a lot more time talking. It's well needed."

Logan's eyebrows furrowed. "You know something."

Mac ate some of her food. "I do. It's something that she's kept quiet about for a long time."

"Like?"

"Like…you need to find out for yourself. Maybe you could open with what you've been keeping secret since she left."

Logan's gaze narrowed on her. "How do you know about that?"

"My husband." Mac smirked.

"Dick has a big mouth." Logan groaned. "It's amazing how you have the ability to blackmail him but apparently there's nothing he could do to you."

Mac grinned. "Yeah, he's threatened."

"Oh really? What did he threaten?"

"That we would stop having sex."

Logan chuckled. "He then realized that would more than likely be a punishment for him, not you right?"

"Exactly."

Logan grinned as he ate. "I know you were doing what you thought was best. Given my and Veronica's past, I think it's smart that you wouldn't want to get involved in the mess."

"Look, how about you and Veronica come over for dinner sometime?" Mac suggested as she ate her food.

"It's not necessary, Mac."

"Oh come on Logan. We were thinking of having her over for supper anyway to tell her the news. This would be nice for all of us to eat together."

Logan sighed. "Sure. That sounds good. Do you have any particular dates in mind?"

"Tomorrow night actually."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Will that work for you?"

"Yeah it should. What time and what can I bring?"

"Figure about 7:30 and I guess you can bring some beer. I can't drink and I know that Dick hates wine. Veronica does drink beer if I remember right."

Logan pursed his lips to hold in a grin. "Yeah, she does but vodka is truly her poison."

"Was she drunk last night?"

"That's putting it mildly. She wound up having about 6 martinis."

"Holy…"

"Yeah, I know she was nervous. It was awkward and very unexpected to run into her at Lilly's grave."

"Yeah, she tends to go there quite a bit. Especially now with everything that's going on with her dad."

Logan slowly nodded. "That was shocking."

Mac sighed as she ate. "It definitely threw her for a loop too. I know that she's been praying for something to work for him but everything's failing so far."

"It's got to be rough." Logan nodded.

"I don't know how I'd react if I was in her place. I mean even though my parents aren't really my parents I would still…"

"Wait what?" Logan looked at her baffled. "You're adopted? I never knew that."

Mac gave a small smile. "No, not exactly. Originally, my parents thought I was their kid and they still don't know that I found out the truth."

"Mac what are you talking about?"

She cleared her throat. "So…it was discovered a few years after I was born that I was switched at birth in the hospital."

"What?"

"Yeah, it's true." She gave a nod.

"You said you know who your parents are though?"

"I do. I hate even think of being related to that family given who their 'daughter' is."

"Wait, it's not…"

"Yeah, head bitch herself, Madison Sinclair."

Logan shuddered.

"My thoughts exactly."

"Well, at least that explains why Mr. and Mrs Sinclair were at your and Dick's wedding. I couldn't figure it out."

"That would be why. I'm assuming that Mr. Sinclair knows I'm his real daughter but I really only know for sure that Mrs. Sinclair does."

"How about Madison? Does she know?"

Mac shrugged. "My guess is no."

"Does Veronica know this?"

"Yeah, she does. She was the one who helped me put the pieces together. Back in high school, I couldn't get over how different I was than them and it made me wonder if I was adopted. I had her use her PI skills and she did some digging and that's what she came up with."

"Well, I'm glad she was there to help you."

"Well, technically she owed me."

"From what?"

"Well, do you remember the purity test that was circulating around junior year?"

"Oh yeah." He grinned.

"Well, she needed help figuring out who took Meg's fake test and posted her score. I really don't think she cared about her own. We found out how someone hacked into her email and stuff."

"Meg." Logan sighed. "That's right. Who even put that purity test together?"

Mac grinned. "Me."

Logan laughed. "Of course you did."

"Oh come on. Like you weren't a sucker to give me your 10 bucks to buy someone else's test scores."

"All hell broke loose from that test." He reminded her.

"True but I got a sweet ride out of it." She winked at Logan and he laughed. "No seriously, I never really wanted to hurt anyone especially Meg or Veronica. I know that neither one of them took the test. Pam and Kimmy were bitches for doing that to them."

"True. Of course neither of them turned out to do the greatest after high school. Pam kind of is a drug addict and had a failing movie career. Kimmy from what I hear is pregnant again and her husband is having an affair. Karma was definitely came back to bite them in the ass." Logan grinned.

Mac stared at him curiously. "I'm amazed that you even still keep up with them."

"I don't. Just heard it through the 09 grapevine, that's all."

"Would you ever consider even living in a different zip code?"

Logan shrugged. "I hadn't thought about it."

Mac nodded as she drank her water. Her eyes were on her food.

"What? You and Dick haven't left the zip code either, you know. I doubt you'd have any luck convincing him to leave. Haven't you became a convert yet?"

Mac sighed. "It's not all bad." She admitted.

Logan grinned at her.

* * *

Across town, Veronica sat in front of Lilly's grave again.

"So…how did that go?"

Veronica's eyebrows furrowed. "Didn't you see that?"

Lilly gave her a knowing smile. "No sweetie; I try to let you maintain your private life. I really only know things you've told me."

"Well, it was awkward." Veronica told her. "I thought it would be easier…"

"You two don't do things easy."

Veronica glared at her. "Well, it wasn't long after I arrived that we were fighting."

"About what?"

"Oh just assumptions and how apparently you chose to let him know that I visited you every time I was in town."

"Well, it just came out."

"Uh-huh. Anyway, I got a little tipsy."

"And what's a little?"

"Oh about 6 drinks."

Lilly's eyes grew wide. "Geez, Veronica."

"I know, I know."

"So when are you going to tell him the truth?"

Veronica frowned. "What truth?"

Lilly gave her a knowing smile. "You know what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the letters."

"I thought you said that you didn't know anything other than what I told you and I don't think I told you about the letters."

"Well, there was the first one you wrote. You came and visited me right after you tried to see him."

Veronica slowly nodded. "Right. I remember now. I had tears streaming down my face. Kicking myself for being so late."

"Right."

"He moved on." Veronica whispered.

"Veronica…"

"No, I slept last night with him and we kissed and he's taken. I don't know what I was thinking. God, I'm so stupid!"

"Veronica!"

That startled her. "What?"

"He's not taken."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "What?"

"He's not taken."

"Are you sure?"

"Uh, yeah. He…he has something he needs to tell you though."

"Oh god, what?"

"I can't tell you that. You need to hear it from him."

Veronica sighed. More secrets. She realized that right now Logan still thought that she never came and saw him. But in reality, she had. There was once. About six months after she went to Quantico, she did. She did like working for the FBI but she missed him. She ached for him. Life wasn't the same without him. She was considering actually leaving and coming back to him.

When she arrived though, she didn't expect to find a girl answering his door. She claimed to be his fiancée. Veronica was told that Logan was still at school and wouldn't be back for a couple hours. The girl asked if she should give him a message. Veronica told her to not even mention that she came by. She never gave her name so Logan would never know.

It's been easier for Veronica to let Logan be mad at her for not coming back versus him learning the truth.

Veronica's phone rang then taking her out of her daze. "Hello?"

"Veronica."

"Hey Mac. What's up?"

"Not much. Just curious if you'd like to come to dinner at our house tomorrow night?"

"Umm…sure. What's the occasion?"

"Just a little get together. Nothing overly special. Got some news."

"O…kay." Veronica thought to herself. Something was telling her that this was something big. She had to wonder if Mac was pregnant. She wouldn't be surprised. She may act it for her but truthfully Mac and Dick had been married for 4 years now. "Want me to bring something?"

"Umm…nah, that's OK. Logan's bringing beer because Dick refuses to drink wine…"

"Ahh…so Logan's invited to this soiree too?"

"Umm…yeah."

"OK, what are you up to Mac?"

"Nothing!" Mac insisted. "I just think it would be nice if we all got together. I had a talk with him today about last night…"

"What? You did?"

"Yeah, I mean. We do work together." Mac pointed out.

"Mac, it's Sunday. It's God's day. Why would you work on God's day?"

"Because Dick spent the day surfing and I had a bunch of software to upload. Besides, Logan pays excellent for overtime." She laughed and Veronica cracked a smile. She glanced over at Lilly who was smiling at her.

"What exactly did he say?"

"Not much, just that it was…"

"Awkward?" Veronica guessed.

"How did you know that?"

"Easy. It's been the word I've been using to describe how last night went."

"Got a little drunk, didn't ya?" Mac teased.

Veronica sighed. "He has a big mouth."

"No, he really doesn't. I had to pry information out of him. He knew you were nervous."

"That's putting it mildly." Veronica mumbled.

"Veronica…" Mac took a deep breath in. "You need to tell him about the letters."

"Mac…"

"Look, you're back for good now. At least I'm hoping."

"Yes, of course I am."

"You two need to be honest with each other. He's keeping stuff from you too and I told him he needs to tell you what."

"Wait, he is?" She asked nonchalantly. Veronica didn't want to let on that she already knew that he had some sort of secret. Mac wouldn't believe how she found the information out anyway.

"Yeah, he is. Seriously, Veronica. It's time you let him know what really happened back then. Give him the letter you showed me."

"I…I'll think about it."

"Think long and hard about it. I honestly believe that you two still belong together. I think if you showed him that letter, he'd know you really don't have any intention of running away again."

Veronica sighed. "OK. I'll give it a lot of thought." She cleared her throat. "What time do you want me there tomorrow night?"

"I told Logan 7:30. OK better go. I'll see you tomorrow, OK?"

"OK bye Mac."

"So…are you going to let him read it?"

"I think I will."

* * *

**OK so I'm currently writing this letter that she's going to give to Logan. Well, I plan on having her send it. I did say letters so there will be a few of them. I was just thinking. So is Logan's birthday in December? Does that seem right? I was going off dialogue in 1.21 at his fake birthday party and that was what I came up with. I originally thought it was in October. I was doing some thinking about their secrets they have. I decided not to make them complicated like a pregnancy or miscarriage and just do something simpler. If you have ideas on what should be put in these letters, let me know. I haven't decided an exact number for the letters yet; just a few for sure. Review please! I would love to hear your thoughts on the story!**


	5. The Letters

**OK so if the counter is counting right you're going to see a huge number for the word count on the chapter. This is the longest chapter I've ever written. I have written super long gilmore girl chapters but this one beats it by 1000 words. OK so this chapter was nearing 13000 words because of the letters Veronica wrote. Now _bold italics_ is her writing and the **_italics are Logan's thoughts and comments._ **I made a promise to myself that I was going to get this chapter done by today because it has now been a month. I know the chapter is lengthy but you learn the secrets they had. Technically you could say that Logan had more than one secret. Anyway, I hope you like it and please please review. I love to read them.**_  
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* * *

Veronica rang the doorbell to Mac and Dick's house just before 7:30. She fidgeted while she waited for one of them to open the door. She wasn't super dressed up but she did have on a purple silk blouse and a knee length black flared a-line skirt. She kept her hair pulled back in a low bun and had pearl earrings in that she inherited from her Grandma Reynolds. She was also wearing a very special necklace. It was a rose gold necklace with the word Love on it. She had gotten it at Tiffany's and she wore it almost every day. She had actually worn it to the cemetery the day she found Logan there but all he would have been able to see is the chain. The rest had fallen under her blouse. Tonight she kept it visible though.

"Hey Veronica!"

Veronica glanced over her shoulder and saw Logan making this way up the path to the house. "Oh hey Logan." He stood beside her and she gave him a half hug since he was carrying beer and she was actually carrying a cake in a plastic container. She knew that Mac had told her she didn't need to bring anything but she decided to make a chocolate cake anyway.

"How are you doing?"

"OK." Veronica shrugged.

"How's your dad doing?"

"I think OK. Not much has changed."

The door was thrown open then and Mac grinned. "Hey guys."

"Hey Mac." They told her in unison then looked at each other since it seemed like they were in sync.

"Did you two ride together?"

"No, just perfect timing." Logan told her as Mac held the door open for them and they made their way inside.

"Logan, Ronnie!"

"Dick." Logan nodded.

"Hi Dick." Veronica told him.

"Wow! I bet it's weird you two having to be around each other again."

Veronica and Logan shared a look.

"We're adjusting just fine, Dick." Veronica admitted.

"Yeah, we've been catching each other up."

They followed Mac into the kitchen. Logan set the beer on a counter and Veronica put her cake right next to it.

"What did you do?" Mac asked with a sly smile.

"I made the cake I know you love so much." Veronica told her. "I felt bad you weren't having me bring anything so I decided to make it and bring it anyway."

"Mmm…can't wait. Logan you'll definitely have to try her cake. It's to die for."

Logan raised an eyebrow at the assumption. Seriously? To die for? "I can't wait to try it." He admitted as he glanced over at Veronica who gave him a shy grin.

Dick took the liberty of grilling burgers and made a veggie burger for Mac. Everyone had made their way out onto the deck.

"So Ronnie…how far done would you like your burger?"

"Medium's good." Veronica told him as she took a seat and Logan took one next to her.

"Want a beer?"

"Umm…sure." He passed her a bottle. She popped the cap off and took a small drink. Mainly because Logan was watching her.

"Relax. I have no intention of getting drunk." She told him.

"Yeah, that's right, Ronnie. I heard you got a little wasted."

"Yes I was a little drunk, Dick. It rarely happens but it's not the first time I've been drunk."

"You know, I remember that Fourth of July party at Logan's before senior year…"

"I'm sorry; you claim he's changed?" Veronica told Logan dryly.

Logan shrugged. "I guess it comes and goes. Dick let's not reminisce about parties past, OK?"

"Whatever dude. So…" Dick grabbed his beer and raised it. "Mac and I wanted to share some news with both of you."

Logan and Veronica both looked at him expectedly.

"She's pregnant!"

Logan said I knew and Veronica said I figured at the exact same time.

Veronica frowned at Logan, Mac frowned at Veronica and Dick just frowned in general.

"You knew?" She asked.

"You figured?" Mac asked her. "How the hell did you figure it out?"

"Hello? What's my job people?" Veronica joked and Mac and Logan cracked grins. "Besides, it wasn't that hard to figure out. I mean you and Dick have been married 4 years now and when you said you had news, you weren't sounding upset so I figured it had to be good news." She glanced at Logan then. "How did you know?"

"She told me yesterday while we were working."

Mac's mouth dropped open. "I didn't just tell you, OK? I made a small error in something I said and he was able to figure it out. I didn't just come right out and tell him."

Veronica smiled. This was nice. She wasn't upset she was the last to know just surprised. "Regardless." She stood up and reached over and hugged Mac. "Congratulations. I'm really happy for you."

"Thanks Veronica. I'm happy to hear you say that."

"Congratulations, Dick."

"Thanks, Ronnie."

"I'm happy to hear some good news." She told them as she took a drink of her beer.

"Are things going bad for your dad?" Mac asked.

Veronica shrugged. "Well, they're not going good." She sighed. "Right now, nothing's getting worse but nothing's getting better either."

"I'm sorry." She gave her a sympathetic smile.

"Thanks, Mac. I appreciate that."

Logan just sat and watched Mac and Veronica talk. It was nice to see.

"So dude…when are we hitting the waves?" Dick asked as he took a seat next to him.

"I don't know. How were they yesterday?"

"Not bad."

"Maybe this weekend."

Truth be told, it had been awhile since Logan last went surfing. He still loved it but just never had time anymore. Sure he probably could have made some but decided against it. Then again, right now, it seemed to be needed.

"Naw, we should do it sooner than that."

"It's too late to do it tonight, Dick."

"I was thinking tomorrow, Logan."

Logan smirked. "Did you forget I'm your boss?"

"I meant after work of course."

"You should go surfing, Logan. It's been a long time since you have." Mac reminded him and Veronica frowned. Seriously? It had been a long time? Logan loved surfing.

"OK tomorrow, weather permitting of course."

"Of course but from what I heard there isn't any reason to worry about the weather. It's going to be like 80 and sunny tomorrow."

Logan smiled. Yeah, he needed to get back in the water.

Logan was broken out his trance by a ringing phone. He looked over and saw Veronica reach into her purse.

"Huh." She looked at the caller ID.

"Your dad?" Mac guessed.

"No, Wallace. Yo, Fennel!" She hit send. Logan stifled a laugh as she went back into the house.

"What's up Supafly?"

"Umm…I don't know; you called me remember?"

"Yeah, so I wanted to tell you. It was Jackie's birthday tonight…"

"Oh really? Tell her happy birthday for me."

"I will. Anyway, for her birthday present I gave her…"

"An engagement ring." She phrased it as a statement not a question.

"How did you know that?"

"Seriously all you people forget what my job is." Veronica rolled her eyes. "You have been together for awhile. So…did she say yes?"

"Yeah, she said yes."

"That's great Wallace. Congratulations!"

"Thanks, V. So how are things going there?"

Veronica looked through the doorway and saw Mac making her way towards her. "Things are good. I'm having supper with Dick, Mac and Logan…"

"Logan? Really?"

"Well, yeah. We've seen each other a few times over the last couple days. I ran into him when I visited Lilly's grave."

"Ahh…"

"Mac and Dick had some news they felt like sharing…"

Mac's mouth dropped open. "Don't tell him. I wanted to."

"Really? What's her news?"

Veronica held her phone out so Mac could yell into it. "I'm going to have a baby Wallace!"

Wallace chuckled. "That's great Mac! Congratulations!"

"He said congratulations."

"So what's going on with your dad?"

Veronica sighed. "Not much is new. Kind of stagnant right now. Nothing bad but nothing good either."

"I'm sorry, V."

"Thanks. Listen, I better go. Dick's almost done cooking the burgers so we'll be eating here."

"OK. I'll be forthcoming with details about the wedding."

"OK. Bye Wallace."

"See ya Mars."

Veronica clicked her phone off and glanced at Mac.

"So what's up?"

"He and Jackie are engaged."

"Oh! Cool."

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, I saw that one coming too."

"Not surprised. We're just so predictable now in days." Mac commented and Veronica frowned at her.

"Hey I love predictability. It breaks the chaos up."

Mac grinned. "So…"

"So…"

"When are you giving him the letters?"

"When I'm ready." Veronica told her bluntly.

"Veronica…"

"Mac, I'll do it when I'm ready." She repeated. "It may be tonight, it may be months from now but regardless, I'm not giving him them. I'm mailing them to him."

"Why?"

"Because they're all sealed and they even have stamps on them."

"How many are there?"

Veronica sighed.

"Well…" Mac pressed.

"Like 50 some." Veronica shrugged and Mac's mouth dropped open.

"What's 50 some?" Dick asked as he carried in the burgers. Logan tagged along behind him and brought Veronica her beer.

"Oh thanks." She took it from him. "My partner in the FBI. He was like 50 some." She shot a glance over at Mac who sighed. It actually wasn't a lie. Her partner she had a few years ago had been in his 50's.

"So what is up with Wallace?" Logan asked as he took a seat next to Veronica.

"He and Jackie got engaged." Veronica told him.

"Oh that's great." Logan said.

"Yeah, it is. I'll take all the good news I can get right now."

The conversation flowed pretty easy over dinner. They talked a lot about work, life in general in Neptune, and Veronica talked about her life in the FBI.

"So Ronnie…what kind of training did they put you through?"

"Do you mean training in general or the physical test?"

"Either…both."

"Well, the general training took 5 months and covered everything from operations to firearms."

"Pretty in depth." Mac commented.

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, 850 hours."

Logan's eyes grew wide at the number. "Wow!"

"Yeah but the physical test required more endurance."

"Like how?" Mac asked.

"Well, there's how many sit-ups you can do in a minute…"

"So how many did you do, Ronnie?"

"Forty-five."

Dick quietly nodded.

"Anyway, there's a timed 300 meter sprint, push-ups, and a timed 1.5 mile run."

She looked at all of them before she took a bite of her food. "You have to accumulate a total of 12 points or higher and you have to score at least a point in each category."

"So what was your score?" Logan asked as he ate his burger.

"Twenty-five."

"Impressive." Mac commented

"Thanks. It keeps you in good shape that's for sure."

"That's a pretty necklace, Veronica." Mac said as she ate her salad. "Where did you get it?"

Veronica quick glanced over at Logan who had looked at her waiting for her to answer. She touched the word. "It's from Tiffany's. I had won a raffle at Christmas and got $1000 gift card there."

Logan stopped eating. "That necklace cost a thousand dollars?"

Veronica threw him a knowing grin. "No, it didn't. I also got a ring." She flashed the peridot ring at him.

"Why did you get a necklace with the word love on it?" Dick asked and Logan had to hold back a smirk. He knew that Dick knew Veronica had never told Logan that she loved him. "I didn't think you believed in love."

Veronica's mouth dropped open. "Of course I believe in love, Dick." Veronica looked over at Mac who bit her lip. "Just because I have had a hard time saying it doesn't mean I haven't felt it."

"So how many times have you been in love?"

"What is this, the Spanish Inquisition?"

"I was just curious, OK?"

"Dick, it doesn't matter." Mac grumbled.

"Yeah, I'll second that." Logan actually said.

"Why don't you tell me first how many times you've been in love Dick and then maybe I'll consider telling you."

"Fine." He sat back and acted like he was counting in his head.

"Are you serious?" Mac exclaimed.

""Naw," He snickered. "I'm just kidding. One. Just with her." Dick leaned over and gave Mac a kiss. "So how many, Ronnie?"

Logan looked over at Veronica hopefully.

"Once, OK? I've been in love once." Veronica looked over at Logan and noticed how he seemed confused by the comment. Veronica sighed as she rose. "Mac, how about we cut up the cake now?" She headed into the kitchen.

Mac rose then too. "Sure, we'll be back in a minute guys." She leaned down to ear level on her husband. "And when we get back, the subject will be changed or you'll be sleeping on the couch tonight, got me?"

Dick nodded and watched as Mac headed into the kitchen. He then turned to Logan. "You OK dude?"

"I really wish you wouldn't have done that Dick." Logan grumbled as he polished off his beer.

"What? She never said it wasn't you."

"Well, I can pretty much figure it wasn't me." Logan shot back. "She was with Duncan first and he was her first love. She was with him a hell of a lot longer than we were together so of course it was him."

Meanwhile, inside the kitchen, Mac got plates out while Veronica started to cut the cake.

"You OK?" She asked as Veronica put a piece of cake on each plate.

"Yeah, I guess. Your husband is so annoying sometimes." Veronica grumbled.

"I am sorry about that, Veronica."

"Don't worry about it Mac. It's just I saw Logan's expression and…"

"And what?"

"Never mind." Veronica shook her head and took two pieces of cake in the dining room. She handed one of them to Logan.

"Thanks." He told her politely.

"Sure." She nodded.

They ate quietly.

"It really is very good cake, Veronica." Logan told her quietly.

"Thanks Logan. Like I said, it's Mac's favorite…"

Dick cleared his throat then.

"And apparently Dick's favorite too. I guess I didn't know that, Dick. Good thing I made it for tonight." She smiled as she finished off her own cake. "I hate to eat and run," Everyone glanced up at her in surprise. "My dad has to be at the hospital for tests at 7am so I should get going."

"Are you sure?" Mac frowned.

"No, I really would like to stay longer it's just he's going to be spending the morning and the majority of the afternoon in the hospital tomorrow."

Logan rose then after finishing his cake. "I need to get going too actually."

This brought a smile to Mac's face then. They'll walk each other out. Perfect.

"Thanks for a great meal, guys." Logan told them and Veronica nodded as she grabbed her purse from the couch. "Yes, thank you. It was really good. Bye guys."

Veronica headed out the door first with Logan following close behind her. She paused at her driver's door. She had it opened but hadn't gotten in yet. "Logan…about what I said."

"Don't worry about it, Veronica." Logan shrugged as he headed to his Range Rover.

Her head whipped around. "No Logan wait!""

"It's OK, Veronica. I understand." He came back over to her.

"No, you don't!"

He kissed her forehead. "I'll talk to you later, OK?"

"Logan!" She called after him but he didn't turn around. He just got in and quietly drove away.

Veronica was holding back tears. God, he was annoying! He didn't even let her explain! She sighed as she reluctantly got in her car and drove towards home. She now realized that she needed to send him the letters…tonight. It was the only way he was going to know the truth. She stopped by the post office and grabbed the letters from the seat. She fanned them out in her hand first. There were eight she was holding. The rest were at home. These eight were the most important to her though. She took a deep breath before tossed all 8 envelopes in the mailbox at once. Alright here goes nothing.

Logan couldn't sleep that night. The words kept echoing in his head. Veronica had only been in love once. Seriously? Just once? Had their relationship meant nothing to her? He thought she loved him. True he never heard her say I love you but…

He stopped then. He had apparently kidding himself thinking that they had some epic love story when it hadn't meant anything to her. It made him sad. He had built everything up in his mind, thinking Veronica was the one when she wasn't.

"_Seriously?" _

_Logan then glanced around and saw Lilly sitting on top of his bed beside him. "What are you doing here?"_

"_Wondering if you've went crazy, Logan."_

"_Why…"_

"_You seriously believe that Veronica didn't love you?"_

"_Well she…"_

"_You're really stupid if you believe that."_

"_Lil…"_

"_Loge, you've known Veronica for almost 15 years. You know how she works."_

_Logan was silent._

"_Think about it." Lilly disappeared then._

Logan's eyes slowly opened. It was a dream. He glanced over at his clock. It was 2:37. He sighed heavily as he put the pillow over his head. God this was going to be a long night. He reluctantly got up at 7 o'clock. He wasn't going into the office until noon. He headed to the gym and to do some working out. When he arrived back at his condo at nine, the mail had already arrived so he carried it in with him. He tossed it on the table and went into his bathroom to take a shower.

He came back out twenty minutes later after showering and shaving and dressed in his casual work clothes. As he was drinking his coffee and reading the newspaper, something caught his eye. He squinted at the envelope. He could only make out part of the address so he pushed the other mail off it. It was a letter from…Veronica? His eyebrows furrowed. She sent him a letter? Then he got to looking at the address. It appeared to be her address in Virginia. Something seemed a little off. He flipped it over to open and saw it said #2. There was a note on it that said: read in order.

"Read in order?" Logan said out loud. He fanned out the rest of his mail and found out there were another 7 letters addressed to him.

"OK, so what the hell is going on?" He said out loud. He grabbed his phone and dialed Veronica's number. It rang several times then went to voicemail._"Hi it's Veronica. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you and if this is Logan calling here's a thought I wanted to share with you. The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost. Gilbert K. Chesterton."_

"Veronica…" He sighed. "OK first of all what was that? Second, what is the deal with these letters? Third, why aren't you picking up?" He sighed again. "Can you call me back? Please? Bye."

A few seconds later he got a text message from Veronica.

_-Can't call; in hospital w/dad. Did u listen to what the quote was? 2__nd__, u didn't want to hear the truth last night; I thought u might read it. Read all the letters, Logan. V._

Logan sighed again. He couldn't believe this. He found the first letter and carefully opened it. He glanced at the date. **December 8, 2007**. His eyes grew wide. **December 8, 2007**? That was like six months after she moved to Virginia. He read slowly:

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**I'm not sure why I'm writing this. I know you've moved on and I'm too late.**_

_He stared at that statement trying to figure out what the hell she was talking about. He continued then._

_**That became apparent tonight when I showed up at your condo and your girlfriend or fiancée or whoever she was answered your door.**_

_Logan's eyes grew wide. "Oh shit!" He grumbled as he quick flipped through the letter. She had written 4 pages to this letter. Oh my god. This was the letter, he realized. This was the letter he thought she was going to lay it all out and let him know what she thought of him for moving on. He bit his lip. He slowly flipped back to the first page and decided to keep on reading._

_**I asked if I had the right apartment. She told me yes.**_

_Yeah, he knew who she was referring to and she wasn't anything to Logan. She had been his girlfriend but definitely not his fiancée. They dated for a mere six weeks before Logan got fed up with her and told her to leave him alone. All she wanted was his name…and of course his money. She didn't want Logan Echolls; she wanted Aaron Echolls' son. _

_**I guess Agatha Christie was right: 'One does not recognize the really important moments in one's life until it's too late.' Honestly, I'm not sure why I came tonight. I guess my time in Quantico has made me realize how I needed to put things in perspective. I didn't mean it. When I said I wanted you out of my life forever, I didn't mean it.**_

_Logan closed his eyes for a moment and slowly exhaled after reading that._

_**I've found you can never be fully out of my life, Logan. No matter how hard I try.**_

_**My guess is I probably won't mail this. It would be wrong of me to try and keep you from being happy. That's all I ever truly wanted. You deserve to be happy, Logan.**_

_**Since I'm not going to mail this, I might as well tell you how I feel. I keep all this stuff bottled up and I shouldn't do that. It doesn't accomplish anything. It just makes you regret things. No one should live life full of regrets. **_

_**OK. Here goes. I'm sorry.**_

_Logan's eyes grew wide. She's sorry? Did he read that right?_

_**I'm sorry for ever making you feel that you had to live up to high expectations. I never realized until we broke up just how high I had put them. You're right; I expected you to change. Change so much and make you someone you're not. You had changed though Logan. You were the obligatory jackass junior year and somehow, over time, you became a sweet, caring man that I really underappreciated.**_

_Whoa, was he reading this right? He then began to question whether or not it was really Veronica that wrote the letter. In reality he knew she did because he knew her handwriting. _

_**I should have been embracing the changes, not expecting more.**_

_**I keep thinking about the fight we had before you broke up with me. When we were in the hotel room. It was wrong of you to assume I would drop the case just because you asked me to. **_

_OK so this was sounding more like Veronica now._

_**But it was wrong of me to think you had no reason to be scared. I thought that you trusted me enough to know that even though it was risky, I'd be OK. Yes, it was scary. It's a part of the job though and it wasn't the first time. I'm kind of getting off topic. The point I wanted to make though I was wrong to just write off your feelings and worries as if they didn't matter. **_

_**As for the fight we had before I broke up with you the last time, there's something you should know.**_

_Logan groaned. He really hated thinking about that fight. _

_**You never asked me how I found out about you and Madison so I figured I would tell you. I was in a lingerie store and going to buy something really nice to wear for you. As I was picking out lingerie, I ran into Madison. She told me then and there that the two of you hooked up. She also mentioned how you wouldn't like the outfits I picked out.**_

_Logan gasped. Oh god, he moaned. _

_**I felt like I got the wind knocked out of me. I realize that you didn't know that and even if you did, I'm not sure you could have done anything different.**_

_Oh Logan wasn't so sure of that._

_**Well, except of course maybe not sleeping with her.**_

_Yep, knew she couldn't resist that comment, he thought. _

_**We can't change the past though. It's time to let it go.**_

_His eyes grew wide again. This letter was shocking the hell out of him. She wanted to let it go? The woman who told him she was never getting past it? Wow! Time in Quantico had changed her._

_**Probably one of the things that I regret most was my propensity to run away. I had never taken into consideration just how much I ran away. I can't remember the exact time that it started to happen but if I had to wager a guess, I'd say it was right after Lilly died. When I saw her lying by the pool, bleeding it was too much for me to take so anytime things began to overwhelm me, I did what became natural: I ran away. To be blunt, you overwhelm me, Logan.**_

_Overwhelm? Seriously?_

_**I don't mean badly, like Lilly's death did. It's just you made me feel all of these emotions and they happened so rapidly. I wasn't used to feeling like that. No one has ever made me feel like you did, Logan. Not even Duncan. Especially not Duncan.**_

_Holy shit was the only thing running through his mind._

_**There would be a few eyebrows raised by that revelation but it is true. Duncan was never my first love, Logan. It was you.**_

_WHAT? He screamed._

_**It's always been you.**_

_**Love. Yeah, the 4 letter word I never had the guts to tell you in person. Even now it's being written and not said verbally. My biggest regret of all was never telling you I love you. Because I do love you, Logan.**_

_Logan read that 6 word sentence over and over for a solid two minutes. _

_**Or I did.**_

_Logan's heart fell at that. _

_**I guess I need to let that go. You've moved on and in love with someone else. I really won't stand in the way of you being happy. You deserve it.**_

_**I sometimes wish I was happy.**_

_He frowned at that statement. _

_**I guess sometimes I still am but not like I used to be. The bureau is great and everything but I don't think I'm necessarily cut out for it.**_

_His eyes narrowed as he read._

_**I've spent the last week debating to myself whether or not I wanted to stay with the bureau. I have given considerable thought to leaving and coming back home.**_

_Now he felt like he got the wind knocked out of him. _

_**I wanted your opinion about this. If you had been there and I asked, would you have wanted me to come home?**_

_Hell yes! Of course! Logan screamed in his mind._

_**I'd like to think yes but with the way things were before I left I'm not so sure. Of course I know that is because of me.**_

_**Okay, well, that's all my brain can process for right now. It's 2 o'clock in the morning and I should go to bed. I haven't determined if this letter is a one-time thing or will be a reoccurrence.**_

_Obviously it was a reoccurrence._

_**I guess if the mood strikes, there will be more. OK so take care and umm…congratulations!**_

_**I love you**_

_**V**_

Logan sat back in and let out a huge sigh. Wow! He thought. He glanced down at the rest of the envelopes then. Oh god, are the rest of the letters like this? Only one way to find out I guess. He picked up the next envelope and noticed it was dated on Christmas Eve 2007.

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**OK so I guess I'll be making this a reoccurrence. Well, it's Christmas Eve in Virginia. My dad flew in a couple days ago and we have been spending free time together. I decided to stick it out at the bureau. I think it would just be too hard for me right now to come back. I know you're happy and I'm glad you are but…never mind. It's not important.**_

_Logan groaned. There she is; trying to hide her emotions again. _

_**It's really beautiful here with the snow. I haven't seen snow up close since I was little. Well I know you've seen it more recently. I'm sure it was beautiful last year too in Aspen with the mountains. **_

_He wouldn't remember. He spent the entire Aspen trip wasted. Clearly he was wasted considering the morning he woke up after sleeping with Madison._

_**It is a bitch to drive on though. Kind of had a bad experience with some ice. Luckily I didn't hit anything but it gave me a hell of an eye opener.**_

_Logan cracked a smile. _

_**I hope you had a good birthday. No, I didn't forget and I won't forget. Knowing you I'm sure you had a blast.**_

_Yeah, the love of his life was 2800 miles away and the girl who was trying to be became psychotic. No, that wasn't a good birthday. _

_**Want to know what I was just thinking about? That Christmas poker game you threw junior year and I kicked your ass. You would have never thought that I didn't know how to play poker. It was amazing how well that 3 hour crash course worked. It was kind of hilarious watching all of you guys get your asses whipped by little ol' me.**_

_Logan chuckled. Yeah he was shocked and amazed to say the least. _

_**My dad was really happy that Christmas. I got him the best Christmas present. That was the main reason I even wanted in on the game; the 3 grand it required to pay for the present.**_

_Hmm…Logan never realized why she wanted the money. _

_**You know, we were never a couple over Christmas. **_

_Yeah he knew that. _

_**Came close but never for Christmas. It doesn't necessarily matter that much to me. It was just something I realized. **_

_**Don't worry; I don't think this letter will be near as long as the last one. It's mainly to wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. I don't know what 2008 will hold but I hope it's only good things…especially for you.**_

_It's amazing how she's so worried about my happiness and never about her own, he mused__**. **_

_**I better go though. My dad is going to be arriving soon and we're going to church. Yeah, I know. I'm surprised too but it feels right.**_

_**I should really stop telling you this but we both know if I don't say it, doesn't mean that I've stopped it so I'll tell you again. I do love you, Logan. Sometimes I wish I had the ability to stop it but somehow I don't think that's going to be possible. You may move on and you have every right to. Just know I still love you. Maybe it's a good thing I'm here. That way I can't interfere back in Neptune. The distance is probably a good thing right now. **_

_**Anyway, I need to go. Have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. **_

_**I love you**_

_**V**_

Logan sighed as he finished the letter and put it back in the envelope. He set the letter on top of the 1st one. He glanced over at the time. God it was already 10:30. He decided he needed to read the rest of the letters.

He called and his assistant picked up on the first ring. "Logan Echolls' office."

"Kori, it's me."

"Oh hey Logan."

"I need you to do me a favor and reschedule the three meetings I have today. I'm not going to be in."

"Umm…" Kori paused. Logan, while being understanding of his employees and their time off, almost never took a day off. "Are you sure? Is everything OK?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. I just had some stuff come up."

"OK. Any particular date you're looking to reschedule on?"

"Look at Friday and if not then, just the first available."

"OK, will do."

"Thanks Kori." He hung up then.

Before he read the 3rd letter, he got up to refill his coffee and grabbed himself some cereal. When he opened the next letter he saw it was dated **October 3****rd****, 2008**. The 5th anniversary of Lilly's death.

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**If I ever send these letters you may end up getting pissed off. Mainly because I'm currently in Neptune. I should come and see you but …I guess I'm too scared to.**_

_Wow! Never thought that she would ever admit to being scared._

_**I haven't seen or heard anything about you getting married so I have no way of really knowing if you have or not. But as for coming to see you, it would be too hard to right now. Besides, looking at the date you know the reason I'm even in town, right?**_

_Well, before a few days ago, he would have never guessed but now he knew._

_**I can't believe it's been 5 years since Lilly died. Can you believe it's been that long? I do visit her every year on this day. I think it's only right. There were times I wasn't really there for her and of course now I'm trying to make up for it by visiting her every year on the anniversary.**_

_**I never asked you if you ever visit her. The two of you were always so…I'm trying to think of a good word to describe the two of you together. **_

_Tempestuous?_

_**Intense would probably be a good word. **_

_A nicer word to mean the same thing._

_**I sometimes wonder what would have happened if Lilly hadn't died on that day. Would the two of you be together? Would Duncan and I still be together? I know you're thinking, uhh, you were together senior year. That's not what I mean though. I meant the "perfect" world where Lilly was alive and her dad and my mom had no kind of a connection whatsoever. Would we all still be friends? I would like to believe so.**_

_So would he._

_**God, 5 years. I still think about her every day, Logan. Do you?**_

_Yeah, every day._

_**It's so weird. It's been 5 years but I can still see her in my mind. I can still hear her laugh. I'm praying it never fades.**_

_I'm praying for that too._

_**I'm beginning to probably sound more like you with these quotes but I find this one by Helen Keller is true: 'So long as the memory of certain beloved friends lives in my heart, I shall say that life is good'. **_

_**It's still why I come and see her every time I'm in town. Yeah like I said, I'm sure you're pissed off about that. I don't want my memory of her to fade. I sometimes think it might.**_

_**OK enough for now. Need to go. Take care.**_

_**Love,**_

_**V**_

Right as Logan was opening the 4th letter, he got a phone call.

"Hello?"

"Logan."

"Hey Mackie. What's up?"

"Well, I stopped by your office to talk to you about the update and stuff and Kori told me that you took the day off."

"Yep, it's true. Hard to believe isn't it?"

"It's very hard to believe. So much so, I was worried you were kidnapped and held for ransom."

Logan chuckled. "Mac…"

"Well you never really take a day off Logan. Want to share what's going on?"

"Not really but if you really need to know, I'm just reading some letters."

"The letters Veronica wrote you?"

"You knew about those too?" He exclaimed.

"I knew she wrote at least a couple but I didn't realize how many she really wrote until last night. Wow! She sent all 50 some letters?"

"What?" He screamed which made Mac hold the phone away from her ear. "There's 50 some?"

"Me and my big mouth. Yet another thing I shouldn't have said. Yes technically last night she said she wrote 50 some of them. How many did you get?"

"Like 8 of them."

"Ahh she must be pacing herself."

"She has like more than 40 more letters?"

"Yeah, she does. So…ummm…are they good letters?"

"They're shocking letters, Mac. Ones I would have never expected her to write and questioned whether or not she was the true author at first."

"And now?"

"And I know she wrote them; I know her handwriting."

"How many have you read?"

"Three; was about to start on the 4th."

"OK, I'll let you go. Happy reading."

"Thanks Mac. I'll be back tomorrow."

"OK sounds good. Bye Logan."

"Bye Mac."

The 4th letter was dated **May 23, 2009**. He remembered the date well; it was Mac and Dick's wedding.

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**OK so I'm feeling all types of guiltiness. I know Mac wasn't the happiest when I told her I wouldn't be able to make it back for the wedding. I really wanted to, it's just…right now, I'm on assignment in a very remote part of the US. Can't exactly mention where but I will tell you it's in the Midwest and all you can see for miles and miles are cornfields. **_

_**You may hate me for saying this but I am still kind of surprised that they decided to get married. I mean, I'm sure Dick has changed since the last time I was home and stuff but still. I guess I never would have thought that they would get together. As long as he makes her happy, I can't complain.**_

_**Such a loaded question, me asking this but did you ever think that the two of us would wind up getting married?**_

_I've got a diamond ring in the safe in my closet that I was going to propose with so yeah I have._

_**I used to think about it…a lot actually.**_

_Are you trying to kill me? I mean seriously!_

_**I guess there's no sense in entertaining that idea anymore though. It won't happen.**_

_I haven't even up hope yet, sugar puss._

_**I love you but I really need to stop with these fantasies that are never coming true. **_

_If she really believed that, she would stop writing these letters. _

_**Since we broke up, I haven't really thought much about marriage…or guys in general. Being here, well the job keeps me busy. You don't get much of a social life. **_

_Logan felt bad for her._

_**I'm not saying that to get pity though.**_

_Sure you're not, he chuckled to himself. _

_**The job is time consuming though in all aspects. I mean I can't even make it back for one of my best friend's weddings. I feel really bad about not being there. **_

_**Anyway, need to go for now. **_

_**Love,**_

_**Veronica**_

Logan sighed as he rose from his seat. He hadn't actually looked at it recently. He kept it in a small safe in the back of his huge walk in closet. He turned the dial of the combination on the safe. He pulled on the handle to open the door.

He did keep a bunch of items in it. Mostly papers about his trust and his company…and his will. He knew that, at almost 26, it shouldn't be a priority but given his family he figured he should always be prepared. He had another two copies of it: one in a safety deposit box at the bank and one with his lawyer. He found the little ring box on the top shelf towards the back. He pulled it out and slowly opened it. There it sat: it was a 5 carat, emerald cut diamond ring in a platinum setting with prong set diamonds. He took it out and held it up to the light. It sparkled as a response which caused him to crack a smile

He had dreamed for a long time that Veronica would wear it someday. It was a very special ring. It was his great grandma Lester's and it had been his mom's engagement ring. Well, until Aaron decided that she needed a different ring. A bigger ring to make up for his latest infidelity. The night she got her new ring, she gave the ring she had been wearing to Logan. She told him to hang onto it and only give it to someone he truly loved. He told her that he stopped believing in love the day Lilly died.

Lynn grabbed his hand then and gave it a squeeze. "Lilly was a sweet girl. I know you loved her very much. But don't close your heart, Logan. That's the worst thing you can do. You'll find love again, Logan. I'm sure of it."

Logan had remained skeptical. Especially since 6 weeks after that conversation his mother allegedly leapt to her death off the Coronado Bridge. It took a long time but his mom had been right. He did find love again. He never thought it would be possible to love anyone more than he loved Lilly but he did.

When he and Veronica got back together during college, it made Logan realize that the six weeks he spent away from her was pure torture. He never wanted to live without her again. So he decided that he was ready to propose. To give her the ring that his mom insisted on having it saved for someone that he really loved. Then the night came and his whole future with Veronica came to a grinding halt. It was probably a good thing that Veronica never knew he was going to propose because he didn't think he would be able to hear her say no without letting his emotions get the better of him.

He gently put the ring back in the box and returned it to its usual spot. Once he locked the safe up, he returned to the kitchen to keep reading. He glanced at the clock and noticed it was just past noon.

The next letter was dated _**4-12-10.**_

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**Well, I decided I had to write today. There aren't a whole hell of a lot of days that really do hold special significance to us but there are some. October 3**__**rd**__**, the day Lilly died, May 13**__**th**__** the night of the Alterna-prom, June 17**__**th**__** the day we got back together and June 28**__**th**__** the first time we had sex.**_

_Logan grinned. Wow she had an excellent memory. Then again, so did he because he remembered all of the dates too, including this one._

_**Then there's today. Five years ago today was our first kiss. **_

_Logan grinned at the memory. _

_**Sometimes it seems like that was just yesterday and then other times it seems longer than 5 years ago. It still shocked the hell out of me that you kissed me. Of course your retort would be: 'Yeah but you kissed me first'.**_

_Logan chuckled. She knew him too well._

_**It's true; I did but mine was more of a thank you kiss for saving me from the crazy ATF agent who we thought was planning on holding me hostage.**_

_**After I did, I looked into your eyes and I could tell you were shocked. The next thing that ran through my mind was: 'OK so we'll never try that again'. But you surprised me. Well, shocked me. I was more or less at a loss of what I was supposed to do. You solved that though by turning 1 kiss into several. When I pulled away it looked like you had been thinking the same thing as me…'Oh my god, what did we just do?' But it was amazing.**_

_Logan grinned. He couldn't have agreed more._

_**I'm hoping you had a similar thought.**_

_**As I reread this, I have to laugh because I don't remember the last time I was acting like such a girl.**_

_Logan laughed. That's true. She was normally the butch one._

_**The very thought of me reminiscing about our first kiss has got to seem pretentious. Honestly, it was one of the best days of my life though, Logan. No one has ever kissed me the way that you did. **_

_An eyebrow shot up at that._

_**There was always just this…heat to it, you know?**_

_Oh he knew._

_**It's silly to dwell on this. I mean, it's in the past. It's time to move on. I'm just lacking the motivation to do it. Well you can say I have moved on at least physically. Mentally and emotionally, that's completely different.**_

_**Maybe someday I'll get past it. **_

_Logan read the next part carefully._

_**I won't be home until I do though.**_

_God this was killing him! It was like slow torture. So what did that mean? Was she over him now that she was back? The letters, while they cleared up a lot, they left him confused about other things. _

_**My final thought for this letter: A kiss seals two souls for a moment in time. –Levende Waters**_

_**I love you,**_

_**Veronica**_

Logan sighed as he looked over and the rest of his mail. The majority of it was bills and flyers. He loved the letters but he needed a break from them. It was after 2:30 already. He had spent the last 5 hours reading 5 letters. It's not that they were long but they were time consuming as far as processing the information she was telling him. He was astounded to hear some of the things she was admitting.

As he reviewed his Am Ex credit card statement, his phone rang. He didn't even check the caller ID before he answered.

"Logan Echolls." He said as he scanned the charges.

"So…how are we doing on the letters?"

Veronica.

"I've read 5 of them." He told her as he set the bill down. "Where are you?"

"Calling from a payphone in the hospital." She explained. He could hear the intercom in the background paging a doctor to a certain patient's room. "Dad has one more test and then he's done for the day."

There was dead silence for about 15 seconds before Veronica said.

"Logan? Did I lose you?"

"I'm guessing you mean phone wise."

"Umm…yeah. Are you OK?"

"Is it true that you have another 50 of these letters?"

Veronica groaned. "God, Mac has a big mouth. I should have never told her that."

"So you do?"

"Yes I do."

"And why just these 8 then?"

"Because to me they're the most important 8."

"Am I going to get to read the rest?"

Veronica sighed. "Maybe. Eventually."

"Veronica…"

"Logan…yes, you'll get to read them." She sighed again. "Probably not all at once. I'm not sure yet."

"Miss Mars?" Logan could hear in the background.

"Yeah, one second. Look, I need to go. The doctor's here so I need to talk to him. Make sure you read them all, OK?"

"I will."

"OK bye Logan."

"Bye Veronica."

He finished reviewing the rest of his mail. He had received a wedding invitation from Trina. Yeah, technically it was her second marriage already. The first one lasted a whopping 65 days. She swore to Logan that this guy loved her though. The wedding was in March next year. She was planning ahead though because she was having the wedding in Jamaica. She would be getting married sooner except for the fact that she was currently 8 months pregnant with her 1st baby. The March timeline was so she could lose the baby weight to fit into her wedding dress.

Whatever; Logan wasn't going to question it. Whatever he suggested, she was going to ignore anyway. He had nothing against the fact that she had gotten knocked up before she had been married or even the fact that she was waiting until after the baby was born to have the wedding. It was the fact that she barely knew this guy. They had been dating all of 6 weeks when she got pregnant. They had been engaged already for 6 months and even though they managed to stay engaged, there was still some quality about the guy that Logan despised.

He couldn't pinpoint it but he was pretty sure that it had to do with this guy knowing that Trina was Aaron Echolls' daughter. Trina always wore rose colored glasses and Logan…well, he remained her constant reality check. She chose to ignore him most of the time and then complained when he turned out to be right.

He was pretty sure he wasn't going to the wedding. He hadn't been to Jamaica since he was a teenager and it would be nice to go but then again, not to see Trina totally screw up her life.

To take his mind off of Trina and her dreaded upcoming nuptials he decided it was time to read another letter. This was dated **6-28-11**. Logan grinned. He knew that if she did a five year anniversary of the date they had kissed, this letter was sure to follow.

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**So you have to love me for writing these anniversary letters, right? I don't know what they are considered to you but the majority of them to me are considered milestones. Why this one is so important is simple. You were the first guy that I had slept with that I was in love with. I know you're questioning that but I was telling you the truth with that first letter: you were my first love. **_

_Logan cracked a smile. He really did want to believe that._

_**I know it's silly and girly and goes completely against what the norm is for me but it meant a lot to me.**_

_Meant a lot to me too._

_**Part of the reason it meant so much to me was that you understood what happened in the past. We may not have went the slowest relationship wise since we had sex like two days after I got back from New York but you were really understanding and allowed me to control everything. That was important to me.**_

_He knew it was._

_**You always made me feel wanted. The way you would look at me. The way you would touch me. The way you would talk to me. You had this great ability to make me feel safe. By doing that, it gave me the ability to trust you. **_

_Trust. Something that was brought up that night they had drinks. She said she trusted him. By reading it, it was making him feel wanted. _

_**OK so I'll admit something to you. It's been 4 years now that I've been here and I haven't been with anyone else since the last time you and I were together.**_

_At first, Logan's eyes went wide and then narrowed. That was obviously a lie._

_**And before you start questioning the validity of that answer, I have to remind you that I did not sleep with Piz. We had a pretty hot make out session, yes but we never…went all the way.**_

_She knew him too well._

_**I know it seems like I'm making this up but the job really keeps me from having a social life. I know it probably hasn't been that way for you though. **_

_Logan smirked. Yeah, he couldn't say the same as her. _

_**Anyway, I was trying to come up with some nice quote for you about sex and there were all these super funny ones but here's one for you: Intense love does not measure; it just gives. –Mother Teresa. **_

_**But if you want a funny sex one, here's one: Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. –Billy Crystal.**_

_Logan chuckled. True; very true, he thought._

_**Anyway, need to go. **_

_**I love you**_

_**V**_

He had never verbalized what he had thought of their sex life. . Well, not into actual sentences. There wasn't anything better than making love to Veronica though. Lilly and Kendall had been different. Lilly had been the first girl he had ever slept with and she was good. So was Kendall but all he thought of her as was an easy lay. There had been no real emotions with Kendall.

With Veronica, they had taken their time with the whole experience. It made him fall in love with her even more.

The next letter was dated _**12-22-12**_ .

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**Wow! I can't believe it is Xmas already. God, the years are going by so quickly. I've already been in Virginia for over 5 years. It gets lonely sometimes. Especially around this time of year. **_

_**My dad arrived tonight. I can't put my finger on it but I'm sure he's keeping something from me.**_

_Logan smirked. She did have the uncanny ability to foretell the future. What he guessed this was when she found out about the cancer. _

_**He was looking kind of pale. He won't tell me anything and it is as annoying as hell! You know how much I hate it when he does this.**_

_Oh he knew alright._

_**I hope you had a great birthday and I hope you have a great Christmas. Hard to believe we're 25 now isn't it? God, I'm starting to feel old!**_

_Logan laughed at that._

_**The bureau hosted their annual Christmas party a couple weeks ago. It was pretty nice. They were doing raffles and I actually won a $1000 gift card to Tiffany's. I know; I'm shocked too. I've already spent it too. I bought a couple things. I got a really pretty peridot ring. I don't normally get peridot jewelry because I'm not a huge fan of it but it is my birthstone so I figured I should have something with it. Then I also got a rose gold necklace with the word Love spelled out in small diamonds. It's really beautiful.**_

_**I've worn the necklace that Lilly gave me almost every day for 10 years but I think it's time to switch my jewelry up. I still plan to wear it occasionally but it's time to mainly retire it. **_

_**I bought this necklace for a few different reasons. One was, like I said, it's beautiful. Two, contrary to what everyone probably thinks, I do still believe in love. Not just in love, but in us. Do you realize that if you put the first 2 letters of each our names together, it spells out love?**_

_Logan read that last line over. Actually no he hadn't thought about it but that was true. Was that fate? Just a good coincidence? He wasn't sure but it was amusing to say the least._

_**Third I wanted something that reminded me of you. I realize it wouldn't under normal circumstances but with the word love being spelled from our names means something to me. I could have chosen a ring but I chose the necklace so it would be closer to my heart.**_

_Logan stifled a laugh._

_**Yeah, yeah. Cheesy, I know but it's true. **_

_The letter continued a week later and was then dated __**12-29-12.**_

_**So…umm my dad finally told me what was going on. He didn't want to tell me before Xmas because he didn't want to ruin it for me. It turns out he has cancer, Logan. I can't believe he kept this from me. I asked him how long he has known and he told me awhile. Awhile, I asked. Weeks, months, what? Then he told me he's known for over a year. I can't believe this!**_

_Logan's expression went crestfallen. _

_**How could he keep something so important from me, you know? His reasoning he claims was because he didn't want to worry me. That just pissed me off even more. I'm actually not currently talking to him. I know, it's a shocker but I'm so mad! It didn't help when I told him I was coming home to be with him and he refused. Can you believe that? He refused to let me come home. He told me it wasn't necessary. He said that the doctors know what they're doing and that his treatment is going pretty good. I'm pretty sure he's lying about that though. I guess I can't do anything. I've never felt so helpless as I do right now.**_

_Logan felt really bad for her. So bad he could have actually cried but he didn't. He held it in._

_**I'm still going to do everything in my power to get home to help him. I guess that means I'm going to have to come to terms with my feelings for you and the fact that you're probably married by now.**_

_Logan rolled his eyes. Had she sent these damn letters she would have known that he wasn't. _

_**I'll have to stop and learn to ignore my feelings. It's going to be hard but I know I have to. **_

_**Need to go. I'm going to do some looking up about Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. That's what dad has. I need to know more about it. **_

_**Love,**_

_**Veronica**_

_**My favorite quote of all: I thought our story was epic, you know? You and me. Spanning years and continents. Lives ruined, bloodshed. Epic. –Logan Echolls (yeah that's your quote from the Alternaprom). **_

Logan smirked. His memory from that night is still foggy but he did remember talking about being epic and bloodshed. Those were the two words that stood out to him. Before Logan could read the last letter, he decided to eat something. It was almost 3:30 and he really hadn't ate anything. He made himself a sandwich and grabbed a pop to drink. Fifteen minutes later, he had polished off the sandwich and found the last letter. He slowly exhaled trying to anticipate what this letter said. It was _**8-14-13.**_

_**Dear Logan,**_

_**So this is going to be the last letter I write you. Mainly because I'm moving home. My dad's been getting worse. Once again, he waited forever to tell me that. I finally put my foot down. I told him I'm moving home whether he liked it or not. He finally gave in.**_

_**This is going to be hard. Really hard. I haven't overcame my feelings for you yet and it's going to be inevitable.**_

_Logan exhaled. So they're still there. Then again, it wasn't a huge surprise. After all, his feelings for her were still there too._

_**The distance made it easier. Have to love my procrastination. Work was a good distraction. It made me focus on other people's problems instead of my own.**_

_Logan smirked._

_**I don't know how we're going to do this. Then again, maybe it won't be so hard. I mean, maybe you hate me. **_

_He groaned._

_**Maybe this is going to be like the start of junior year all over again. **_

_Logan sighed. Junior year. Yeah when he turned bashing her headlights into foreplay. He was still more than pissed that she chose her dad over her friends but as time went on, he realized that she didn't have much of a choice. Her dad had been her rock through everything. Even though ultimately Keith was wrong about Jake killing Lilly, he was right about Jake lying about where he was. _

_**I can't say I wouldn't deserve it if that was really how you felt.**_

_But it wasn't, Logan murmured. When she left, Logan was sad that she had given up. He had hoped she would change her mind but after awhile, he realized that was a lost cause. But now, he knew she hadn't. She tried and she thought she had lost. _

_**I guess I have to be prepared for that in case that's how you feel. Being here changed me, Logan. It made me realize just how empty and lonely my life has been without you. You're probably thinking, 'Really? It took you 7 years to figure that out?' **_

_He grinned._

_**No I've known it and technically tried rectify it by attempting to move on. But I can count on both hands the number of dates I've been on since I've been in Quantico.**_

_Logan raised an eyebrow at that._

_**I can count on one hand the number of friends I've made while I was here. I'm working on trusting people. It's still tough though. After what I went through with my mom and now my dad lying to me about just how bad the cancer is, it's hard to trust them. **_

_He could understand that._

_**I tracked my mom down.**_

_His eyes grew wide._

_**She's in Nevada or she was about 3 months ago. I had to use some resources from the FBI to find her but I did. I wanted to tell her about my dad. She hasn't gotten any better though Logan. She's still an alcoholic and now I think she may even turned to drugs.**_

_Logan's expression was crestfallen. _

_**She looked horrible, Logan. Like she was completely strung out. I would try to get her help but the last time I did that she didn't even complete her treatment and I lost thousands of dollars. I've decided that if she wants help, she'll have to do it herself. So I told her about my dad and all she did was mumble how she was sorry to hear it. I couldn't believe she didn't even care. Then again, I shouldn't be surprised. I'm sure if Jake had ended up getting cancer, she would have cared.**_

_Logan bit his lip. He knew her mom's past with Duncan's dad. He never told Veronica this but Lilly had told him the reason that Duncan broke up with Veronica. He figured if he told her the truth she wouldn't believe him. It wasn't long after that Lilly died and all hell broke loose._

_**God this letter is depressing! I should really go pack. My flight leaves in two days and I haven't even really started yet. See? My procrastination :D. Anyway, need to go. I'll see you soon. **_

_**My final quote for you: Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage. –Lao Tzu**_

_**I really hope you don't hate me, Logan. I would deserve it if you did given how I left things. I do love you. A lot. I'll see you soon.**_

_**Love,**_

_**Veronica **_

Logan slowly exhaled as he put the last letter on the growing stack of letters. He wasn't aware of what time it was until his phone started ringing. His mind had been wandering since he finished reading the last letter. The next thing he knew it was just after 5. He saw it was Dick calling and answered on the 2nd ring.

"Hey man."

"Dude, where the hell are you? I thought we were hitting the waves today."

"Have to take a rain check today, Dick." He rose from his seat and headed into his bedroom to get his wallet. "I've got to go see Veronica."

"What's going on?"

"She wrote me a bunch of letters when she was in Quantico. I got them this morning."

"Wow! Ronnie's been back for almost 2 months. The postal system sucks, man."

Logan couldn't help but chuckle. "Dick, she kept them and mailed them last night from here."

"Why wouldn't she send them?"

Logan shrugged. "I don't know. I guess she was afraid to. They started about 6 months after she moved. I need to go though. She should be back from the hospital by now."

"OK. Later dude."

It was a 20 minute drive from Logan's condo to Veronica's apartment. In that time, he contemplated exactly what he was going to say to her. He wanted to tell her he loved her. That he never stopped. He then thought that it would be too soon. His mind was racing. It was a lot of information to take in. Granted some of it was repeated. He decided to wait and see what Veronica had to say.

He hesitated before he knocked. He was nervous. Why the hell was he nervous? He quickly knocked before he could second guess himself.

"Logan." Keith answered. He was dressed in a gray t-shirt and black sweatpants.

"Oh, Mr. Mars. Hey, how are you?"

"I'm doing OK. Are you looking for Veronica?"

"Yeah, is she here?"

"Actually she ran to the office for a little while. Do you know where the new office is?"

New office? "Uh, no. I didn't realize there was a new office."

"Yeah, only been there for about 3 weeks. Pretty nice. She shouldn't be too much longer but if you want you can go there."

Keith gave him the new address and Logan headed out. Before he left though he wished the best to Keith and Keith told him thank you.

It took another 10 minutes to get to the new office. When Logan got to the door, he noticed that underneath the Mars Investigations logo, there was only Veronica's name listed. Keith failed to mention that this was solely her office. He checked and the door was unlocked. It was just before 5:30 now and he was unsure of when she actually closed up. Then again, the PI business wasn't exactly a 9 to 5 job.

When he walked in, he glanced around. Wow was the 1st immediate thought. The office was twice as big as the old one. There was a decent sized waiting room that painted an ocean blue color and a gray velour sofa was against the north wall. When he turned around, Logan noticed a small kitchen. It was bigger than the kitchen in the old office though. The appliances, which were a stove, refrigerator, and a microwave, were relatively new too. Logan came back out and noticed there was a secretary's desk that was currently empty. He glanced at the name and saw Alex Meyers. Hmm…Logan had to wonder if that was a guy or a girl. Veronica's door to her office was currently closed.

He was about to knock when he heard Veronica's voice.

"So is everything ready for night?" She asked.

"Yep, good to go." Logan heard a masculine voice. "I'm surprised you came in tonight. Think I couldn't handle it?" The guy teased.

Veronica gave a small laugh. "I never worry about that, Alex. After all, we did work together in Quantico."

Logan listened closer then. This was her partner there. Hmm…it made him wonder whether or not anything was going on with them.

"You know, I do appreciate you doing this. I'm really surprised that your wife was OK with the move back to California."

Well, never mind, Logan thought. I guess he's married.

"Well, Lizzie wasn't too hard to convince. After all there are warmer winters here vs. Virginia."

"True that."

It was quiet for a few seconds.

"You OK, Veronica?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just got a lot on my mind."

"What's going on? Is it your dad?"

"No, he's doing pretty good, Alex. We won't know the test results until tomorrow but dad's feeling pretty good right now. That's why I even came in tonight."

"Well, I'm sure he appreciates having you at home."

"I didn't give him a choice." Veronica admitted. "Besides I couldn't run away from my life anymore."

Logan held in a grin.

"So what's really going on?"

"Alex, you don't have to do this." Her voice sounded sheepish.

"Oh come on Ronnie. We worked together for over a year and you've heard me talk about problems with the wife and kids and the job. It's fine. What's going on?"

"Sometimes I think about the past and whether or not it can be fixed. There were a lot of things that I broke."

"Like what?"

"Like my friendships. I missed seeing one of my best friends get married. I haven't gotten over that. I know Mac doesn't appear to be holding any grudges but it still gets to me."

"That's understandable."

"Then there's dad. I can't help but think if I had been here sooner…"

"Veronica you can't think like that."

"I know but still. Then there's the one that had suffered the most. That would be the relationship with my ex-boyfriend."

Logan bit his lip as he heard this.

"Did you break up because you went to work for the FBI?"

Logan wished it was that easy.

"No, no. We had broken up a couple months before I left for Quantico. But there was some stuff that I said to him before I left that I wish I could take back."

"Bad?"

"Well, I did tell him that he was out of my life forever."

"Ooo…"

"Yeah, I really shouldn't have done that."

"Well, what about now? Does he know you're back in Neptune?"

"Yeah, he does. Actually we've had dinner together a couple times."

"Well, that's good."

"Yeah, but it's a long way to go back to where we were."

"Still love him?"

"Yeah, I do. I can't really imagine a time I won't."

Logan grinned. God, he needed to hear that.

"I'm trying to fix the past. I started to put things in motion last night. I just have to wait and see what's going to happen."

"I hope it all works out for you."

"Thanks, Alex. I appreciate that."

It got quiet then.

"What?" Alex asked.

"Haven't you eavesdropped enough tonight, Logan?" Veronica called out and Logan's eyes grew wide. He didn't realize that she could see him through the frosted glass panel on the door.

He hesitated for a moment.

"Logan, get your ass in here and quit being a lurker."

Logan cleared his throat and opened the door. Alex had turned around to look at him. The first thing that he noticed was that Alex was huge. When he stood up, it appeared he had a good 4 or 5 inches on Logan and about 60 pounds of muscle more than him too.

"Umm…hey Veronica."

Veronica smirked behind her executive desk. "Hey Logan. Meet Alex Meyers. He was my partner in Quantico last year. Alex, this is my ex-boyfriend, Logan Echolls."

They shook hands. Alex's eyes grew wide and looked back at Veronica. "Echolls?"

"Yeah, yeah. Don't mention his dad though, OK?"

"You never mentioned you dated Logan Echolls."

"Really?" Logan raised a curious eyebrow. "Well, what is up with that, sugar puss?"

Veronica groaned while the other two laughed.

"Sugar puss?" Alex tried to hold in his laughter.

"Seriously Logan it's been 9 years since you last used that nickname. You couldn't let it die?"

"Nope. So Alex, out of curiosity did she mention dating Duncan?"

"Duncan?"

"I didn't really talk much about my dating life, Logan."

"Duncan? Duncan Kane, Jake Kane's son?"

Veronica sighed. "The one and only."

"Well, I remember you were friends with his sister."

Veronica and Logan shared a look which Alex noticed. "What?"

Veronica shook her head. "Yeah, I was friends with Lilly."

"Something I'm missing?" Alex looked between them.

"Lilly was actually Logan's ex-girlfriend." Veronica told him quietly.

"Oh. Oh that's right; I think I remember hearing about that."

"Probably on the Tinseltown Diaries I'm sure." Logan told him.

"Yeah, I think so." Alex said sheepishly then turned to Veronica. "Wow! You've been holding out on me, Mars."

Veronica smirked. "Oh, give me a break, Meyers you knew everything; you just didn't know their names."

"True. Well, better get going. Going to go eat with Lizzie and the kids before I head out for the night."

"Thanks for doing the security detail."

"Not a problem. I'll see you tomorrow. Nice to meet you, Logan."

"Yeah, likewise Alex."

Veronica rose then and followed Alex out. She locked the main door after he left. She sighed as she came back in and tucked her hair behind her ears.

"So how did you know it was me?" He took a seat in the chair in front of her desk.

"Well, given how my dad was dressed when I left and besides the fact that I sent you 8 letters last night. Yeah I knew you'd show up eventually. Did you read all of them?"

"Yeah, I did. Just got done reading them a little bit ago." He admitted.

"Did it really take you 8 hours to read all of them?"

"Well, honestly I had to take breaks in between reading them."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, I needed time to process them. Most of them shocked the hell out of me, Veronica."

Veronica smirked. "I had to wonder if they would. So…"

"So…what?"

"Really? That's all you have to say about them?"

"OK, I guess the most important question would be…"

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you send them?"

Veronica sighed. "I told you why."

"But I was never engaged!" Logan exclaimed. "If you had sent them, you would have known that."

"So I was naïve enough to take the girl at her word. It had been six months, Logan. Anything was possible."

He sighed. "Yeah, I guess. I'd like to think you know me better than to think I'd rush into marriage."

"I'd like to think so too but things change." She sank into her seat. "I wasn't sure if they did or not."

"They haven't changed at all." Logan told her. "So can I ask you another question?"

"Well, I figure you're going to have a lot of them so yeah go ahead."

"If I had asked you to come home, you seriously would have?"

She gazed at him. She had seen this look before. It was the look he had given her the night he opened the door at the Grand and found her standing there. It was one of longing and hope. "Yeah, I would have. I had a lot of serious doubts about staying but ultimately I'm glad I did."

Logan's expression faltered so Veronica quickly added. "That doesn't mean that I didn't wish I was here with you, Logan. I did. I only stayed away as long as I did because I thought you deserve to be happy even if it wasn't with me."

"You said that a lot in your letters. That I deserve to be happy."

She nodded. "Yeah, you do."

"Well thank you but there's something you should remember."

Her eyes narrowed. "OK, what's that?"

"How could I be happy when the love of my life was 2800 miles away?"

"So why didn't you do anything about it?"

"I did." He revealed.

Veronica frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"I was in Quantico."

"What? When?" Veronica was shocked.

"I don't know." Logan shrugged. "Like a year after you left."

"Why didn't I know this?"

"Because I guess I was like you thinking I was infringing on your happiness."

She was stunned to say the least. "I can't believe this."

"I know; me either."

It was quiet for about 30 seconds then Veronica quietly asked. "So I'm the love of your life?"

"You've known that since we got back together in college."

"I thought that title was reserved for…"

"She was my first love, Veronica. She's also been gone for 10 years now. Come on, you've known this."

"I could say the same about you."

Logan frowned. "What does that mean?"

"Oh come on Logan. I could tell last night when I said I had been in love once, you thought I wasn't talking about you."

"Can you blame me? Veronica, you were with Duncan for 2 years combined between before Lilly's death and after and you're trying to tell me that he wasn't…"

"No! He wasn't!" Veronica stressed. She sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. "Ok, yes, I thought I was in love with him. You're 15 and the boy you like is finally paying attention to you and you automatically think you're "in love". It was more of a puppy love infatuation type thing."

Logan sat there, quiet.

"We had a much deeper relationship than Duncan and I ever did even if we weren't together near as long as he and I were. I wasn't in love with him, Logan. I was never in love until I was with you."

"Oh that was so close. Want to try another variation?"

Veronica looked at him curiously. "Another variation of what? Of saying I love you?"

Logan's breath hitched in his throat. Was he finally going to hear her say it? "Yeah."

"Te amo Logan."

"Veronica."

"Ooo…te amo mucho beary."

Logan smirked. "En ingles por favor."

"Well, you said another variation. You never said it had to be English."

He gave her a knowing smile. "Veronica…"

"Yes, Logan. I love you. I love you beary much."

He laughed. Ahh…that was what he figured she said the second time but wasn't sure. He got up and leaned over and gave her a small kiss. "I love you too."

Veronica grinned. She even blushed a little which caused Logan to laugh as he sat back down.

Veronica looked over at him uncertain which caused him to frown. "What's wrong?"

"So what does this mean?"

"What does what mean?"

"Where are we, Logan?"

He sighed. "That's what we need to figure out."

* * *

**I just had to throw in that I love you beary much one. OK, I do remember a little Spanish but did also used the translator and that translation is what kept coming up for I love you beary much. Anyway, so I wasn't necessarily going to end there but decided to because this chapter was so close to 13000 words. I think I may pick it up with them discussing her letters more. So...where are they? I was going to start having them go very slow back at dating but then again I could see them waiting just a little bit longer. Thanksgiving? Beginning of December? They will be together by Christmas though. I've written the Xmas chapter already(well started to) I really do want opinions here people! I'm having a hard time debating. So another opinion that I brought up in the last chapter. Do we know when Logan's birthday is? I thought October but then thought December. Which one do you want it? This was a little vague I'm sure. This is important because it has to do with Veronica's Xmas present. I think I may do December but if you want October let me know. Anyway, I know it was extremely long but hopefully it was still somewhat interesting. Review people! Seriously I love reading them.**


	6. Who Knew You Could Act Like a Girl?

**OK so this chapter wasn't nearly as long as the last one. However, I still think doing around 5000 words is a pretty good sized chapter. I wasn't sure if the title was going to cut off or not but the chapter's called Who Knew You Could Act Like a Girl? I think it's fitting really. Anyway, read and review please! I love to read them. Speaking of which, I'm so amazed at getting 14 reviews for the last chapter! Thank you! I appreciate them! I worried since the chapter was so big that it might turn people away but it didn't. I had a lot of people tell me that they could picture Logan and Veronica and their reactions. That made me smile because I tried to keep it realistic to who they are. Anyway, please review again. You're the greatest reviewers!**

* * *

"You know what I found refreshing about those letters?" Logan said as he popped open two beers and handed one to her. Half an hour after he had arrived, Logan left and came back with a pizza and some beers. They were now finally ready to have the inevitable but still awkward talk about her letters.

"What's that?"

"You are actually a girl."

Veronica's expression was a mixture of confusion and amusement. "Uh…Logan you got confirmation of that 7 years ago when we slept together although I'm pretty sure you knew that before then. I've always been a girl."

Logan laughed. "Yeah, but who knew you could actually act like a girl too?"

"Logan…"

"What? We apparently couldn't decide when we were together which one of us was the guy in the relationship."

Veronica grinned. "Oh come on now I wasn't that butch."

"Oh yes you were." Logan grinned back at her. "But it was very amusing to know you actually still have a feminine side buried under that tough as nails side you keep up."

"I'm sure it was nice to know that." Veronica grabbed a slice of cheese pizza and took a bite of it. "They were anniversaries though and especially since they were good anniversaries I thought that it would be nice to write the letters to commemorate them."

"It was. I had never asked you about any of that." Logan admitted. "Mainly because I figured you would be bitching about it and saying how you had no idea what I was talking about."

"So are you saying you actually remembered all those dates?"

Logan surprised her by nodding. "Yeah, I did. Do I have them written down somewhere? No but I do remember them. They actually meant a lot to me. Probably just as much as they meant to you."

Veronica's eyes grew wide. "Seriously?"

"Of course." He nodded. "Veronica, you were my second serious girlfriend. I've only had two of them in my whole life. Even after you left, I dated but never seriously."

"So the girl I met…"

Logan sighed. "Oh she wanted to be. She had become obsessed with me. Everything always led back to the fact…."

"That you're Aaron's son." Veronica finished.

"That's why it's just been you and Lilly. You both liked me for me and it had nothing to him."

"Quite frankly and I can only speak for myself here but I liked you in spite of him. I'd say may he rest in peace but that's a blatant lie. With the hell he put you, me, Lilly and Duncan through, he deserves to burn in hell."

Logan smirked. "I'll drink to that." He laughed as they clinked their beer bottles together and each of them took a drink.

"Let's get off of him." Logan suggested as he grabbed a slice of pizza and took a bite of it.

"Good idea." She told him as she took a drink of her beer. "So…what else surprised you about the letters?"

"You actually apologizing."

Veronica gave a small smile. "I had a lot of time to think about that. I never fully realized it until I left just how much I was trying to change you. It was wrong of me."

Logan shrugged. "Yes and no. I know you were only trying to help but sometimes you set the bar so high that I couldn't help but feel like a failure when I didn't reach it."

She looked at him with sad eyes. "I never meant for that to happen."

"I know." He nodded. "I do like to think I have my company because of you."

Veronica stared at him curiously. "Why's that?"

"I knew your intentions were good, Veronica. Quite frankly I think you still believed in me and had faith in me when no one else did."

She gave him a knowing smile. "You still kept that belief even after I told you I wanted you out of my life forever?"

"Well, then it became tougher but I still thought that maybe you still felt that way."

"I'd never stop."

"And because of that, I knew I could do whatever I set my mind to. I could get out of the shadow of my dad."

"I'm glad you were able to do that."

"Can't say that I haven't had obstacles that haven't tried to put me right back in the middle of it."

"It's hard I know."

"But that's life." Logan cracked a smile.

Veronica picked a clue from the way he said that he didn't want to talk about it anymore. "What else about the letters?"

"You still don't quote near as good I do."

Veronica faked being hurt. "That crushes me, Logan. But I can see your point. I mean that quote I included in that Christmas letter last year was kind over the top."

"Hey!"

"Oh I'm sorry; I guess that was your quote wasn't it?" Veronica smirked. "It was never a contest though you know." She reminded him. "I just got to thinking about some of the quotes you always had on your voicemail and I got to looking at some of them on this website and there were a lot of good ones. So what, did you not like them?"

"No, they were great. Kind of surprising to see them is all." He took another bite of his pizza.

They ate quietly for a few minutes. "So you found your mom?"

Veronica groaned. "Yeah, I almost wish I hadn't. It was a lost cause."

Logan sat quietly and listened to her talk.

"God forbid the woman actually cares about the fact that my dad is dying."

"Now you don't know that for sure…"

"Yes, I do." She whispered. "I mean, let's face it, Logan. He's been battling this for over two years and the prognosis isn't getting any better. I've tried to stay optimistic but it's getting really hard to."

"I'm sure it is."

"It was surreal. I was sitting there with her and she couldn't even look at me. She told me how she was sorry to hear that he was sick and she wished dad the best but that was it."

"How long had it been since the last time you had seen her?"

"The last time in person? The end of junior year."

Logan's eyebrows furrowed. "What do you mean in person? What other way have you seen her?"

"Oh, well the morning of our graduation I had a dream about her."

"Really?"

"Yeah. It was like my old life."

"Your old life?"

Veronica gave him a knowing smile. "Yes, Logan my old life. In other words Lilly was still alive."

Logan nodded then. "OK."

"Yeah." Veronica slowly nodded. "My parents were still blissfully married, Lilly was alive and at Vassar. Duncan was there and amazingly Dick was graduating too."

She stopped then.

"What?"

"And we were together."

"We were together?" Logan raised an amused eyebrow.

Veronica slowly nodded again. "Yeah we were together. As a couple."

"Really?" He paused for a moment. "Lilly was alive?"

Veronica was unsure of him questioning it meant he didn't think that they would be together if she was alive. "Oh yeah she was very much alive and moved on from guys."

"Meaning?"

Veronica rolled her eyes. "What do you think that means?"

"I guess I wouldn't be surprised. She always was adventurous."

"Yeah she was." Veronica slowly exhaled. "Wow! We went off on a tangent there."

"Yeah we did. So back to your mom. Did you tell your dad that you tracked her down and saw her?"

Veronica shook her head. "Nope. I never told him when I tracked her down when I was in high school either. I think it's better if he doesn't know. Especially with how she reacted." She sighed. "You should have seen her, Logan. She's withered down to nothing. I honestly think she's turned to drugs now too. Something tells me I just may lose her soon too."

"Veronica…"

"No, I know. I have no proof of that but without help I think she's going to overdose or die from alcohol poisoning. I want to help her, Logan. I think I should but…"

"Veronica, I know you're torn but it's not like you haven't tried to help her before. You got her into rehab and she didn't bother completing it. I think it's sweet that you want to but it's like you said in your letter; if she wants the help, she'll have to get it herself this time."

She just nodded.

"She shouldn't be afraid to get help or at least ask for help."

"Sometimes it's harder than you think."

"I know." He nodded. "That's why I'm bringing it up to you."

She stared at him confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Veronica, no one expects you to try to deal with your dad's cancer alone. You kind of give basic generic answers when we ask how things are going. It's fine you do but we also know you're holding back."

Veronica sat and looked at him in silence. She wasn't sure how to respond to that revelation.

"You have up this tough exterior so that people can't tell what you're really feeling. But I know you Veronica."

She watched him.

"Quite frankly even with the time that's passed I still think I'm the one who knows you best."

"I won't argue with that." She murmured quietly.

Logan gave a sad smile. "I know it's hard for you. I know you have to be scared. It's understandable that you would be. You need to remember though you do have friends who are there for you whenever you need us."

She smiled at him. "Including you?"

Logan returned the grin. "Especially me."

"Thank you Logan."

"You're welcome."

The phone rang then. Veronica picked it up on the 2nd ring. "Mars Investigations." She paused for a second. "Hi dad. Yeah. Yep, he did." She smiled at Logan. "We're just eating pizza right now and talking. Are you OK? Well, I worry. I'm allowed to, you know."

Logan chuckled.

"OK. I'll be home later. Love you too." She hung up then cleared her voice. "He just wanted to know if you found me."

"Yep, I did."

She smiled. It was nice. Talking with him like this. It made her feel more at peace now that he was aware of how she felt. It was also nice to know that he felt the same way about her. She noticed his expression being apprehensive then. "What's wrong?"

"I'm really sorry Madison did that to you. Made you feel that way."

"It was just her natural charm." She retorted.

"I am sorry about everything that happened with her…"

She cut him off then. "Logan stop."

He did.

"Stop apologizing for it. It's in the past. It's time to move on."

"It was interesting hearing you say that. So my only question to you then would be can you really do that?"

"I have to." She told him as she took a drink of her beer. "It was something that was holding me back; dragging me down."

Logan quietly nodded.

"Can't run away anymore. It doesn't solve anything."

"True. It never solves anything."

"I spent a lot of time thinking about that."

Logan frowned. "About Madison?"

Veronica shook her head. "No. About just how much I ran away. It took me a long time to trace it back to when it all started."

"Well, I'm sure that Lilly's death and seeing her lying by the pool had to be very traumatic."

"It was." She nodded. "It was my gut instinct to run away and from then on, it just became natural. When things got rough or I started to feel…"

"Overwhelmed?" Logan guessed.

"Right." She grinned.

"I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that you think I overwhelm you."

"There are different types of being overwhelmed, Logan. It was never a bad kind. It's not as ridiculous as it seems."

"Now I never said it was ridiculous."

"No, you just don't think it's possible."

"I'm sure it is." He assured her. "I'm just trying to think whether or not there has ever been anything that could possibly make me feel like that."

"I can think of one thing." She volunteered.

Logan glanced over at her. "Hmm…what's that?"

"Your mom."

Logan thought about that for a moment. That was true. "Yeah I haven't thought about it like that before but yeah."

"Still think about her a lot?"

"Sometimes." He admitted. "More around her birthday and the day she died. But I still think about her on my birthday too."

"Well, that's pretty normal."

"Nothing about my family is normal."

"Is that including your sister?" Veronica smirked.

Logan groaned. "Don't get me started on Trina."

""Everything OK? Did something happen?"

"Oh, she's fine. Pregnant and engaged but fine."

"Well, that's great!" She exclaimed. Then she noticed Logan's expression. "Isn't it?"

"I don't know. I'd really like to believe it'll work out for her but…"

"But…"

"But she never learns." Logan grumbled. "I mean her first marriage lasted just over 2 months."

"She's already been married?"

"Yeah, that was a joke." He retorted. "I really would love to have more faith in these guys but you know, after that Dylan guy who beat her…"

"And your dad equally beat him." She noted.

"True but she got lucky then. Now with her in New York, I rarely see her and therefore I don't have the ability to protect her."

"She's a big girl, Logan. She has to know how to fend for herself."

"Yeah, that's the thing. She tries to do that to prove me wrong and then when I'm right she blames me."

"Have to love your sister." Veronica teased.

"Yeah so anyway, she's getting married in Jamaica in March."

"Are you going to go?"

Logan sighed. "I've been debating that all day. I don't think so. I mean I'd love to go back to Jamaica. I haven't been there in over 10 years but I have no desire to see Trina screw up her life."

Veronica bit her lip. She wanted to say something but decided against it.

Logan caught the way she was looking and smirked. "OK let's hear it."

"What?"

"I know you, Veronica. I know you want to say something. Go ahead."

"No, I'm not going to."

Logan raised an eyebrow at that.

"There's been a lot of time that's passed and you know better than me as far as whether or not it would be worth it."

Logan was rather impressed. Of course he would have listened to any advice she gave. He wasn't sure whether or not he would have taken it but still.

"If you want my advice, you'll ask me for it. Until then, I'm Switzerland."

Logan chuckled.

Veronica had been waiting to ask this question. She was surprised he hadn't brought it up yet."So um…you know speaking of marriage and weddings, I'm surprised you haven't said anything about what I wrote about us and the fact that I had thought about us getting married."

"Yeah." He told her quietly and nodded. "Still trying to process that one."

"Why?" Her eyes narrowed skeptically.

"I never would have guessed that."

"Really?"

"Yeah." He paused for a moment. "I wasn't sure if you had ever thought about marriage. That was good to know though. So you had thought about us getting married?"

She stared at him for a moment as she drank her beer. She finally responded. "Yeah. Yeah of course I had. The bigger question though is did you?"

He glanced at her. He hesitated before answering. "Do you really want to know?"

Veronica's expression fell and Logan gave her a knowing smile. "No, that wasn't a no, Veronica."

Her face cleared then.

"But there's something you should know. I've been kind of reluctant to mention it because I'm not sure how you're going to react to this."

"What?"

"Okay." He sighed. "So do you remember the night we broke up the last time? That big fancy date I had planned but of course never happened?"

"Yeah." She said slowly.

"I was going to propose that night."

Veronica felt like she wanted to start crying. If she wasn't already sitting down she would have fell down. "What?"

"Yeah. So yeah Veronica, I have. I used to think about it a lot too. Ever since we became a couple, you're the only one I could ever picture myself marrying."

"Are you trying to kill me?"

Logan raised a curious eyebrow as he drank his beer. "Oh, you mean like you did to me when you told me that?"

"OK fair enough." She told him as she ate another piece of pizza. She kept her head down.

Logan bit his lip. Yeah, he knew that revelation might be overwhelming to her. He wasn't 100% sure how she was going to react to it. Her quietness was expected. "OK so where's your mind at, Mars?"

"It's…" She looked at him. "Never mind."

Logan groaned. "You can't keep doing this, Veronica."

"Keep doing what?" She frowned.

"Running away."

Veronica looked down at herself to see that she was still sitting down. "I'm not running away."

"Yeah not physically but verbally you are." Logan informed her.

Veronica opened her mouth to refute this but she quickly closed it once she realized that he was right.

"I'm not sure why you keep holding back or what you're so afraid to tell me but I can handle it."

"I'm not sure I can handle hearing your answer." She told him quietly.

"Veronica, come on." He coaxed.

"You know, trying to force me to say this isn't helping matters."

"I'm trying to get us back to point where we are being completely honest with each other here."

"Cause it worked out so well last time." She retorted.

"Veronica!"

"What?"

"This is the way that's going to lead us back to each other. We're going to need to be honest with each other if we're going to be together."

Veronica stared at him.

"I want us back together, Veronica. Do you?"

"Yeah." She slowly nodded. "Yeah, of course I do."

"So just say whatever you were going to say."

She took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled. "So you said you thought about it a lot back then."

Logan thought for a moment and then realized she was still on the marriage thing. "Yeah. Yeah I did."

"So what about now?"

"Now? Meaning?"

"Meaning, do you still think about it?"

"Yeah." He didn't hesitate with that admission. "Of course I still want to marry you someday, Veronica."

She took an internal sigh of relief. The look registered on her face.

"Seriously? That's what you were worried about?"

"Things change, Logan."

"But I already told you things don't change that much. Don't you remember that morning a few days ago when we woke up in the hotel room? I told you. I've known since I was 17 years old that it was you I was supposed to be with. I've never lost sight of that."

She nodded.

"I never lost that faith, Veronica. I had to wonder if you felt the same way. Now I don't have to worry about that. If you had lost that idea, you wouldn't have written me 50 some letters."

Veronica grinned.

"I always knew we would wind up back together. When was the biggest question."

"And when are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking now."

"Really?"

"Yeah I am but we need to be honest with each other. We have to tell each other what we expect so that way we don't get the crazy notion of getting ridiculous expectations."

"Is that just aimed at me?"

"Yes." He teased.

Veronica gave him a knowing smile. "OK, here's what I expect. You have to let me do my job as I see fit."

Logan's expression went bland.

"I know you probably don't like to hear it but it's the truth. Yes, the job is risky. It will always be. If I've survived being in the FBI for 7 years and I'm not dead yet that I must be doing something right."

Logan cracked a smile.

"I've been shot at, been tied up and had a knife to my throat. I've survived it all, Logan."

"Veronica…" He started to say.

"I told you that you probably wouldn't like to hear it. My point is I know what I'm doing. I've had the best training I could possibly have. Yes, I'll understand you being scared. You have a right to be but I need you to trust me enough to know that I know what I'm doing. I've never gotten myself into a situation that I couldn't get myself out of."

Marked words, Logan internally groaned. "And if that day comes?"

"Well, that's what my muscle is for." Her eyes twinkled.

Logan grinned. "Yeah, very interesting meeting your new partner."

She nodded. "Alex is a really nice guy."

"Seems like it. So why didn't you tell me that you weren't working for your dad anymore?"

Veronica shrugged. "I don't know. It hasn't been all that long ago that it happened. Just since I got the new office." She glanced around. "So what do you think of it?"

"It's really nice." Logan looked around. "It's really big too."

"Yeah. It was about a week after I came home that I called Alex to make him an offer to come help me out. He took a week to decide and within two weeks, he came with his family in tow."

"So he's married?"

She nodded. "Yeah, his wife's name is Lizzie. He's got two little girls too. They are all really nice." She looked at him curiously. "What's that look for?"

"Nothing."

"Something tells me while you were eavesdropping on my conversation with him you were wondering if I was involved with him."

Logan just glanced at her.

"Weren't you?"

He sighed. "Well, the thought had crossed my mind."

"He's a married man though. I wouldn't dare try to go there."

"Well, this was before I heard you talk about his wife."

"He is a really nice guy. He was my partner for a year and a half. I had a different partner last year though. I kept in touch with Alex when I could."

"That's good." He thought for a moment then said. "OK. As long as you keep me in the loop I won't worry."

"Now you know I can't tell you about clients."

"I'm not looking for information about your clients. Just when things could get crazy, I would just like the heads up."

"OK. I can do that."

Logan grinned. "Good now here's what I would expect. You need to stop all versions of running away."

"Logan…"

"Hey, I let you talk now you let me talk."

Veronica resigned. "OK. Go ahead."

"I realize it's your fall back. It's natural. It may take some time to get used to it but when you feel like you want to run away, I want you to stop, take a second and think of a different way to handle it. I would encourage you call me but it's going to be up to you."

Veronica raised an eyebrow. "Even if that's at 3 o'clock in the morning?"

"Anytime, Veronica."

"You just may regret saying that." She told him casually.

"No, I won't. I'm always here for you, Veronica. You know that. I know you question it and I'm thinking it's because of your mom but I'm not leaving you."

"Thank you, Logan. I appreciate you saying that."

"You're welcome."

"OK so there's something else that's really important to me. Something that's true to who you are and the way you handle things and that's going to need to be adjusted."

"OK." He said slowly. "Like what?"

"Like…you need to stop and think about your reaction to things."

"OK I need an example here."

Veronica sighed. "Like when you saw that 'sex tape'" She air quoted sex tape. "With me and Piz and your initial gut reaction was to beat the living crap out of him when he had nothing to do with it."

Logan sighed then. "OK."

"I realize that you love to make people pay…"

"I really don't do that anymore, Veronica."

She glanced at him. "I really hope so, Logan. I would like to think that in 7 years that had changed."

"It has. It took awhile, I will admit but it took you moving away to make me see it's not worth it."

"It's because I moved away that you stopped doing that?"

Logan smirked. "No, it took me awhile to do this remember? I mean it took you saying that I was out of your life forever and then literally leaving for me to take a hard look at the way I react to things and see what causes it."

"And what did you come up with?"

He gave her a knowing smile and she nodded. "Yeah, I think he would have a lot to do with it."

"My dad never took the time to think before he beat the living shit out of me so naturally that would be where I would get my thinking."

Veronica leaned across her desk and grabbed his hand. Logan looked down at the gesture and threaded their fingers together. "You're not your dad, Logan. You never have been. You have a soul."

He gave her a small smile.

"You didn't deserve the abuse you went through with him. And you know that you would never put your kids through that kind of hell."

Logan glanced at her curiously. Kids? Who said anything about kids?

Veronica backtracked. "My point was, you know not to pick on little defenseless kids.

"You're the opposite of your father, Logan. You'd never cheat. You're a serial monogamist as Lilly likes to call you."

He stared at her curiously."She said that?"

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, she has and it's not like she's lying. I know this. I've known this since high school."

Logan couldn't hold in a grin.

"You've never cheated."

"I never felt the thrill of it like many people have." He admitted. "I'd get nothing out of it. I think it's because living my life I've seen what infidelity can destroy."

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, I haven't went through what you have with your parents but I have seen a version of it too with my own. It destroys everything."

Logan solemnly nodded. "Yeah, I saw it with them." He then added. "But I'm not just talking about that. I'm talking about me too."

She slowly nodded. "Ahh…true. You had lived it. Between Caitlin and Lilly, I'm sure you had."

"There was one other one after you left but yeah, I've had too many brushes with it to get any kind of enjoyment out of it."

"She was a slut." Veronica stated and Logan's eyes grew wide.

She held back a chuckle. "Caitlin. Caitlin was a slut. Hell she still is one. I'd never call Lilly a slut and you know it."

"Pretty judgmental aren't you?"

"I'm sorry; you're going to contradict me on that?"

Logan sighed. "No."

Veronica smirked. "Although from what I've heard and seen on the internet, she sure went on to have a stellar career in porn."

"You watched her in a porn movie?" Logan raised a curious eyebrow.

"No but I did see about 5 minutes of the sex tape she released that launched the porn career."

"You did?"

"Uhh…yeah. I wanted to make sure it wasn't with you."

"No, I didn't make a sex tape with Caitlin Ford."

"I quickly found that out and stopped watching."

"What in the world would make you think I would?"

"Never know."

"You think that I would want to have the world watch me have sex? Especially after what happened with my dad?"

"First of all, luckily because you were smart, the world never saw his sex tapes with Lilly and two, this would have happened before it was even known that there were sex tapes."

"True."

Veronica polished off her beer then and looked at him. "So let me ask you something."

"Shoot."

"Did reading the letters really change your mind about where we stand?"

He looked at her curious. "Meaning what?"

"Well you said you were thinking now as far as us getting back together."

"Yeah…"

"Was it really reading the letters that changed your mind on that? A few days ago, we were just trying to get back to being friends."

"I was going off of what you wanted. If it's still what you want, if you want to wait, we can. I don't want to rush things."

"I know." She nodded. "It never works out."

"The questions that have been sitting in the back of my head for years now finally have answers to them, thanks to the letters."

"Good. I'm glad they helped."

"So…you want to start dating again?"

"Nah, let's just jump right into the sex part." Veronica teased.

"Well, you never know. The way you make it sound, it's been quite awhile for you."

"And it has." She admitted as she rose to go over to him. "But after awhile, you stop missing it."

"Oh, that is just plain wrong!" Logan informed her as he pulled her into his lap.

"Wrong but truthful. As for the original question…yeah we can but I still think we should take things slow. I want to do things right this time."

"I know…" He nodded. "So do I."

"This time will be different, Logan." She concluded.

"This time will be for infinity." He told her as he kissed her.

* * *

**It wasn't exactly how I envisioned ending this chapter ultimately it was good enough. So...where do we pick up? Thanksgiving? Before Thanksgiving? Have any ideas let me know. I'd figure around a month before I get the next chapter out. I'm updating other stories and my Gossip Girl story has suffered the most by not updating for over 5 months now. I may get out a chapter sooner here but that's a tentative deadline for you. Anyway, please review. I love to read them.**

**(A/N 10-20-12) OK so I decided to go back in and add the author's note here. After getting so little reviews for this chapter and I do appreciate the ones I got and the people who have favorited and put me on a story alert, I decided that this story is going on the back burner for awhile. I'm still going to update but it's not going to be the 1st story. I have 5 other stories I've been neglecting and I think I'll update them for awhile before I come back to this one. Besides, I have a new V/L story and a sequel to Sinful (the original V/L I wrote) to write. I do appreciate everyone who has alerted and the ones that have reviewed but going from 14 reviews on the last chapter to 3 was kind of an eye opener and I feel that I need to focus on my other stories I've been neglecting for several months. I'll update when I get a chance to. **


	7. Unresolved Issues

**Wow! So it's been a little over a month and half. I appreciate everyone being so patient. I got the other two stories started and also updated another one. This story has been the bane of my existence for the last week. The last week alone I wrote probably close to 8000 words. It's a superlong chapter though just shy of the letters chapter in this story. I ended up taking this chapter a completely different way than I had originally thought I would. You can definitely call it unresolved issues though. Please review and let me know what you thought! I'd really like to know. Oh and thank you for all the prior reviews. I know I didn't respond to probably most of them and I apologize. I'll try to do better this time and reply to all of them.**

* * *

Logan sat down in front of Lilly's grave. He sighed as he thought about the night before. Well, yesterday in general.

"You look worried, Logan." Lilly's voice startled him. "Why do you look so worried?"

"I wouldn't say worried." He shrugged. "Just confused."

"About what?"

"Veronica's letters."

"What about Veronica's letters?"

"Did you know about them?"

"Yeah, I knew she had written a couple of them." Lilly admitted.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Lilly laughed, which made Logan smile. It had been 10 years since the last time he heard it. "Come on, Logan. You just saw me for the 1st time in 10 years just a few days ago. Would you really have believed me if I had told you that?"

Logan thought for a moment. He sighed. "Probably not."

"You wouldn't." Lilly confirmed. "Besides it wasn't my place to tell. And that's exactly why I never told Veronica that you had planned to propose to her or that you even went to see her when she was in Quantico."

"You knew about that?"

"Let's just say I checked up on you every once in awhile."

Logan smirked. "Oh, so you think you can be a stalker now that you're an angel?"

"I wouldn't phrase it that way. I just like to keep watch on all the people I love."

Logan cracked a smile.

"Come on Logan. Tell me what it was about the letters that has you confused."

"It was a lot of information to get in one day." He admitted.

"I'm sure it was." Lilly nodded. "What was surprising?"

"She told me I was her first love, Lilly."

"Yeah, I know." Lilly nodded. "What, you think she's lying?"

"Well, I'm doubtful. She was with Duncan for like 2 years…"

"Logan…she already explained about her and Duncan. Quite frankly I'm sure you weren't in love with me…"

"What? Of course I was!" He protested.

Lilly groaned. "Can I finish my sentence please?"

"Sorry. Go ahead."

"As I was going to say, I'm sure you weren't in love with me the way that you were…" Lilly caught herself. "Are…" She emphasized. "in love with her."

"I…" He stopped for a moment and thought about it.

"I don't expect you to admit to this Logan but I always knew you were in love with Veronica."

"What?" Logan's eyes grew wide.

"Yeah. I did. I was very keen to those things. Then again it didn't take a genius to catch on to it. You didn't exactly hide it well."

"Lilly, what the hell are you talking about?"

"Did you think that I forgot that question that I asked about what you thought of Veronica the first time you saw her? You thought she was hot."

"Yeah, we were 12 though. I had a different version of hot back then."

"You used to watch her…a lot actually. You were always protecting her."

"I was just trying to be a good friend. A good friend does those things, Lilly." He pointed out.

"Yeah, they do but you held her to different standards. I was the naughty vixen and she was the perfect virginal princess."

Logan was quiet. _Did I really do that?_ He thought.

"Although you found out soon after I died that she wasn't perfect or a princess. Veronica was a fighter."

"A badass fighter." Logan corrected her. "She still is really."

"Yeah, she had to be to put up with your crap. She weathered that storm all by herself."

"She was a lot tougher than I thought." He held back.

"What?"

"She's a lot more vulnerable than I thought too."

"She hides it well." Lilly admitted.

"The things she told me, I would have never imagined her saying."

"I think that's a little bit of an exaggeration, Logan."

"No, it's not, Lilly. When it came to her parents or should I say her mom, Veronica never let it show how much it bothered her how things happened. Especially with your dad."

"I am surprised you never mentioned to her that you knew."

Logan shrugged. "Like you said earlier, it wasn't my place to tell her that. Besides, at the time, I was doubtful that she would believe me."

Lilly just nodded.

"Then even when she was talking about you…" He drifted off as he glanced over at her. "I never would have guessed the real reason she always ran away."

"But now that you thought about it…"

"Yeah, I can see it now." Logan nodded. "I have all the answers I have been waiting for; it's just a shame it took 7 years for me to get them." He sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. "When I think of all the time that's been lost…"

Lilly stared at him, confused. "Logan, why are you looking at it like that?"

"Like what?"

"Lost time. That's such a negative way to look at it."

"And just how do you think I should be looking at it?"

"Logan, you and Veronica have really grown up these past 7 years. I don't mean physically; yes you're 7 years older but that's not what I mean. You two have had time to reflect on everything. This was especially true of her. She had some time; time away from here and the chaos that Neptune was."

"Still is." He smirked and she laughed.

"Fine; still is. Anyway, it took her moving away, getting her priorities straight and spending some time really thinking about what went wrong."

"That she did." Logan agreed. "Fifty-some letters later."

"Well, when she thought you were taken…"

"But I wasn't." Logan felt like he had said that for the hundredth time.

"Regardless. When she thought you were, it gave her a jolt and it made her think, 'Wow, that really was the end.'"

"There's never an end to us." He told her quietly.

"Again, she didn't know that. When you take things at face value, it can have a positive or a negative effect. In this case…it actually had both."

Logan's eyebrows furrowed. "How do you figure that?"

"The negative could be her thinking you were taken…"

Logan started to open his mouth and Lilly threw a look at him so he quickly shut it.

"And the positive could be her finally taking a long hard look at the past. I think that you guys talking about things really helped."

"I think it did too." He paused for a moment. "I finally got to hear her say it."

"Logan, you knew it. You knew in your heart that she loves you."

"Yeah, I know it now. But there was part of me back then that always made me wonder. I mean, sure she said yes when I asked but finally hearing her say the actual words…"

Lilly smiled. "Felt great?" She filled in.

"Felt amazing actually."

Lilly smiled.

"And to know that she still feels the same way now, makes it even more amazing."

"I am happy for you both, Logan. You deserve it. Especially after everything that you've been through together you deserve your happy ending."

"Thank you, Lilly. I appreciate you saying that."

"So where does this leave you two?"

Logan sighed. "Dating again. Going slow."

"Think you're both ready for that?"

Logan frowned. "What does that mean?"

"I mean, I think it's great that you're back together but ask yourself, are you really going to be able to let all your problems you had before not affect your relationship this time around?"

"Like?"

"Like how you didn't like how dangerous her job was. She's not changing careers for you, Logan. Are you prepared to face the reality of the job this time around?"

"Now is different." He claimed.

"And how is it different?"

"Well, first of all, she has Alex."

"Yeah, he's hot." Lilly commented dreamily.

Logan groaned. "There would be so many problems with that including the fact that you are dead."

"Second of all…" She trailed off.

"Second of all, she's been in the FBI for 7 years. She's survived a hell of a lot."

"Yeah, that was what she told you for her reasoning."

"So?"

"So…the point is, are you going to be able to understand it?"

Logan hesitated for a second too long. "Yeah of course."

Lilly sighed.

"What?"

"I really hope that's true, Logan." She told him quietly. "Really hope that's true."

* * *

Meanwhile, at Mars Investigations, Veronica was working on one of her cases when her phone rang. "Mars Investigations."

"Hey." It was Logan.

"Oh hey." A smile was instantly plastered on her face. "How was your day?"

"Good…good. Yours?"

"Good. Getting hungry?"

"Famished." Logan admitted. "Want to meet me at Luigi's in half an hour?"

"Can't wait." Veronica told him. He could tell she was smiling just by the sound of her voice.

"Great. I'll see you there." Logan paused for a moment. "I love you."

"I love you too. See you soon." Veronica hung up the phone and started humming to herself. She was in her own little world until she heard a knock on her door. "Come in." She called out as she reviewed the papers in front of her.

The door quietly opened and there stood a dark figure in the doorway. "Hi."

Veronica froze in her seat. She knew that voice. She slowly looked up. "Oh my god. Duncan."

* * *

Logan arrived a few minutes late to the restaurant and was surprised that Veronica wasn't there. She was known for being punctual. Well, most of the time. Sometimes she was even early. He decided to wait to order until she got there.

When she still hadn't showed after 15 minutes, he tried to call. She must have hit ignore because it went straight to voicemail. He then sent a text and she responded with that she was in a business consult. Logan sighed. _And so it starts_, he realized. Rather than waiting at the restaurant, he decided to wait at her office until she was done. He would just wait in the waiting area; maybe talk to Alex if he was there. As soon as he arrived at the office, he had found it empty. Veronica's door was closed but he could hear muffled voices inside the office.

Ten minutes later, the door opened a crack and Logan could hear Veronica's voice. She seemed hesitant.

"I…I'll see what I can find out, OK? For now, you need to lay extremely low."

"OK. Thanks Veronica." Duncan stepped out, his back to Logan. He closed the door then spun around. Logan's eyes grew wide. "Duncan?"

"Logan?"

* * *

Veronica thought her eyes were deceiving her. "Duncan? Is that really you?"

Duncan smiled. He hadn't changed much. He had his hair a darker brown and he also was sporting a mustache. "Yeah, it's really me. How have you been Veronica?"

"Umm…fine. Good. Duncan what the hell are you doing here?"

"I need your help."

"Duncan you shouldn't be here. You can get in so much trouble. You'll wind up going to jail."

"Which is why I need your help." Duncan took a seat in front of her desk. Veronica rose from her desk and peeked out into the waiting room. The room was empty. She closed the door and returned to her desk.

Veronica sighed. "Help with what?"

"I need you to dig up whatever dirt you can find on the Mannings."

"Where's Lilly?" She asked as her phone began to ring. She looked down and saw it was Logan. She hit the ignore button.

"She's with my parents in Napa right now." Duncan admitted. "Look Veronica, I'm tired of running. I don't want to do it anymore. I want to raise Lilly here but I need your help to put the Mannings in their place."

Veronica's phone beeped then. She glanced at the message and replied to Logan she was in a business consult.

"Important?" Duncan raised an eyebrow.

"Sort of." She shrugged. "It will wait a little bit." She wasn't ready to tell him it was Logan though.

"You're the only one I trust, Veronica. It's time to end this once and for all. Please?" Duncan's eyes flashed desperation.

"OK." She slowly nodded. "I'll see what I can do, OK?"

"Oh thanks Veronica. I knew I could count on you! Really. You have no idea how much this means to me." He rose from his seat as she rose from hers. He came around and gave her a hug. The gesture surprised Veronica.

Duncan started to head for the door. As he opened it, he heard her say. "I…I'll see what I can find out. For now, you need to lay extremely low."

Duncan nodded that he would as he left. He closed the door and found his old best friend standing there. "Logan?"

"Duncan?"

Duncan nodded. "Yeah. Hey!" He gave Logan a manly albeit awkward hug.

"Hey! So what are you doing here?"

"I…moved back."

One of Logan's eyebrows shot up in surprise.

Duncan gave a sheepish grin. "Yeah, recent development. Just got back a couple days ago."

"Where's Lilly?"

"She's with my parents in Napa right now."

"Aren't you taking a huge risk coming back?"

Duncan sighed. "It's true but I'm tired of running. It's not the life I want for my daughter. I decided to move back here. That's why I'm here. I'm having Veronica find out whatever she can on the Mannings so I have some leverage for a court battle."

Logan's face remained neutral. Well, as neutral as it could given this information. "Really? Veronica took the case?"

"Well, she's the only I trust, Logan. She made a promise to Meg before Meg died that she wouldn't let her parents take Lilly away from me. Truthfully, I am a little surprised she took it but I'm also relieved she did."

"I'm sure." Logan commented.

Duncan scanned the waiting room. "So what are you doing here?"

"Just needed to talk to Veronica."

"Ahh…well, hopefully we can catch up more soon. I'll be sticking close to home for right now though. Hopefully soon though."

Logan plastered on a polite smile. "Yeah, sounds good."

"OK, talk to you later Logan."

"See ya, DK."

* * *

When the front door closed, Logan knocked on Veronica's door. "Yeah." She called out.

Logan opened it and gave her an uneasy smile.

"Oh hey, I'm sorry. I just got done with my consult."

"I know; I just ran into him out here."

Veronica bit her lip. "Really?"

"Really. So you're taking Duncan's case?"

Veronica sighed. "Yes, I told him I would."

"Veronica…"

"Logan…this is not 8 years ago, OK?" She informed him. "I have no intention of replaying senior year here, OK? I'm just doing this so Duncan will be able to keep Lilly."

Logan was quiet.

"I love you." She reminded him. "You know that."

"Yeah, I do."

"We are different people now. I would like to believe that we have all grown up since the last time we were all in Neptune.

Making sure that Lilly stays with Duncan is important to me. I made a promise to Meg."

"I know; Duncan said that."

"OK, so…yes I'm taking the case. It's not going to change us. I won't let it."

"Nice to know."

"Logan…" Her eyes narrowed on him.

"No, I realize that it was important to Meg. I know how important it is that Lilly stays with Duncan too. From the sound of it, Meg's parents looked to be about dead even with my dad in the parenting department."

"Yeah, that's true. They were more emotionally and psychologically abusive though." When she caught Logan's reaction she quickly added. "Not that that's any better. It's just as bad as physical abuse. It's never OK to abuse anyone, especially a child."

"It took me a long time to overcome it."

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure it did. I wouldn't be surprised if Lizzie and Grace are still overcoming it. Especially Grace."

"I know how important it is." He repeated. "I just wish it wasn't Duncan."

"It's time to start putting some trust in me." She told him bluntly. "Do you trust me?"

Logan glanced at her. "Yes. Of course I do."

"Good." She nodded. "OK, so I want to get out of here right now. Still hungry?"

"Of course."

"Let's go eat then."

He drove them to Luigi's and they had a relatively quiet supper. There was one call from Alex to follow up on a prior case but otherwise it was peace and quiet. And the subject of Duncan and Lilly wasn't mentioned the rest of the night.

It was after 9 when Logan returned to Veronica to Mars Investigations. She had to pick up some paperwork before she headed home for the night. He parked his Range Rover right next to her Saturn.

He was being very polite and went around and opened the passenger door for her.

"Such a gentleman." She grinned.

"I try." He smirked as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

"Better go in. I need to get that paperwork then need to get home to dad."

"OK." He told her as he leaned down and kissed her. Logan almost moved away but Veronica stopped him. Logan wasn't going to fight her. Her arms went around his neck and kept him close as her mouth opened and his tongue danced around with hers. Veronica moaned as she leaned into him. This is what she had been missing. She missed being kissed like this by him. She loved being close to him again.

They finally came up for air a couple minutes later. "Wow!" Veronica panted.

"Yeah, I'll second that." Logan chuckled. "I've missed doing that."

"Yeah I've missed it too." She kissed him again. "I've missed the heat."

"I have too."

"You realize that we've had even more heat at other activities."

Logan laughed.

"What?"

"We've been together like what, 24 hours and you're already trying to get me into bed."

"Logan…"

"It really has been a long time since you've gotten laid, hasn't it?"

"Logan!" Veronica gasped. "You don't have to announce that to the whole street."

Logan laughed again as he kissed her. "Well, honestly, I would be lying if I told you I wasn't tempted by the offer especially since it's been a little while for me too."

"Oh really?"

"Well, not near as long as it has been for you but yeah."

"But…"

"But…I think it would be wise to wait for now."

"Logan Echolls wants to wait?" Veronica raised a curious eyebrow.

"Hey, don't pose that as a question." He scoffed. "If you remember back to junior year we did. Then again maybe your memory isn't nearly as good as mine." He teased and she slugged him.

"Excuse me who wrote you a lot of letters reminiscing about the past?"

"OK true. I just think that we should maybe pace ourselves."

"OK." She nodded. She glanced down at her watch. It was almost 9:30. They have been outside her office for almost half an hour. "Better go." She gave him another kiss. "I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"OK. Bye, Veronica. I love you."

Veronica grinned. "I love you too, Logan." She gave him a final kiss then headed into her office.

* * *

The next morning started at 10 o'clock for Veronica. She normally at work by 8 but she decided to sleep in a little longer. Hey, she was the boss after all. Besides, if something was desperately important, Alex would let her know. She stopped by Manny's Flower Hut and picked 2 bouquets of pink calla lilies and headed to the cemetery. She parked by Lilly's grave and put one of the bouquets down in front of the headstone.

She took a seat in front of it and sighed heavily.

"Uh-oh."

"What?" Veronica said as she stared at the headstone.

"Why aren't you happy, Veronica?"

Veronica glanced over at her dead best friend. "Your brother is back in town."

"Yeah, I know." She nodded. "And my namesake is with him."

Veronica cracked a smile. "Have you seen her?"

"Yeah, she's beautiful…just like her aunt." Lilly batted her eyelashes at Veronica and Veronica laughed.

"Come on Veronica. Tell me what's going on?"

"Well, he wants me to dig up information on the Mannings. He wants to raise Lilly here and not have to worry that they're going to take her away from him."

"And…you took the case." It was a statement, not a question.

"I did." Veronica nodded.

Lilly smirked and Veronica threw her a knowing smile.

"Oh no the Lilly Kane smirk."

"The Lilly Kane smirk?" Lilly feigned hurt. "What does that mean?"

"That means that smirk tells me you're up to no good."

Lilly giggled.

"Tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking about Logan."

Veronica sighed.

"And apparently you are too. This is going to be interesting."

"What does that mean?" Veronica's eyes narrowed.

"That means that this is ultimately going to be a test."

Veronica's eyes narrowed. "A test? What does that mean?"

"You know, I love you two. I love you together. I think you're perfect. I think you're probably even soulmates…"

Veronica cracked a smile.

"That being said, I think you both overestimating just how easy this is going to be. It's not going to be a cakewalk."

"Are you looking into the future and telling me that? Did you know that Duncan was coming home? Did you know that and didn't tell me?"

Lilly groaned. "Veronica, you have such an overactive imagination. First of all, no, I'm not looking into the future. I can't see the future any more than you can. I know what you're both saying about taking things slow and I'm glad to hear that. It's smart. It's nice you talked about what you want to be different. They are all valid points."

"And your concern…"

"My concern is the follow-through…especially when it comes to Logan and your job."

"In general or because of Duncan?"

"Both."

"I told him I'm not changing my job for him. I can't do it and I won't do it."

"I know." Lilly nodded. "And that's smart. But you know Logan and jealousy…"

"He doesn't have a reason to be though." Veronica insisted.

"I know." She nodded again. "And deep down, he knows it too. Second of all, no I didn't know that Duncan was coming home but even if I did, I wasn't going to tell you."

Veronica scowled at that and Lilly laughed. "Veronica…I don't tell secrets. I think you and Logan think that since I'm dead I'll just tell you them as some form to give you an idea of what you should do."

Veronica was quiet.

"You two love reaching." Lilly commented. "Anyway, I'll tell you what I told him yesterday when he came and saw me…"

"He saw you yesterday?"

"Yeah, he was here. Anyway, I'll tell you what I told him. I told him that I am happy for you both. That you deserve it. Especially after everything that you've been through together you deserve your happy ending."

"Think we're going to get it?"

"I have no doubt you'll get it. Will it be smooth sailing? No. You will get it though."

Veronica sighed as she left Lilly's grave. This was the first time in a long time that she didn't feel at peace when she left. She felt extremely uncertain. God, this wasn't good.

She was about to get into her Saturn when she saw a vehicle pull up behind her. It was one she didn't recognize…until she saw Duncan get out of the driver's side.

"Hey Veronica."

"Duncan." Veronica nodded.

"What are you doing here?"

"I come up here from time to time and visit with Lilly." She admitted. "I tell her how things are going."

"Well, that's nice." Duncan cracked a smile. "I'm sure she appreciates the visits." He told her as he opened the passenger door and saw a little blonde haired girl get out of the car. Veronica smiled. She looked a lot like her aunt Lilly but she had a lot of Meg in her too. "Lilly, come here." Duncan took his daughter's hand and led her over to Veronica's car. "I want you to meet your aunt Veronica."

Veronica studied her for a few seconds. Her hair was a honey colored and halfway down her back. She was tall for being almost 9 years old. Her eyes were a pretty shade of blue-green and her skin was very fair. She really did look a lot like Lilly did at her age.

"Veronica, this is my daughter Lilly. Lilly, this is aunt Veronica."

Veronica smiled at the name. Technically at one point in time, her being an actual aunt to Lilly was a possibility. "It's nice to meet you, Lilly."

"Nice to meet you, aunt Veronica." The little girl said shyly.

"I'd stay longer but I need to get to work. I'll let you know if I find anything out."

"Thanks Veronica."

Veronica took off towards the middle of the cemetery and parked again. She reached for the other bouquet of flowers and headed to Meg's headstone. She glanced down at the headstone. God, this had been the first time she had been there since Meg was buried there.

She gently set the bouquet of flowers down beside the marble headstone that had Megan Olivia Manning scrolled on it.

"I'm so sorry, Meg." Veronica whispered. "I've been a horrible friend." She admitted. "I've been in this cemetery so many times to see Lilly but I never stopped to see you. I'm sorry I haven't until now."

Veronica glanced back up the hill and could see two shadowy figures which she knew were Duncan and his daughter.

Little tears formed in the corners of her eyes. "She's beautiful, Meg. She looks just like you." She admitted with a watery smile. "And Lilly."

She stood there quiet for a moment. She closed her eyes and slowly inhaled and exhaled. It was as if she was expecting Meg to be like Lilly and communicate with her from beyond the grave. The wind blew across her face which made Veronica smile.

"I promise I'm going to do everything in my power to keep Lilly with Duncan. I'll make sure that your parents can't hurt her. I'm not going to let you down, OK? I promise I won't."

Veronica then turned and headed to her office. She dove into her work as soon as she got there. Coming up with ammunition against the Mannings was extremely difficult. Stewart Manning was a prominent figure in Neptune….much like Jake Kane used to be. In the 09 circle Jake was still ahead of Stewart.

Veronica ran financials and a background check on each of Meg's parents. Nothing looked exceptionally helpful. Veronica sighed. She didn't really want to do this but if she had to, she was going to go to Lizzie. She was unsure about Grace. Grace was still living at home. She was a senior this year. That would be an absolute last resort. She is more than likely the one that had been hurt most by the abuse but given how she was still considered a dependent, she was reluctant to pursue it right now.

She heard a knock on her doorframe and she looked up. Alex gave her an encouraging smile. "Hey."

"Hey." She smiled back.

"How are things going? You look like you're a woman on a mission."

Veronica smirked. "You could say that." She nodded as she glanced down at her computer screen. "New case."

"Really? That's great. Who's it involve?"

Veronica glanced up and sighed. "Is there anyone out there?"

Alex looked at the waiting room and frowned. "No. Why?"

"OK." She nodded. "Come in and close the door."

Alex was still confused but he did as she requested. "OK, what's going on, V?"

"Well, you remember Logan?"

He gave her a knowing grin. "Kind of hard to forget considering that was just a couple nights ago."

"I've only dated two guys seriously: one was Logan and the other was…"

"Duncan Kane." Alex guessed.

"Right." She nodded.

"OK…still lost here. Is the case for one of the guys?"

"Yeah, Duncan came back a couple days ago to Neptune."

Alex's eyes grew wide. "Seriously? How long has it been?"

"Like eight years. His daughter will be 9 before too long." Veronica gave him an abbreviated explanation of what had happened senior year with Duncan…and she purposely left out about Logan and their tumultuous relationship back then.

"Wow! You never fail to amaze me, Mars."

Veronica smiled as she glanced down at her computer screen again. "You give me way too much credit, Meyers."

"Oh, I don't think so. So what are you going to need me to do?"

"Nothing at the immediate time. Why don't you head home and spend some time with your kids? I'm sure they've been missing you."

Alex shrugged. "I sometimes think they don't even notice I'm gone."

"Oh don't say that. Go on. If anything comes up that I need help on, I'll let you know."

"OK. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Alex." She smiled then returned to her work.

At eight o'clock, Veronica sighed heavily. She was getting nowhere. She rose from her seat and stretched. There was no way around it. She had nothing to help Duncan with. Desperate times, desperate measures.

After a brief lookup, Veronica punched in Lizzie's phone number. It rang 4 times before Lizzie picked up. "Hello?"

"Lizzie, it's Veronica."

"Veronica who?" Lizzie asked annoyed.

Veronica groaned. "Come on Lizzie. Neptune's not that big. How many Veronicas do you know?"

"What do you want?"

"Your help."

"What makes you think I would ever help you?"

"How about for the sake of your niece?"

Lizzie dropped dead silent.

"Have I got your attention now?"

"Yeah. What about her?"

"First, can I trust that you'll keep this conversation quiet?"

"Meaning?"

"Meaning you won't tell your parents."

"I haven't talked to my parents since I left the house 6 years ago."

Veronica's eyes shot open at that revelation. "Seriously?"

"What do you need, Veronica?"

"First your word Lizzie."

"Yes I won't say a word. Now what about my niece?"

"She's in town."

"What?" Lizzie gasped. "She is?"

"Yeah, she is. She just showed up a couple days ago. I just met her for the first time today."

"How old is she?"

"8."

"So…what do you need my help with?"

"Well, Duncan's in town and he wants to stay that way."

"What?" Lizzie's voice shrilled. "Are you serious?"

"Yeah."

"Did you try to talk him out of it?"

"Of course." She didn't put up a huge fight though if she was being honest. "He's pretty adamant though."

"OK. So…"

"So…in order for him to stay in town and keep Lilly he wants me to build a case against your parents."

"Good luck with that." Lizzie retorted.

"Come on Lizzie. Please. Anything you can help me with. I promised Meg that I wouldn't let your parents take her. She talked about some adoption agency that they'd send her to and it was horrible. You know what they did to Grace, Lizzie. You want the same thing to happen to your niece?"

It was quiet for about 30 seconds.

"Please Lizzie?" Veronica was on the verge of begging. "Anything you can help me with would be greatly appreciated. Do it for Meg. Do it for Lilly."

"Lilly?"

"Yeah, she's named after Duncan's sister. Please Lizzie?"

Lizzie sighed. "OK. I'll help you."

"Oh thank…"

"I want something though."

So so close. "OK."

"I want to meet her."

Veronica's eyes grew wide. "Seriously?"

"Yeah. If you let me meet her, I'll help you out."

"OK. I'll talk to Duncan. This is going to have to be done here at my office though. Duncan, for obvious reasons, can't be seen in public right now."

"Sure. Let me know."

"I will." Veronica disconnected the call and called Duncan. He answered on the 3rd ring.

"Oh hey. How are you doing?"

"Not good." Veronica told him truthfully. "You may not be happiest to hear this but I was really coming up with nothing, Duncan so I had no other choice."

"What?"

"I went to Lizzie."

"What?" He screamed.

"I was hitting dead ends, Duncan. Seriously, I was becoming desperate."

It took about 20 seconds before Duncan responded. "OK, so what did she say?"

"She said she'd help. Her condition is she meets Lilly."

"No."

"Duncan!"

"No, Veronica, it's too risky."

"Yeah if you were out in public yes, it would be. I told her it would have to be here in my office. You want to keep your daughter. Right now I'm thinking this is about the only way."

Duncan sighed. He knew this wasn't going to be easy. "OK. Can you set it up for tomorrow?"

"Will do."

Veronica called and arranged for Lizzie to meet Lilly at 1 the next day. The next thing she remembered was smelling coffee which was weird considered she didn't make any coffee. She glanced down at her computer screen. She had to click it on to see what time it was. It was 20 to 10. She sat up and saw Logan sitting beside her.

"You should really start locking your doors." Logan teased as he kissed her cheek and pulled her sideways into a hug.

"How long have you been here?"

"About half an hour."

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"Because I'm sure you need sleep." He told her as he started to rub her back. "How's the case coming?"

"Slow." She yawned. "I was starting to hit dead ends."

"Did you figure something out?"

"Yeah."

"What are you going to do?"

"Logan, even though this is Duncan and he's our friend, it's still a case."

"So you can't tell me anything?"

"I'm just trying to maintain my business, Logan. It's business; not because it's Duncan."

Logan sighed. "Fine. Whatever."

Veronica sighed. God, she felt like she was back in high school again.

"When are you going to tell him?"

"About what?"

Logan threw her an 'are you serious' look.

"Soon. Probably tomorrow."

"Veronica…"

"Logan…" She ran her fingers through her hair. "It's been a long day, OK? He'll find out we're together. I promise."

Logan nodded. For some odd reason, it felt like it was going to have to be tortured out of her before she would tell Duncan about how she chose Logan.

* * *

The next day, promptly at 1, Lizzie Manning arrived at Veronica's office. Veronica warned her when she called back that she should be punctual. Lilly and Duncan had arrived 15 minutes earlier. They had gotten take out from a fast food restaurant and were eating lunch. Veronica had already eaten a sandwich.

When Lizzie walked in, Veronica noticed a couple different things. One, she had done an overhaul on herself. Her golden blonde hair was now auburn brown and it was kept above her shoulders. Her makeup more subdued. Her scantily clad outfits were no more as she was dressed in a crimson knee length silk dress and red high heels. The second thing she noticed was that she appeared to be carrying a present. That was sweet if she was going to give her niece a present.

"Veronica." Lizzie told her evenly.

"Lizzie…wow!" That had slipped past her lips before she got a chance to stop it. "You look amazing."

"Thank you." Lizzie scanned the office. "Looks like you're doing pretty well yourself."

"Yeah, well, all things considered business wise, yeah, I am."

Lizzie then realized what Veronica had meant by that. "Oh, yeah. I heard about your dad being sick. Sorry."

"Oh thanks."

Duncan came into the doorway. "Veronica?"

Veronica turned around and then Duncan was able to see Lizzie.

"Lizzie?" He gazed her up and down.

"Hi Duncan."

"Hey. Um…thanks for helping us."

"Sure." She gave a polite nod.

"Come meet Lilly." Duncan spun around on his heels and headed back into Veronica's office. Lizzie slowly followed behind Veronica. When she stepped inside, she noticed how Lilly was playing with some My Little Ponies.

When Lizzie chuckled, Lilly looked up. Lizzie immediately felt embarrassed. "Oh, I'm sorry. I was just thinking that Meg loved My Little Ponies too. They were her favorite thing to play with."

"Lilly, come here a minute." Duncan took a seat and held out his hand. Lilly stood up and came over by Duncan. "Lilly, this is mommy's sister, Aunt Lizzie. Lizzie, this is Lilly."

"Hi Lilly."

"Hi Aunt Lizzie." Lilly smiled at her which made Lizzie have a bittersweet smile.

"Wow, she…uh…she looks a lot like Meg." Lizzie commented.

"Yeah, I see a strong resemblance to Meg in her. I see some of Lilly too."

"Your sister?"

"Yeah." Duncan quietly nodded.

Lizzie took some time getting to know Lilly…actually a lot of time. She was in Veronica's office for almost two hours. It took Lilly a little time but before any of them knew what hit them, she was talking up a storm telling her about her life. Lizzie told her about herself but mainly she talked about Meg.

"I need to get going." She informed them and reached for the present. "I have an appointment in about 20 minutes I need to get to. Before I go though, I wanted to give you this."

"Lizzie, it was unnecessary for you to get Lilly anything."

"Well, I didn't buy it." Lizzie admitted. "It was something I had though and I thought it was be a nice present for Lilly."

Lilly looked at the present then at everyone. "Go ahead." Lizzie coaxed. "Open it."

Lilly eagerly tore into it and there was silver picture frame. It was split into two sections. One had a picture of Meg with both Lizzie and Grace and the other side there was a picture of Meg and Duncan together. Veronica cracked a smile. They were both beautiful pictures.

"Daddy, it's mommy!" Lilly excitedly exclaimed.

"Yeah, it is sweetie."

"This is mommy and you."

"Yeah, it is." Duncan nodded then looked to both Lizzie and Veronica. "I remember when that picture was taken." He admitted. "It was at the end of school party that John Enbom threw."

Veronica nodded. She knew about the party because of Logan but she didn't go.

"Lilly, what do you tell Aunt Lizzie?"

"Thank you Aunt Lizzie." She gave her a hug. Lizzie pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

"You're welcome sweetie. Well, I better go." She rose and got a piece of paper from her purse and jotted down her phone number on it. "Here's my number; give me a call when you get time and we can talk about the impending case or if …" Lizzie cut off realizing that she was about to make assumptions.

Duncan smiled. "It's OK, Lizzie. I'll definitely call you. We'll all get together sometime, OK?"

"Thanks Duncan. Bye Veronica."

"Bye Lizzie. Take care."

"I hope everything turns out OK for your dad."

Duncan looked confused.

"Thank you. I appreciate that."

Lizzie then left and Duncan turned to Veronica. "What am I missing? What's going on with your dad?"

"He has Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma." Veronica quietly told him as she turned away.

"Oh my god!' He gasped as he gently touched her arm. "I'm so sorry to hear that Veronica. How's he doing?"

"OK. The prognosis is slowly declining though. None of the treatments are working."

"I'm really sorry."

"Thank you, Duncan."

"Listen, I want to thank you for getting Lizzie's help and for even taking the case at all."

"It's not a problem, Duncan." She cracked a smiled as she looked down at Lilly who was off in her own little world playing with her My Little Ponies.

"Well, to say thank you, I'll like to have you over for supper tonight."

Veronica raised a curious eyebrow. "You're cooking?"

"Daddy's a good cook, Aunt Veronica." Lilly piped up then.

"I'm sure he is, Lilly. Well, what time?"

"How about 7:30?"

It was as if Logan had radar to show up at the most inappropriate time as he appeared in the doorway. She glanced up to meet his eyes. It wasn't so much madness in them but more worry than anything. "Umm…sure."

Logan sighed. He was wrong to worry that Duncan was going to steal Veronica away from him, right? It was worse thinking that Veronica was going to let him, right?

"So….who was that just left?" Logan casually asked.

"Lizzie Manning." Duncan glanced over his shoulder at Logan.

Logan's eyes grew wide. "Lizzie? Seriously? That's Meg's sister?"

"The very same." Veronica told him.

Logan glanced down at the little girl who was watching him. "So who is this?" He smiled down at her.

"Logan, this is my daughter, Lilly. Lilly, this is Uncle Logan."

"Hi Lilly."

"Hi Uncle Logan."

Logan grinned. "I need to get used to that."

Veronica glanced over at him. "I forgot to ask you. When's Trina due?"

"Actually she just went to the hospital right now."

"Trina's having a baby?" Duncan asked.

"Yes, first baby. She failed to mention how she had been back in LA. I'm heading over to the hospital right now. I was just going to check to see if you had wanted to come, Veronica. Sorry, Duncan, I guess I didn't realize that you would be here." Logan said but his eyes never left Veronica.

"It's OK. Well, actually I was going to make supper for Veronica." Duncan told him. "You know, kind of as a thank you for helping me with the case and for talking to Lizzie to get her to agree to help us."

So that's why Lizzie was there; she was helping Duncan with the case. "Really?"

"Yeah." Veronica said quietly.

"Duncan, can you give us a minute?" Logan's eyes stayed on Veronica. "I need to talk to my…" Veronica's look said it all. "Veronica."

"Umm…sure."

"We'll be right back." She closed the door to her office. Duncan and Lilly were inside and Veronica and Logan were in the reception area.

"What the hell are you doing?" Logan demanded.

"It's just a thank you meal." Veronica shrugged.

"Veronica, you are not that naïve. You haven't been in a very long time."

"You're making too much of this, Logan. It's just a meal. You're my boyfriend."

"Are you telling me that or are you reminding yourself?" Logan asked as he crossed his arms across his chest.

"Logan…come on. I love you. You know that."

"Yeah, I do. But right now I can't help feeling that the more time you neglect to tell Duncan the truth about us, the more he's going to think he has a chance to get you back."

"I don't…"

"Veronica!" Logan barked then caught himself when he realized how loud he was. "You need to tell him."

"And I plan on it…tonight."

"Why not now?"

"Because…" Veronica hesitated, trying to think of a good excuse. "I'm trying to think the best way to tell him, OK?"

Logan was pissed off. Why the hell did Duncan feel the need to come back now? This was starting to feel like high school all over again.

"Nice to know you're concerned more about Duncan's feelings than your own boyfriend's."

"Logan…" Veronica exclaimed.

"You know what? Just forget it. I need to head to LA to see Trina. I guess I'll just talk to you when you get back." He turned to leave.

"Wait a second!" She told him.

He sighed as he turned back around. "What?"

Veronica rushed over to him and kissed him hard. He tried to resist but Veronica wore him down. It was several seconds later when she moved away from him. "I love you. Just you, Logan. It's always been you, OK? I'm just trying to be a friend. Nothing's going to happen. I promise."

Logan stared at her skeptically.

"What did we say about trust?"

"I trust you; I'm not so sure on him."

"Well, it's time to get past that. I won't do anything that's going to jeopardize us."

He was quiet.

"OK?"

"OK." He slowly nodded. He leaned down and kissed her again. "Have to go." He headed for the door. "Veronica?"

"Yeah?"

He turned around. "I love you too."

Veronica smiled at him as he left. She then sighed. She really thought that Logan was overreacting. That he was jealous. He had no reason to be though. There wasn't a chance in hell Duncan was still interested in her…was there?

* * *

That night, Veronica arrived at Duncan's old house at 7:30. She had brought a bottle of wine and made some snickerdoodle cookies. She had brought a present for Lilly too. She loved the necklace that Lilly had given her back when they were in high school. She had worn it almost every day. She decided to give it to Duncan's daughter now. She didn't think that Lilly would actually mind. After all, it was Veronica's necklace now and it was going to family.

She rang the doorbell and Duncan answered the door with a smile. "Hey."

"Hey."

"Come on in." He moved away from the door and she walked in and gazed around. It was still the same. Oh sure, maybe a few minor style changes but otherwise it was still relatively the same.

Lilly was upstairs playing in her bedroom. It was the room right next to Lilly's old room. Duncan had taken up his parents' master bedroom now.

There was no one else at the house. Celeste and Jake were living in Napa permanently and as for any sort of wait staff, Duncan didn't want to risk it.

"Are you hungry? It shouldn't be too much longer."

"What are you making?"

"Grilling steaks."

"Sounds good." Veronica smiled. "Yeah, I'm getting hungry. Haven't had much chance to really eat anything in the last 24 hours."

"Oh well it shouldn't be more than 15 more minutes."

"OK, sounds good." She pulled a little box to hold the necklace in. "You know, Lizzie giving Lilly that picture it got me to thinking."

"About what?"

"I decided to give Lilly a present too."

Duncan sighed. "I really wish you guys wouldn't feel obligated to get her presents. It's exceedingly unnecessary."

"I know but…it's your sister's necklace that she gave the summer before she died."

Duncan was taken aback. "Well, that's very sweet of you, Veronica but don't you want to keep that? Kind of a memento to remember her by?"

Veronica thought about her visits with Lilly and pictured her in her head. "No, I have plenty of memories to remember her by. I'd like her to have it. Do you care if I go give it to her?"

"Sure, OK. I mean if you're sure."

"I am." Veronica confirmed. She headed up the stairs to Lilly's room. She knocked on the door and peeked her head inside. Lilly was on the floor playing with her Barbies. She looked up. "Hi Aunt Veronica."

Veronica smiled. "Hi sweetie. Watcha doing?"

"Just playing with my Barbies. Do you want to play with me?"

"Sure." Veronica sat down next to her. "I want to give you something first." She handed the small box to her.

"What is it?"

"Go ahead and open it and find out."

Lilly opened the box and saw the necklace. "It's so pretty."

"It is." Veronica nodded. "Now, this was your aunt Lilly's." She explained to her as she clasped it around the little girl's neck. "She gave it to me when we were in high school. I'm sure she would love you to have it now."

"Really?" Lilly's eyes lit up in excitement.

"Yes, really."

"Aunt Veronica?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you think my aunt Lilly would have liked me?"

"Are you kidding? She would have absolutely loved you, sweetie. She would have spoiled you rotten." Veronica laughed.

"Do you have a picture of Aunt Lilly?"

"Well, not on me. Hasn't your daddy showed you what she looked like?"

"No we didn't have any pictures of her with us."

"Hold on a second. I know there are pictures around here of her." She got up and called down to Duncan. Duncan knew there were pictures of all of them in Lilly's old room. He told her she was fine to go in and get them.

She found the picture from the Homecoming before Lilly died sitting in her mirror on top of her dresser. The old shoebox full of pictures was in her closet.

She came back into the room and sat down beside her. "Here. This is what your aunt Lilly looks like." She showed her the picture from Homecoming.

"Aunt Lilly's so pretty!"

"Yeah, she is."

"Is that you?"

Veronica nodded. "Yep, that's me with your daddy. Uncle Logan was dating your aunt Lilly back then."

"Can I keep this?"

"I don't think your daddy would mind." She told her. "Why don't…" She rose again and set it beside her picture of Meg. "we put it right beside the picture of your mommy?"

"OK." Lilly nodded. "Did you know my mommy?"

Veronica nodded again. "Yep, I sure did. Your mommy was one of my best friends."

"She's in heaven now."

One single tear trickled down Veronica's cheek. "That's right, sweetie. Your mommy's in heaven with Aunt Lilly. They're angels in heaven looking down on you."

"You think they can see me?"

"I know they can."

"Aunt Veronica?"

"Yes?"

"Who's in the picture with mommy and Aunt Lizzie?"

"That's your aunt Grace. That's your mommy's other sister."

"Why didn't she come with Aunt Lizzie to see me?"

Veronica sighed. Wow! She was very inquisitive. "Well, it's kind of hard to explain, Lilly. See aunt Grace is still in high school. She lives with your grandma and grandpa."

"Will I get to meet grandma and grandpa?"

If Veronica had her way, that would be a hell no. "Maybe someday. Your grandma and grandpa want to take you away from your daddy. We don't want them to do that."

"I'd be really sad if I couldn't be with daddy."

"Yeah, I know you would. Before your mommy went to heaven, she made me promise not to let your grandma and grandpa take you away from your daddy."

Veronica and Lilly played Barbies for a few minutes before Lilly started in on her next round of questions.

"Aunt Veronica?"

"Yes?"

"Did you date my daddy?"

Veronica's breath hitched in her throat. "Umm…yeah, Lilly. We dated."

"Were you in love?"

Oh god. "Something like that."

"Are you going to marry daddy?"

Veronica's eyes grew wide in surprise. "Lilly, where would you get an idea like that?"

"From daddy. He has a picture of you by his bed."

Oh shit, Logan's right. Quite frankly deep down she figured he probably was but didn't want to believe that.

She then heard Duncan call up the stairs that supper was ready. He had poured himself and Veronica a glass of wine and Lilly had lemonade.

They casually talked about things…PG rated things.

"I really like the pictures of Aunt Lilly daddy." His daughter told him.

Duncan cracked a smile. "I'm glad, honey."

"Aunt Lilly was very pretty."

"She was." He nodded.

"I put the picture that was taken of all of us in the hallway here before homecoming next to the picture of Meg." Veronica explained as she took a bite of steak. "Wow! That's great."

"Thanks. That was a really good picture."

"It was. I think it was probably the last one taken of all of us together."

"I think so."

The rest of dinner was relatively quiet. Veronica brought out her cookies when everyone was finished. Lilly had two of them; Duncan helped himself to three. They loved them which brought a smile to Veronica's face. It was soon after when Lilly headed back upstairs to keep playing until bedtime.

Veronica's phone beeped in her pocket. Duncan looked over at her. "Sorry." She apologized. "I keep it on because if there's some emergency, Alex can get a hold of me."

Duncan nodded curiously. "Is Alex your boyfriend?"

Veronica stifled a laugh. "No, Alex is my business partner."

"Oh. Sorry; I just assumed."

"It's OK." Veronica cracked a smile as she glanced down at the message. It was from Logan.

_-I have a niece_

Veronica quickly texted back. _–Congratulations Uncle Logan! Can't wait 2 meet her._

"What is it?"

"Oh, Logan just sent a message how Trina had a little girl."

"Oh that's great."

"Yeah, it is." She commented as she put her phone back in her pocket.

"You two must hang out together a lot." Duncan casually mentioned.

Veronica looked up to meet his gaze. "It's relatively new again because I haven't been in town more than 2 months but yeah, we're…"

Duncan was hanging onto her every word.

"We're rebuilding our relationship."

"Are you two together?"

Veronica's conscience, aka Senior Lilly, was telling her, _Come on Veronica. Time to tell the truth. He needs to know._ "We're…"

"Daddy!" Lilly screamed from upstairs and Duncan sighed.

"Sorry. I'll be back." He told her as he headed upstairs.

Veronica rose from her seat and let out a heavy sigh. God, that was close. She frowned then. How was she planning on answering that question? In the back of her mind, deep in the recesses, she knew he'd ask. She had been playing naïve, she realized. She had just wanted to believe that since so much time had passed, he wouldn't be interested in her. I guess old feelings die hard.

She had to tell him about Logan. About how they were back together and there was no way to break them up. They made plans already. Plans for the future and they involved marriage. It may not be immediate but it would be imminent.

Duncan came back down at 9:30. He had just put Lilly to bed. He let out a heavy sigh.

Veronica cracked a smile. "She in bed?"

He nodded. "We were talking for a few minutes. I showed her some more pictures of Lilly." He pulled out a picture of all 4 of them at the beach. It was taken on Veronica's 16th birthday. Veronica was in a modest magenta bikini and Lilly was in a slightly skimpier teal bikini. Each of them wore a color appropriate sarong. Duncan had black board shorts on and Logan wore red ones. They were sitting on the sand. It was a very impromptu photo. None of them were looking directly at the camera. Veronica had been sitting in between Duncan's legs. Her body was turned looking at Logan though who was behind her to the left. There was a look of surprise on her face and Logan was laughing. Lilly, who had been sitting in between Logan's legs and Duncan were grinning hugely at her.

Veronica's fingers traced over the picture. She remembered that day. "I love this picture."

"Yeah, I do too. Keep it."

"Duncan…"

"No seriously. And actually…" He handed the shoebox to her. "here. I'm sure you have pictures but why don't you take some more?"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course. They're just sitting in her room getting dusty."

"Why didn't you ever take pictures with you when you left?"

"Because it was very unplanned. I took very little with me if you remember right."

"Yeah, that's true."

Duncan refilled his wine glass. "I…I've really regretted leaving you the way I did, Veronica."

She bit her lip. "You did what you had to, Duncan. I have no ill will toward you because of it."

"Yeah but still…" Duncan gazed at her. "I really missed you while I was gone."

"Yeah, I missed you too."

"You know I have a picture of you by my bed."

She slowly nodded as she looked away from him. OK was it hot in here? She wondered. "Lilly told me. Why do you have a picture of me by your bed though Duncan?"

"Because…I love you."

Veronica sighed. She still couldn't meet his eyes.

"I thought about you every day when I was gone."

She was silent.

"We can be together now, Veronica. You're the one I was supposed to be with." Duncan declared.

"Duncan, I…"

He leaned in, almost kissing her but true to the word she gave Logan, she stopped. She put her hand up to his lips. "I…I can't, Duncan." She rose from the couch she was sitting on.

"What? What's going on, Veronica?"

"Duncan…there's been so much time that's passed." Veronica told him as she grabbed her purse. "We can't just pick up where we left off. It's not going to be possible."

"Why not?"

"Because we're different people now, Duncan. I'm different."

He stared at her sadly.

"And…"

"And what?" He pressed.

"And I have a boyfriend, Duncan. I love him." She admitted. "I love him a lot actually and I won't hurt him." She looked down at the floor. "I've hurt him before and I can't do it again. I have to go."

And with that she took off without another word to him. Duncan watched her go, sad and confused.

Veronica couldn't sleep that night. Duncan's almost kiss had been running through her mind since she fled his house. She sat up in her bed at 1:28. She turned on her lamp by her bed and got out of bed to grab the pictures from her desk. She had set the shoebox there when she came in. She opened the box and peered in. Veronica gasped. It seemed like she had a picture for every minute of their friendship. There were a lot of just them. Then there were the ones of all 4 of them and of just Logan and Lilly. Veronica had to dig to the bottom of the pile to find the family pictures of Lilly and Duncan together.

There was a knock on her door. "Veronica?"

"Come in dad." She called out.

Keith opened the door. "You OK, honey?"

Veronica nodded as she scanned the pictures. "Yeah, I'm fine, dad. Sorry if the light woke you up."

"No, I was up. What's wrong? Can't sleep?"Keith sat down beside her on the bed.

She shook her head.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "No, that's OK. I mean, I do want to talk about it but I think it's best if I talk to the people that it involves." She then found a picture that brought a huge smile to her face. She even laughed.

"What is it?"

Veronica handed the picture to her dad. It was taken about a month after Veronica had met Logan. Lilly was 13 but the others were 12. They were sitting poolside at Logan's pool. They all huge, genuine smiles on their faces. Veronica sat at one end, then came Logan, Duncan and lastly was Lilly on the other end.

"Did Duncan give you that?"

"He gave me the shoebox and told me I could take whatever ones I wanted."

"That's a great picture."

"It is."

A few minutes later, Keith went back to his room and went to sleep. It was just after 2 when Veronica called Logan. It took almost 4 rings before he picked up.

"You're disrupting my beauty sleep." He mumbled into the phone.

"Want me to hang up?"

"No." He yawned. "What's up?"

"I just wanted to tell you congratulations on being an uncle."

"Veronica you sent me a message saying that about 5 hours ago when I was awake."

She sighed. "I'm sorry. I'll hang up. Go back to sleep."

"Veronica, tell me what's going on."

"Nothing. Just…why don't you stop by tomorrow at my work? Say around 1?"

He yawned again. "Are you going to tell me what this is about?"

"I'll explain it all later. I'll let you go back to sleep. Goodnight. I love you."

"I love you too, V. Goodnight."

Veronica sighed as she hung up the phone. Less than 12 hours until they all had a talk. She just hoped that everyone walked away unscathed.

* * *

Veronica gazed at the clock. The guys should be arriving at her office any time now. Her stomach was in knots. She had called Duncan that morning and told him the same thing she told Logan that they should talk at 1 in her office. By the tone of his voice, he was excited at the prospect.

"May I help you?" She heard Alex say.

"Uh…yeah." Veronica knew it was Duncan. "I'm Duncan Kane. Is Veronica here?"

"Yeah." Alex glanced through the doorway since it was open a crack. "It's…uh…nice to meet you, Duncan. I'm Alex Meyers. I was Veronica's partner in the FBI a couple years ago."

"Oh…it's…uh nice to meet you." He didn't realize that Alex was a guy.

"You can go on in. Veronica's expecting you."

"Uh…thanks."

He quickly knocked twice and opened the door.

"Hey Duncan. Thanks for coming in. I appreciate it."

"Hey Veronica. Sure. Is there a problem with the case?"

"No…yes. Well, maybe." Veronica sighed. "Duncan we need to talk."

He groaned. "That's never a good thing to hear a woman say."

She gave him a knowing smile. "Yeah, I know. We need to talk more about last night though. First, let me say I'm sorry for just running out on you like that."

"It's OK. I mean, I was going too fast for you. I shouldn't have kissed you…"

"Kiss?" Logan appeared in the doorway as if right on cue. He was less than amused to say the least. "What kiss?"

"Logan." She bit her lip. "Want to have a seat?"

"No thanks." He replied curtly. "I think I'll stick by the doorway."

"Hey Logan." Alex nodded as he returned to his desk after being in the bathroom.

"Hey Alex." Logan nodded to him.

"Let me rephrase." She told him as her eyes narrowed. "Take a seat, Logan." She smiled smugly at him.

"Of course. At your service, sugarpuss." Logan grumbled as he sat next to Duncan.

Alex snickered in the background.

Veronica rose from her chair. "Hey Meyers, don't you have a bail jumper to go chase after?"

"Trying to get rid of me?" Alex smirked.

"As a matter of fact yes I am." She smiled sweetly at him.

"Come on V. I want to see how you handle having both ex-boyfriends back." He teased and Veronica groaned.

"Alex…"

"Don't worry; I'm going." He winked at her then left.

She sighed as she slammed her door shut. "God I have too many men to deal with in my life." She sat back down on her desk and ran her fingers through her hair.

"I don't like that guy." Duncan grumbled.

"Are you kidding? He's a pretty cool guy. Isn't he sugarpuss?" Logan glanced back at her.

She glared at Logan. "Stop using that stupid nickname! You know I hate it."

"I know." Logan smirked. "It's part of why I love using it."

"Logan, why are you even here?" Duncan stared at him.

"I was summoned here." Logan told him bluntly. "I'm assuming to hear about you two making out."

Veronica couldn't help herself; she let out a small chuckle.

"What?" Logan demanded.

"Lilly was right; jealousy is not becoming on you."

"Lilly?" Duncan repeated, confused.

Veronica caught what she said and glanced at Logan who had his eyebrows raised in a way that silently told her, _'go ahead; explain that one'_.

"Yeah. Back when they were together in high school and having a fight for the umpteenth time, Lilly mentioned that to me. The color green looks good on you, Logan. In the words of you, senior year, when you were dating Hannah, you're cute when you're jealous."

"Who's Hannah?"

"Long story." Veronica told Duncan while her eyes never left Logan.

"That wasn't a denial, you know."

"Logan, for Christ sake. Duncan and I did not make out. He tried to kiss me but I stopped him, OK? I didn't kiss him."

"Really." It was a statement not a question.

"Yes!" Veronica exclaimed. "Really. Duncan, a confirmation would be great here."

"I tried to kiss her but she stopped me."

Logan breathed a sigh of relief which pissed Veronica off. What happened to trusting her?

"Honestly why do you care though, Logan? She has a boyfriend."

Logan raised an eyebrow curiously. Oh, so it was mentioned just not who the boyfriend was. "Are you really that clueless or are you just acting that way?" Logan quipped.

"What does that mean?"

Veronica sighed. "He cares because **he's** my boyfriend, Duncan."

"What?" Duncan's eyes grew wide in surprise.

"Logan and I are back together."

Logan smirked at Duncan then rose from his seat. He leaned over the desk and gave Veronica a small kiss. "Thank you. It's about time you admitted that to him."

"Excuse me but you're not a mute. Why didn't you tell him?"

"Wait…" Duncan held up a hand. "I'm still confused. When I left, you two could barely stand each other."

"Duncan, that was eight years ago." Logan reminded him. "Did you really think that you would be able to come back and pick up right where you left off?"

Duncan ignored Logan. "Veronica I love you."

She sighed. "I know; I love you too..."

The expression on Logan's face said it all when she looked over at him. She groaned. "You're ridiculous, you know that? Why don't you let me finish a sentence before you start throwing death glares, OK?"

Logan shrugged. "Fine."

"As I was saying, I love you too. I love Lilly as if she were my own niece. But I'm in love with Logan and honestly I have been for a long time."

Duncan raised an eyebrow. "How long?"

Veronica bit her lip. "Since I kissed him at the end of junior year."

Logan looked stunned at her admission. "Wow! Really?"

"Yes, really. And you think I sell you short."

"Are you telling me that you were in love with Logan while you were dating me?"

Veronica stared at Duncan pensively then glanced over at Logan. "Yeah." She whispered.

"Veronica how could you date me when you were really in love with Logan?" Duncan asked. His voice had raised a notch or two.

"Because Logan had a perpetual death wish that summer."

Logan started to open his mouth but Veronica continued. "If you're planning a rebuttal, it would be wise to save it. Deep down you know what I'm saying is the truth."

"Yeah, I guess."

"No guessing; it's the truth. Look, Duncan, Logan's right and I had even told you this last night. A lot has changed and I do mean a lot. None of us are the same people we were when we were 18. There has been too much time that's past that we can't pick up where we left off. Logan and I have been to hell and back since you left. Between trying to clear Logan of murder charges…"

"Dad's trial and murder…" Logan added.

"Finding out that Cassidy raped me at Shelly Pomeroy's party…"

"Wait, what? Cassidy raped you?" Duncan's voice shrilled.

"Yeah. It took a lot of figuring out to learn that though." Logan told him.

"Right before prom I found out that I had Chlamydia. I didn't think that I had really gotten it from you although that was a brief possibility. You had a small amount of people you had slept with too so I quickly eliminated that option. Anyway, it took a lot of time to figure it out but what happened is that Woody Goodman had molested Cassidy when he played on Woody's little league team."

Duncan's eyes darted over Logan. He nodded.

"Woody had given Cassidy Chlamydia and that was how I got it."

"Oh my god." Duncan whispered.

"That's not the whole story though." Logan told him.

"Oh god, there's more?"

"Yeah so all of this information came out during a showdown between me and Cassidy on the Neptune Grand roof."

Duncan sat in silence.

"He had a gun." Veronica revealed. "He would have killed me if Logan hadn't came to my rescue when I texted him."

Duncan glanced over at Logan again whose gaze was on Veronica. She started tearing up. "Thanks to his help and tackling Cassidy, he got the gun away from him and I was able to grab it."

"I luckily stopped her from shooting him."

"Instead of being arrested, he jumped off the roof."

"Oh god."

"Yeah, " Veronica nodded. "Since then there were a few instances but nothing like that."

"I don't know about that." Logan murmured.

Veronica's eyes narrowed. She knew where he was going but decided that the Hearst rapes needn't be brought up. "The point is, though, when we got back together again senior year, I thought by dating you, I'd be able to forget about my feelings for Logan and legitimately love you."

"But that never happened." He sullenly concluded.

"No, it didn't." She sadly agreed.

"Did you ever love me?"

"I've always loved you, Duncan." Her eyes fell to her desk then. "Back when we were together the first time, I thought I was head over heels in love with you." She admitted. "I had really thought that you were my one true love." She decided to clarify. "My first love."

"Wait, so I wasn't even your first love?" Duncan's eyes darted between Logan and Veronica.

"Duncan…" She let out a huge heavy sigh. "Please let me finish."

He sighed as she continued.

"I did think it. I did." She repeated. "Then you broke my heart."

"Veronica…"

"I realize you thought you were my brother and yeah, that would have been a difficult conversation to have but suddenly breaking up with me with no explanation and ignoring me for more than a year made the idea of you as my first true love vanish."

Logan bit his lip at the admission. _Wow!_ He thought to himself. _That's pretty harsh_.

"Logan was worse to you, you know." He countered.

"Yeah, junior year he was a jackass."

Logan groaned.

"He bashed my headlights in. Then again, I didn't just take it. I had planted a bong in his locker."

"Ahh…. Nine years later, I finally get a confession." Logan smirked.

"Truthfully, it took me a long time to get over it. All of it from back then but I did."

"It doesn't sound like it." Duncan commented.

"No, I have. I realize you were in a bad place. We became friends again though Duncan after time. I thought senior year was going to be a fresh start; we'd try to redo everything. When I found out about Meg though, I started to realize that things weren't going to be that easy."

"Then I left you."

"Yeah. You left. I wished you well and I didn't give a second thought to you returning. I didn't think you would ever want to try to come back and challenge the Mannings."

"Would you have rather I stayed away?"

"No, I…" She looked to Logan then who was clueless what kind of response should be given. "No, I would want you to do what's best for Lilly. If you feel that it's best to raise her back here, then you should do it. Hopefully that's the main reason you choose to come back though."

Duncan grew silent and Veronica had her answer. "Did you know that she asked me last night if you and I were getting married?"

Logan's eyes opened wide. "What? She did?"

"How did you respond?"

"I…I didn't. You called for supper." She ran her fingers through her hair. "OK, now you need to decide. Now that you know about me and Logan…where do we stand?"

"I thought we didn't." He grumbled.

"Duncan, I still want us to be friends. I do. You and Lilly mean a lot to me. I want to still help you with the case. The question is now that you know where things stand here with everything do you still want me to continue on the case?"

He sighed as he thought about it.

"If you don't want to, I'll understand."

"No, I don't want that." Duncan concluded. "Anything you can do to help, I would appreciate it."

"OK." Veronica nodded.

"I need to go pick up Lilly." Duncan rose from his seat. He headed for the doorway. Before he left though, he turned around. "Can you just answer me one last question?"

"Sure."

"It sounds like since I left, you and Logan have broken up and gotten together more than once."

"True." Logan said.

"OK so how can you be so sure it will work this time?"

Logan and Veronica shared a look. It was like a mutual agreement.

"Because when you spend 7 years regretting how you left things and missing the person you love most, you will do anything you can to be with them."

"I'm sure you might have been thinking the same thing." Logan chimed in. Yeah, Duncan had.

"I wrote letters to Logan, Duncan while I was with the FBI in Quantico. Fifty-seven of them actually. I never mailed them though mainly because I thought that he had moved on without me. It caused me to analyze the past and see what went wrong. We haven't been together long. All of this happened within the last week though."

"A week?" Duncan exclaimed. "You've only been together a week?"

"Well, maybe even less than that." Logan commented. "The point is, Duncan. We've been having serious talks since I ran into her at your sister's grave. We know where we're heading now."

"And that is…"

"Marriage of course."

"What?"

"Look, it's not going to be immediate but we know what the ultimate goal is." Veronica clarified.

"I'm not letting her go this time. This time it's forever." Logan declared.

"Infinity." Veronica corrected and Logan grinned.

Duncan sighed. He never thought he'd lose the battle of Veronica to Logan. He always thought he'd win her. "Well, I guess I'm happy for you."

"You are?" Veronica said, surprised. "You're sounding skeptical."

"I am." He admitted. "But I can see where you've been through a lot together and how much you've depended on each other. I only hope someday I meet someone who looks at me the way Veronica looks at you." He told Logan.

"You will, Duncan. You will."

"OK, I need to go now. Make sure you treat her right, Logan."

"I promise I will."

"OK see you guys."

"Bye Duncan." Veronica told him.

"See ya DK."

Duncan then left and Veronica plopped her head on her desk. "God, that was hard."

"I'm sure it was."

Veronica raised her head then noticed the picture she saw last night; the one of all 4 of them by the Echolls pool. She smiled.

"What is that?" Logan asked as he peered over her desk.

She handed the picture to him and his mouth dropped open as he looked at it. "Oh my god! Look how young we all were."

"Well, we were 12 Logan. This was taken shortly after I met you."

"So where did you find this?"

"In Lilly's room."

Logan glanced up in surprise.

"Duncan gave me an OK to get pictures from her room so Lilly could see what her aunt looked like." She pulled out the shoebox. "He's letting me pick which pictures I want."

"Really? How many have you taken?"

"Just a couple honestly. I like that one and of course this one." She produced the other picture she had looked at the night before.

Logan laughed. "I remember this. I had just told you the concert we were going to for your birthday."

"Yeah." She nodded. "I remember."

"We had a blast that night."

"A lot of good memories." She murmured as she set the pictures on her desk. "I hope they never fade."

"They won't if we don't let them."

Veronica grinned as Logan leaned over and kissed her.

* * *

**Wow! Huge chapter wasn't it? It took me over an hour to proofread it too. I wasn't originally going to bring Duncan back but decided to. OK so...you want to hear more about Veronica helping him with his case? This is still a Logan/Veronica story so they will still be the focus of this story. I didn't know if you wanted anymore about this. I hope I didn't confuse people with the Lilly/Lilly thing. Anyway, I'd love to know what you thought so please review. I think next chapter may pick up right where this left off and then also jump closer to Thanksgiving. You're great reviewers. I really do appreciate all of them.**


	8. Thanksgiving

***Huge sigh* OK so I'm really sorry I took so long to get this chapter out. I got busy with school. Technically I finished up all the assignments for my online class a whole month before it needed to be done. So proud of myself for that cause I NEVER do that. Anyway, that has been taking up the majority of my time. I'm living by myself again after 13 months with my parents for my health problems I had. I still have the health issues but I get to finally live by myself again. OK so we start where we left off but then I jump ahead to Thanksgiving. I'll give the official timetable at the end of the chapter. Please review. I love to read them and right now since I'm in Nebraska we're in for the pending snowstorm Q. It's snowing right now. I need something to read. Oh, maybe a little way in the middle I hit an M section but the majority of this chapter isn't.**

* * *

Over the next hour, Veronica and Logan looked through Lilly's pictures. They didn't make it all the way through them but Veronica was able to find several more she wanted including a picture that was taken on Halloween when Veronica was 10. She was dressed up as Ariel and Lilly was Cinderella. While Veronica had a huge smile on her face, Lilly's face was bland. Veronica smirked at the picture.

"Can I see?"

Veronica passed the picture over to him. Logan stared at the picture. He even squinted even though his vision was perfect. "What are you doing?" Veronica frowned as she glanced over and saw his expression.

"What is she wearing?"

"She was dressed as Cinderella."

"And apparently not happy about it either."

Veronica laughed. "No, she was pissed off because she wanted to be a punk rock girl and Celeste refused to let her be. She thought Lilly would look like a tramp and Celeste thought she would be talked about for letting her 11 year old dress like one."

"I take it you wanted to be Ariel though."

"The Little Mermaid was one of my favorite movies at the time." Veronica mused as she took the picture back and stared at it.

"What?"

"Things changed after that. Lilly didn't sit idly by. She became more rebellious with her parents, especially her mom."

"You think that her not getting to wear what she wanted on Halloween was the straw that broke the camel's back?"

Veronica shrugged. "I don't know. I can't say with absolutely certainty no but I can remember by Thanksgiving that year Lilly and Celeste were in a full out war."

Logan sat back and pondered this. Hmm…that did have distinct possibilities.

After Veronica was done, she closed the shoebox and set it on top of her filing cabinet. "There were a lot of good pictures of the two of you together." she commented.

Logan hesitated before answering; mainly because he wasn't sure how to answer that. "Yeah, there were."

"But…"

"But…a lot of those pictures were fake."

Veronica's eyebrows furrowed. "What are you talking about?"

"Don't get me wrong; they're good pictures but in a good portion of those pictures Lilly and I were fighting. Most of the time about something stupid."

"Hmm…like your jealousy perhaps?" Veronica raised a curious eyebrow.

Logan's eyes narrowed. "Excuse me; I had every right to be worried."

"And are we still talking about Lilly or have we moved onto me?" She had her arms folded across her chest.

"If you want to be technical, I guess both."

"So…umm…what happened to trusting me?"

"I do." he insisted.

"No, no you don't. If you did, you would have remembered that I told you that I was not going to do anything to put this relationship in jeopardy."

"Yeah, I'm sure that's true but you strung him along too, Veronica."

"I did not!"

"Veronica…" he ran a hand through his hair. "I don't want to have to worry, OK?"

"Then don't!" Veronica told him exasperated.

"Then explain to me why you didn't just tell him the first night he came in here?"

"Because…" Veronica sighed as she thought about it. "I guess I was too in shock. I never thought he'd come back." her eyes watched him closely. "You know, it's like I said earlier, you're not a mute; you have a voice. Why didn't you tell him when you ran into him in the hallway?"

Logan was mum.

"Yeah, that's what I thought. This goes both ways, Logan. You could have told him yourself."

"I thought you would."

"Yeah, that's a weak excuse and you know it."

He did know it; right now though it was all he could come up with.

"It's not important anymore." Veronica informed him. "Should I have told him sooner? Yeah, probably, I guess. But he knows now. He knows that I'm in love with you and that it's pretty much never died."

"Were you serious?"

She sighed, "About what?"

"About when you first knew you loved me?"

"You mean, when I said back to the first time we kissed?"

"Yeah."

"I…I don't know. I mean do I think it happened exactly then? No but after that kiss it definitely made me look at us…you differently. I will say that Duncan was right about one thing: you did hurt me far worse than he ever did. Well, at least by your words."

"Veronica…"

"I'm not dredging up the past to be mean, Logan. I'm telling you when things changed, OK?"

He nodded.

"Things were slowly…very slowly going back to the way they used to be. The poker game was a turning point but the biggest one came with your mom."

Logan was quiet so Veronica continued, "Opening the door that night and finding you there was a shock to say the least. I'd never seen you that way before in the whole time I had known you."

"Seen me like what?"

"Lost; it was the fact that you still had hope that your mom was still alive was what made me want to help you that night. I was hoping you wouldn't have to feel the hurt I went through when my mom left me."

"Veronica…"

"No, it was different. She was alive but the feelings were real and it was almost like she had died. The point that made me realize the hurt and anger wasn't worth it anymore came when we were in the Sunset Regent lobby and found out Trina had been using your mom's credit card. You broke down right there."

"Not my finest moment."

"You're missing the point, Logan. I knew the old you was still in there. That the hard, cold, unfeeling guy you had become hadn't taken you over completely. It was a relief to know."

"And what about you?"

"What about me?"

"What about the cold, unfeeling person you became after Lilly died?"

"I had to get tough. I didn't have a choice in that. Quite frankly you didn't give me one." she told him. "Besides, Logan, I don't play the naïve, sweet princess anymore. Today is a perfect example of why."

"True."

"You know you wouldn't have me any other way than the way I am now. Just admit that."

"OK, I will admit that you doing a 180 after Lilly's death gave me a true eye opener. I really didn't think you had the guts to change."

"What did you think would happen when you outcasted me from the 09er group? That I'd just fade into the background?" she raised a curious eyebrow.

"It was a thought."

"Well, you were wrong weren't you? If anything, that taught me to fight back even harder."

"Yes, I was wrong."

"Do you have any idea how much pleasure that gives me to hear you say those words?" she smirked.

"I'm sure."

"Look, I'm sure we're never going to see completely eye to eye on this subject but I'll do what I have to to keep Lilly with Duncan. Meg deserves that."

"I agree."

"Good. Now, do you want to do something tonight?"

Logan looked at his watch. It was already after 2. "I'll call and let you know. My first meeting of the day is in an hour and then I have a few after that. It's going to be later when I get out of work."

Veronica nodded, "OK. Just let me know."

"OK." Logan rose and leaned over her desk to kiss her. "Better get going." He gave her another kiss. "I love you."

Veronica smiled, "Love you too Logan." One last kiss and then he was gone.

"Mars Investigations."

It was just after 4 when her phone rang. She had been pouring over her information on Duncan's case. Lizzie would be back in a few days to provide any information that she had.

"Hello, could I please speak with Veronica Mars?" A woman asked in a professional tone.

"This is Veronica." she pulled out her notepad and pen just in case this was for a case.

"Hi Veronica, this is Becky, Dr. Young's nurse." Dr. Young was her dad's doctor.

"Oh." she said, surprised. "Hi Becky."

"Your dad asked me to call you."

"What happened?" she asked solemnly.

"He's…he's ok but he got brought into the hospital because he was having some trouble breathing."

"Oh my god. I'll be right there." she slammed the phone down, grabbed her purse and left.

It took her 15 minutes to get to the hospital. It would have been quicker had people driven faster and she would have made more lights. She cursed the damn drivers every time she had to stop at a stoplight. When she arrived in the ER parking lot, she threw the car in park and rushed in. A nurse guided her to the room her dad was in.

He was hooked up to a bunch of machines including a heart monitor and oxygen. He was asleep when she came in. She stood at the bedside and let out a heavy sigh. That startled Keith so he woke up. The first thing he saw was his daughter's unhappy scowl.

"Please don't look at me that way, honey." he mumbled as he shut his eyes.

"Why didn't you call me?"

Keith sighed, "I had the nurse call you."

"I know. I want to know why you didn't. I would have came right away."

"Honey, the ambulance was quicker, OK? You're really busy with cases."

"Stop making excuses, dad. No case is more important than you."

"Honey…"

"So what did Dr. Young say?"

"They were running some tests and they haven't came back in since then."

Veronica sighed as she took a seat next to her dad. He looked pale to her. She didn't want to think the worst here. She was trying her best not to but it wasn't easy considering she was sitting in the hospital.

Twenty minutes later there was a knock on the door and Dr. Young came in. They both looked up at him.

"Hello Keith, Veronica."

"Hi Dr. Young." Veronica said quietly.

"Hello doctor." Keith nodded. He noticed the doctor's solemn expression. "OK, I'm ready. Let's hear it." He told him.

The doctor glanced at Veronica who looked like she was bracing herself for the worst.

"I really wish I had better news, Keith." he flipped open Keith's chart. "I reviewed the new test results and while your blood tests appear to be the same as the last time we took them, the cancer appears to be spreading to the pleura."

Veronica's eyes started to well up, "What's that?"

"That's the lining in the lungs, Veronica. This is why he may have had some trouble breathing. Now we will treat the lung infection..."

"How long?" Keith asked.

"However long it takes." the doctor told him. "It could be a couple days; it could be a week. It just depends on how long it takes to treat."

"No, I mean how long. I'd like the new prognosis."

The doctor reviewed the information, "Well, right now this is the 1st thing that the cancer has spread to that is not right by the lymph nodes."

"Don't sugarcoat it, doc. Just the truth of what you think."

"A year." He predicted. "Maybe 2."

Veronica bolted from the room after hearing that news. Keith sighed. He wasn't surprised at all; by the prognosis or Veronica running away. Nothing surprised him anymore.

Veronica ran past the nurses who all stared at her then each other. It took her less than 60 seconds to get to her car and less than 5 minutes to get to Logan's office. It was now 5:30. She had never been to Logan's office but she knew the address. She ran through the lobby and saw the way to the management offices. She fled past where Mac's office was. She rode the elevator to the third floor and turned a corner and saw a red-haired receptionist sitting in front of Logan's office. Veronica tried to move past her but the woman stopped her.

"I'm sorry; can I help you?"

"Yeah." Veronica dried her tears. "I need to speak with Logan."

"I'm sorry; he's unavailable right now. Can I leave him a message for you?"

"No, I need to speak with him." she repeated.

"I'm sorry. You're who?"

"I'm Veronica. I'm his girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?" the receptionist raised an eyebrow. "Mr. Echolls doesn't have a girlfriend actually and I've had several people try to claim they are so I can leave him a message for him for you."

"Get him out here now!" Veronica snapped. "I am his girlfriend. Get him out here now and ask him."

She didn't need to. Logan emerged from his office with a confused look on his face.

"What's all the commotion, Kori?"

Veronica flung herself into his arms and started to cry. "Veronica…" he stared down at her confused.

"I'm sorry Logan. She claims to be your girlfriend and I told her you didn't have one and that you were busy."

"Tell her Logan." Veronica mumbled into his shirt.

Logan laughed nervously. "Actually Kori she is my girlfriend." His arms wrapped tightly around Veronica.

Kori's eyes grew wide.

"Meet Veronica Mars. She was my high school girlfriend. We just got back together within the last couple weeks."

"I told you." Veronica grumbled at her.

"I'm…I'm sorry. I guess I didn't realize."

"It's OK, Kori." he kissed the top of Veronica's head. "V, what's going on?"

Veronica started to bawl again.

Logan mouthed 'Hold all my calls' to Kori who nodded to him.

"Veronica..." They made it into his office. He closed the door and they sat down on his couch. "Veronica, you're scaring me. What's wrong?"

"My…dad's…in the…hospital." she choked out.

"What?" his eyes grew wide. "What happened?"

"He was having…trouble breathing…called 911."

"How's he doing now? Is he OK?"

"A year."

"A year?"

"To live, Logan. Doctor figures a year. No more than two."

Logan quickly pulled her in for a hug, "I'm sorry, Veronica."

"I'm so lost." she whispered. "I…can't deal with this."

"Deal with what?"

"The thought…of losing him."

"I know it's hard, Veronica. I know it won't make you feel any better but at least you have the ability to enjoy the time you have with him, maybe even say goodbye." Logan got quiet then. Several seconds later he added, "I never got that chance."

Saying goodbye to Aaron? Veronica was surprised he would even want to. Wait, he wouldn't think that. It then dawned on her. "Your mom."

"Yeah, she was weak. She took the easy way out and I've never gotten over that. I really wish I would have had the ability to talk to her. Tell her goodbye."

"I don't want to think about this." she dried her tears again.

"I know you don't. We can't run away from it forever though."

"I know." she whispered.

"What did you say when the doctor told you? What did you say to your dad?"

Veronica's look said it all, "You didn't. You ran, didn't you?"

"I just…I couldn't…"

"I know it's hard, Veronica but you've got to be strong."

"I don't know if I can."

"Of course you can. I'll be right there beside you, you know." he reminded her as he wrapped one arm around her shoulders and the other threaded their fingers together.

"Really?"

"Really. I promise. Come on." he let go of her and stood up. "I think we should go back to the hospital and see your dad."

"You're coming with me?"

He nodded. "Yes, I'll go with you." he leaned down and kissed her. "Give me a minute, OK? Be right back."

Veronica quietly nodded.

Logan headed out of his office to Kori's desk. "Hey, Kori. I'm going to head out. I've got a personal issue that just came up."

"Oh. OK." she looked surprised. "You want your last meeting rescheduled?"

"Yeah, that would be good. Whenever my schedule frees up would be great."

"OK, will do."

"After you have that done, you can get out of here. I appreciate you staying here later than usual today."

"Not a problem." Logan turned to head back into his office then. "Logan?"

"Yeah?" he looked over his shoulder.

Kori glanced around Logan. The door was open a crack. "I don't mean to pry but…is she OK?"

Logan solemnly nodded. "Yeah, she's just going through some personal stuff right now."

"I'm sorry." she told him sheepishly. "Also I'm sorry about earlier. I really thought she was like all the others."

"I know." Logan gave her an understanding smile. "It's relatively new. I would appreciate it though that if she comes in, you don't even have to let me know. You can just let her in."

"OK." Kori nodded. "Will do."

"I'll see you tomorrow."

Logan got his work and escorted Veronica out of the building.

"Logan…" she asked when he opened the passenger side door on his Range Rover. He didn't want her to risk driving when she was this upset.

"Yeah?"

"Did you cancel a work meeting to do this?"

"Yeah, I did. Just a meeting with the department heads. Not a huge deal."

"Logan, I don't want you having to rearrange work things for me and cause trouble."

Logan smirked as he got in the driver's side. "Veronica, I'm the boss. It's not like I can get fired."

"OK true. I just don't want to cause problems at your work." she told him as she watched him pull out of the parking lot. It was quiet for a moment. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you really get a lot of women claiming to be your girlfriend?"

Logan chuckled softly. "Some. Listen, I hope you're not mad at Kori. She wasn't trying to be a bitch or anything but she has to tell women that line a lot."

"I bet."

"She knows now though."

"How long has she been working for you?"

"Since the beginning. She's Casey's wife."

Veronica glanced over at him, amazed. "Casey Gant."

Logan gave a brief nod. "Yep. They've been married for a couple years now."

"Wow! Things change."

"That they do."

"So how many people do you know from high school that you actually have working for you?"

"I don't know." He shrugged. "20 or so I guess."

"And umm…how many are non 09er's?"

"I'd say it's about a 50/50 split."

Veronica smirked.

"Were you trying to assume I was being elitist, darling?" Logan asked sweetly.

"No, not at all."

"Mac wasn't an 09er, you know and she's the director over IT."

"True. No, I'm glad to hear you're not favoring people over others."

"That's not a good way to run a successful business."

"Very true."

"So really…how often do you have these women claiming to be your girlfriend?"

"Why? Are you worried?" he chuckled as he pulled into the hospital's parking lot.

"Well, I…"

Logan threw the vehicle in park. He turned to face her. "Veronica, you know you have nothing to worry about."

"I know." she told him quietly.

"There is a reason I stayed single this whole time."

Veronica looked up at him hopefully.

"No one even comes close to comparing to you. It's always been you."

Veronica could feel her cheeks turning pink which caused Logan to laugh. He leaned over and kissed her.

"Do I need to remind you what the ultimate goal is here?"

"No." She gave him a small grin. "I remember what it is."

"I do want you as my wife." Logan reminded her.

"I know." she nodded. "I want that too."

"Good." he gave her another kiss. "OK." he glanced out of the window and looked at the big brick hospital. "Are you ready?"

She shook her head.

"I know but I'll be with you the whole time."

She glanced up at him. "OK. I'll try and be brave here."

Logan cracked a smile. "Come on. Let's go."

After talking with the ER nurse, Veronica found that her father had been transferred out of the ER to a private room on the 4th floor. The elevator ride was in silence but Logan held her hand the whole time. When they arrived at her dad's room, Veronica looked over at Logan who was still holding her hand and he nodded. She quietly pushed the door open and walked in.

They very slowly walked into the room. Keith was sitting up in bed watching the news. He cracked a smile. "There she is."

"Here I am." she told her dad.

"I somehow figured that when you left here, you'd go to Logan." he glanced over at him then. "Hello, Logan."

"Mr. Mars." Logan nodded. "I'd ask how you're doing but considering you're here I think I know."

Keith coughed. "Overall, I'm OK. Not the greatest news granted but still." Keith glanced over at Veronica and sighed. "I really wish you wouldn't have run away, Veronica."

She slowly nodded. "I know."

"However, this time I'm glad you at least ran to Logan vs. doing anything else. I know it's not the news you were hoping for but honey, you had to have at least considered this as a possible reality."

"I don't want to." she sounded like a stubborn little girl.

He sighed again. "Veronica, I know you don't want to but honestly after all the time that has passed with having this, I'm at least more at peace now."

Veronica looked unbelievably sad. "How can you say that?"

"Because honey at some point everyone is going to die." Keith reminded her. "Even if it's cut shorter than we thought I have lived a relatively full life. I am happy with my life. Between my multi-faceted career and my multi-faceted, talented daughter…"

Veronica blushed at the acknowledgment.

"I have had a very good life." Keith told her as he grabbed her hand and gave it a squeeze. "We just need to enjoy the time we do have, OK?"

Veronica slowly nodded. "OK."

"OK, now Logan." Keith turned his gaze over to Logan.

Logan looked over at him. "Yes sir?"

"How are things going?"

Logan quick glanced over at Veronica. He was just a little surprised that Keith was curious about him. "Umm…things are good. Business is good. Family is good…"

Keith raised a curious eyebrow.

Veronica laughed. "Dad he's talking about Trina, I'm sure."

"Oh." Keith nodded.

"Yes, I was talking about Trina. She just had a baby yesterday."

"Ahh…well be sure to extend my congratulations to her."

"I will." Logan nodded.

"So you're an uncle now."

"Yeah, still getting used to that."

"I'm sure you'll be a great uncle."

"I hope so."

The three of them casually chatted for another half hour until Keith was brought his supper. He glanced over his honey glazed chicken and mashed potatoes and gravy. Also included were an apple and vanilla ice cream.

"Logan, could you do me a favor?"

"Sure, Mr. Mars. What is it?"

"Go take my daughter out for a real meal because knowing her she will just sit here and watch me eat and she'll forget all about eating herself."

"I'm not going anywhere, Dad. I don't care if you don't like it."

"OK. How about we compromise?" Logan intervened. "How about we go get something to eat in the cafeteria and then we'll come back up here, OK?"

Veronica sighed, "Fine."

"We'll be back in a little bit, OK?"

Keith nodded a silent thank you to him.

They rode down to the cafeteria in silence. When they arrived, Logan got a burger and fries and a Coke while Veronica got a grilled chicken salad and water.

It was quiet for the first few moments and then Logan asked, "So how's your salad?"

Veronica shrugged, "OK; kind of bland."

"Well, hospital food is not known for being gourmet cuisine by any means." Logan reminded her.

"Yeah, I know."

"Veronica…"

She glanced over at him.

"I know that you're still processing the news. It's good you are."

"But…"

"But don't shut me out, OK?"

"I'm not."

"No, you kind of are. What is it that you're thinking?"

"I'm thinking I'm going to stay here tonight."

"How would you get home?"

"I'll call a cab to take me to your work so I can pick up my car. I just don't want to leave him tonight."

Logan wasn't going to argue. "OK." he nodded.

Veronica was surprised at his reaction. She figured he would tell her she shouldn't. Onto to happier topics. "When does Trina get home from the hospital?"

"Tomorrow morning. I'm going to go see her tomorrow afternoon."

"She's back living in LA now? It's not a temporary thing?"

"Doesn't sound like it. Sounds like it's more permanent."

"Hmm…so what did she name the baby?"

"Mary, I guess."

"Oh…" That would make sense, Veronica told herself.

"What?"

"She named the baby after her mom."

"Her mom?"

"Logan, you know that Trina was adopted right?"

"Yeah, so?"

"So, back senior year when she was directing the school play we found out that Trina's biological mother was Mary who was the cafeteria lady."

"What? How did you figure that out?"

"Mary and my mom were friends growing up. She confessed to my mom that she was having an affair with a faculty member."

"Your mom told you this?" Logan was confused.

"No," she stifled a laugh. "I read about this in her transcript because when mom was unsure what to do she asked Mrs. Hauser who was also a student and another friend at the time what she should do."

"Really? Your mom was friends with Mrs. Hauser?"

"Yeah, I know. Anyway, she spread it around campus and they were called in to the principal's office. My mom recanted and said she made the whole thing up because Mary begged her to. She got suspended for that."

"Wow! So who's Trina's dad? Do you know?"

"Good ol' Principal Moorehead."

Logan nearly choked on his Coke, "Oh my god, are you serious?"

"Yeah, remember when Mr. Clemmons become principal senior year?"

Logan slowly nodded, "Ahh…that would be why."

"Yep, that would be why."

"I'm so shocked I didn't know anything about this. I didn't even realize that Trina had met her birth parents."

"Yeah, I think it was an adjustment at first. Mary was a very sweet lady from what I remember of her."

"She was deaf wasn't she?"

Veronica nodded, "Yeah, mom knew how to sign so that was how they even got to be friends."

"God, so many things happened in high school that I was not even aware of."

"Eh…that's what happens when you sleep slutty trophy wives." Veronica smirked.

"Hey!"

"Sorry, couldn't resist." she took a huge bite of her salad. "I didn't go digging to find this for Trina. I just wanted to see some semblance that my mom was a good person growing up. When I had gotten in trouble for having keys to Clemmon's office, he stuck me in the back room to sort out old transcripts. I found hers. Originally we thought that Celeste might be Trina's mom."

Logan's eyes grew wide.

"Dad did some digging for me and that turned out to be a dead end. It was only after we posted that fake story about Trina being sick did Mary step forward and admit to her that she was Trina's mom."

"Wow." Logan murmured as he ate some of his French fries.

"Yep, so it's not a huge surprise she named the baby Mary."

"You're just super good at finding people's birth parents, are you?"

Veronica blinked, "What does that mean?"

"Well, Mac told me about her parents."

"She did?" she raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah, I spent the whole ceremony at Dick and Mac's wedding trying to figure out why Mr. and Mrs. Sinclair were there. Never in a million years would I have guessed that."

"Ahh…it would be enjoyable to ruin Madison's perfect little life wouldn't it?" Veronica stared off dreamily.

"She doesn't have that perfect little life anymore."

Veronica's eyes lit up in amusement. "Ooo…do tell. This would make my hellish day so much better."

"Well, when I opened the company three years ago, she had actually applied for a job."

"Seriously?"

"Oh yeah. Apparently her trust fund didn't kick in until she was married or 25, whichever came first. Her parents told her they weren't going to support her so she came looking for a job."

"Please tell me she's not working for you."

"Of course not." Logan scoffed at the notion. "She then decided to get married to her boyfriend who she knew less than two months. She got pregnant and her husband then decided to leave her. He left her before her trust fund could kick in."

Veronica let out a heavy sigh. While it was comforting to know that Madison had to resort to working among 'the little people' she made fun of in high school, she did pity her maybe a little for being a single mother. A thought dawned on her. "Wait, did she keep the baby?"

"Ahh…no."

"She gave the baby up?"

"No, she…uh…she lost it."

"Wow!" Veronica blurted out. She then bit her lip. "OK, so I'm feeling guilty now."

Logan nodded.

"So is she still in Neptune?"

Logan shook his head. "No, the last I heard she moved to New York City. She hasn't been home in like 4 years."

"Holy Cow." she murmured.

"Yeah."

"Wow! Real world hasn't really been kind to the 09er's has it?"

Logan shrugged. "Well, some of what's happened is by the person's own actions and then again some are by unforeseeable circumstances."

"So you're saying not all of them are doing bad."

"Not all of them no. Look at Dick. Casey's doing pretty well too. Susan Knight got married and has two more kids besides the one she had her senior year. Carrie supposedly is some model in London."

"Well, good."

"Do you really mean that?"

"There were good people among the group. Granted they were in the minority but I'm glad things are working out for people."

They returned to Keith's room and saw that Cliff was talking to him.

"Hey Cliff." Veronica smiled.

"Hello Veronica. Logan. Surprised to see you here."

"Actually Cliff Veronica and Logan are back together." Keith told him that without any hostility in his voice.

"Really?" Cliff raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"Yep, we are." Logan informed him as he grabbed Veronica's hand.

"Ten's time the charm, huh?" Cliff joked.

"Something like that. Things have changed this time around." Veronica told him.

"How so?"

"Well, this time around the long haul is the bigger picture." Logan admitted.

"Long haul?" Keith repeated. "Have you proposed to my daughter already, Logan?"

"What? No." Veronica replied.

"That's the ultimate goal though. We're both keeping that in mind." Logan added. "I would never propose to Veronica without first asking your permission."

Keith could have passed for taking a collective sigh of relief.

"We're still a ways off from that, dad. Don't worry."

Cliff didn't stay too much longer after that. It was just after 9 when Keith started to feel tired. Or that's what he told Veronica. Veronica was saying to goodbye to Logan when Keith frowned and stopped her.

"Wait a minute. What are you doing?"

"I'm staying here with you." Veronica told him simply.

"Honey, there's not really a good place here to sleep. Just go home. Sleep in your nice comfortable bed. I'm sure you'll be here first thing in the morning anyway."

"Dad…"

"Veronica, I'll be fine. Nothing's going to happen tonight. I promise, OK?" Keith decided to volunteer something that Veronica never thought he would. "Have Logan stay with you if you want."

Logan was surprised at the suggestion too.

"Dad…"

"Veronica, seriously, I'll be fine. I'll see you tomorrow morning, OK?"

Veronica sighed. She never thought she'd lose another battle against him. "OK, fine. I'll see you tomorrow morning." she leaned over and gave him a hug and a kiss.

"Bye honey. See you Logan."

"Bye Mr. Mars."

Logan escorted Veronica out to his Range Rover. "Are you OK?" he asked her as he opened the door for her.

"I guess."

"Veronica, you know he'll be OK." he told her as he slid into the driver's seat.

"Yeah, I know."

"OK, so I'm going to drop you off at my work, I'll swing by my condo and pick up some stuff for work tomorrow, and then head over to your apartment, OK?"

"Sure you want to do this?"

"Of course I do. Why not?"

She shrugged. "Just checking. You don't have to."

"I know but I want to."

"OK."

They arrived back at Logan's work 10 minutes later. Veronica got out and slammed the door. Logan rolled his window down. "Hey." he called to her.

"Hmm…" she turned around.

"Come here."

Veronica smiled as she stood beside the vehicle. She bent her head to give him a kiss.

"I'll be no more than half an hour, OK?"

She nodded. "I'll see you in a little bit."

"Veronica?"

She turned back around. "Yeah?"

"I love you."

She beamed. "Love you too, Logan."

She got in her car and headed home. She took Backup out for a walk because he hadn't been let out since Keith went to the hospital. When she returned 20 minutes later, she saw Logan pulling into the parking lot. And he had something with him that brought a huge smile to her face.

"Is that ice cream I see?"

"It is. Chocolate Chip Mint to be exact."

"Yum." She opened the door to the apartment and took off Backup's leash. Veronica took a seat on the couch while Logan went ahead and got each of them a bowl of ice cream. She took a bite of it and moaned.

Logan had to smirk at that as he sat down beside her. "Been awhile since I've heard you make that noise."

"That's on you." Veronica admitted as she took another bite of the ice cream.

"OK so maybe that's true."

"It's not a maybe; it is true." she swung her feet onto his lap.

She continued to eat her ice cream until she plopped the dish down on the coffee table. She sighed in satisfaction.

"Happy now?"

"Very. I haven't had that kind of ice cream in ages."

"Well, I remember it being one of your favorites."

"You know me so well, don't you?"

"That I do." he took off her shoes and rubbed her feet.

"Seriously? You're going to give me a foot massage?"

"I used to every once in awhile if you remember right."

"Then you'd always try and get me to do it to yours."

"I never succeeded though."

"I just don't think I'd be very good at it."

"You said that about a lot of things."

Veronica smirked, "Yeah I probably did."

"And you did fabulous every time."

Veronica groaned. "Quit lacing everything with sexual innuendoes OK? It's pissing me off." she grumbled as she swung her feet off his lap and headed into her bedroom to change.

Logan sighed. OK so he couldn't understand why she was so pissed off. Scratch that; he understood why, he was just surprised by it. She returned a few minutes later wearing gray t-shirt and gray sleep shorts. She had thrown her hair up in a ponytail. She got out her cell phone and punched #6 on her speed dial and waited through 3 rings.

"Alex, hey it's me. Listen, I probably won't be in until noon tomorrow. Yeah, dad wound up in the hospital. No, no, he's doing OK now. Yeah, I'll be in after I go visit him. No, he sent me home. He wouldn't let me stay there. Yeah, I'm OK. OK, I'll see you tomorrow. Bye."

She sighed in frustration and turned the TV on.

"Going to ignore me now?"

"I've got nothing to say, Logan." she told him as her eyes stayed glued on the TV as she flipped the channels. "There's nothing on." she declared as she glanced at the time. It was 10:30. She turned it off and set the remote on the coffee table. "I'm going to bed. Goodnight."

And with that, she headed to her room without even giving him a kiss goodnight. Logan groaned. He sighed at her coldness. He heard the bedroom door slam shut then and he jumped a little. OK so it was a little beyond coldness. She swung the door open a minute later and set a pillow and a blanket on the chair beside the couch.

"Have fun sleeping on the couch." she told him coldly as she returned and headed back into her room.

"Veronica, wait." he got up and blocked the access to the hallway.

"What, Logan?"

"Why are you so mad?"

"Let's see. You refuse to touch me and you wonder why I'm so mad?"

"I haven't…" he stared at her bewildered.

"You don't want to have sex with me so why should I allow you to sleep with me now?" she tried to push his arm out of the way.

"Veronica, you know that's not true."

"Do I?" she raised an eyebrow. "Where's my proof of otherwise?" This time she was successful. "Just let me go to bed."

"No, not when you're believing such a blatant lie."

"Logan…"

"Veronica, I love you. I love every part of you, OK? You're beautiful, you're smart, and you're undeniably sexy, OK?"

"Could have fooled me." she retorted.

"Stop it," he frowned. "It is taking every part of my very weak willpower to not just put you against the nearest hard surface and fuck you several times over."

Wow, she was just slightly turned on by the visual. "So what is stopping you?"

"Veronica, I'm trying to go about this thinking with the correct head for once." he admitted to her. "I just don't want us rushing here, OK?"

"Fine. Goodnight." she turned to head back into her room.

Logan pulled one of his signature moves then pulled her back to him and kissed her. Veronica tried to put up a fight but ended up giving up. As his tongue slipped into her mouth, his hands slipped under her shirt and touched the super soft skin on her stomach. She pulled away. "Stop it." she growled as she pulled away. "Stop teasing me. It's not fair."

He sighed. "Look, I still want to wait but I was thinking I'd show you just how much I love every inch of you."

Veronica stared at him skeptically. "And just how do you plan on doing that?"

He grabbed her hand and led her to her bedroom. "Well, come here and I'll show you." he slammed the door shut and kissed her again, fiercely. Her hands ran through his hair as he lifted her up and laid her down on her bed. He climbed on top of her and she wrapped her legs around his waist. He bent down and kissed her neck and her collarbone. His hands played with the hem of her shirt and carefully lifted it over her head.

"God, you're gorgeous." he murmured as he kissed his way down her chest.

"You've seen me naked before, Logan." she mumbled as his lips enclosed around her right nipple. She sighed.

"Been quite awhile though." he reminded her. He continued to suckle on her. "Taste amazing." he admitted as he switched sides to the other breast. His tongue flicked across it a few times.

She moaned and Logan grinned. "There's the moan I've missed."

He continued to kiss a path down her body. When he got to her stomach, she felt the nerves jump there. Logan pushed her shorts and her panties down at the same time. The second that his lips touched her, she had to bite her lip to prevent herself from screaming. As soon as his tongue delved into her, she sighed. God, this felt amazing. She had really really missed this. Her fingers raked through his hair as his tongue darted in and out of her.

"God, Logan." Veronica moaned as he sucked on her clit. "Oh god."

"Ready to come, Veronica?" he asked before his tongue delved back into her sweetness.

"God, yes. I'm coming. I'm coming now Logan. Oh god!" she shuddered all over as the orgasm hit her hard.

Logan came up and collapsed on the bed next to her.

It was a few minutes before she spoke; mainly because she was waiting for her breathing and her heart rate to turn back to normal. "Wow!"

Logan chuckled as he kissed her. "Don't ever think this waiting is because I don't want to touch you." He kissed her again. "If I had my way we'd be naked all the time and I'd never let you out of my sight, let alone my bedroom."

Veronica smirked as she put her t-shirt, panties, sleep shorts back on. "And what's stopping that fantasy?"

"Well, unfortunately, I can't run a business that way and sadly, I doubt you can either. I'm sure you'd have some pissed off clients if you tried."

She playfully shoved him. "Logan…"

"Veronica, I love you. I love every inch of you. You know that."

"Good to know because you just may be doing that quite a bit until things change."

"I can think of worse things to do." he smirked as he kissed her. She glanced at the time. "OK, it's 11 o'clock. Time for bed. I want to get to the hospital by 8."

"OK." he nodded as he gave her one last kiss. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight. I love you Logan."

"I love you too, Veronica."

Logan went into the bathroom and changed out of his clothes. When he came back out, he found out that Veronica was already asleep. He wasn't surprised. It had been a long day. He climbed in bed behind her and pulled the covers over them. He then put his arm across her waist and threaded their fingers together. She slept snugly against him. She sighed and Logan grinned. Yeah, it felt good to him too. They had slept this way a lot when they were together freshmen year at Hearst.

Veronica slept soundly that night. Quite frankly the best she had since she had been home. She contributed it to Logan. She really liked this. She felt so safe in his arms. She woke up just before her alarm was set to go off at 7. She didn't want to move but she had to. She slowly snuck out from under his grasp. The second she tried to move though she woke up Logan.

"Good morning." he kissed the back of her head.

"Good morning." she turned around to face him.

Logan grinned. "I like this."

"Like what?"

"Like you, waking up in my arms."

"I like it too." she admitted. "I slept the best I had since I've been home."

"Because of me?"

"I'm beginning to think so." she kissed him then started to move. "Need to get ready though."

He nodded as he got up.

Veronica jumped in the shower and Logan had to do everything in his willpower to not try and join her. They both shared her smallish bathroom as they got ready.

"My god." Veronica stared at herself in the mirror.

"What?"

Veronica turned to him then. "This is what it's going to be like when we get married isn't it?"

Logan chuckled. "Something like it but not exactly. After all, I have a bigger bathroom."

"I have no doubt that you do." she quipped. "So just what do you have in this bigger bathroom?" she threw her arms around his neck.

"The easier question would be what don't I have in this bigger bathroom." he kissed her. "Double sinks, huge shower, huge jetted tub and a fireplace."

Veronica's eyebrows shot up in interest. "You have a fireplace in your bathroom?"

"Well, if you want to get technical, it's one of those see through fireplaces between my bedroom and the bathroom."

"Wow, impressive."

"Well, with what I spent it better be."

"Are you ever going to consider living outside the 09er zipcode?"

"What are you talking about? I did when I lived at the Neptune Grand."

"I guess."

"When I was looking for my condo, I did look all over. I did ultimately choose this place because it's really no more than 5 minutes from Dick and Mac's place and no more than 10 minutes from my work. And it's right on the beach too."

Veronica quietly nodded. OK, she could understand that. "And just how far is this place from here?"

"Depends on if I make the lights. If I do, then it's closer to 15. If I don't, closer to 20."

"Am I going to see it sometime soon?"

"Yes, of course. We'll just need to figure out when and I'll take you over there."

Veronica smiled as she went into her closet and pulled out an outfit and put it on. Both of them were out the door at 5 to 8.

At 10 o'clock, there was a knock on Logan's door at work.

Logan called out for them to come in.

"Hey." Mac entered and closed the door.

Logan looked up and smiled, "Hey Mackie. What's up?"

"Umm…I was going to ask you that."

Logan frowned, "What do you mean?"

"I thought I saw a blur run by my office last night that resembled Veronica."

Logan gave a nervous laugh, "Yeah that was her."

"Did something happen?"

Logan nodded. "Yeah, her dad's in the hospital."

Mac's mouth dropped open. "Oh my god is he OK?"

Logan pondered exactly how to answer that. "He has a lung infection right now. He'll be in the hospital until it clears up."

"Is Veronica OK?"

He sighed, "Not really. The new prognosis is a year, no more than 2."

"Oh no." Mac sank into a nearby chair.

"Yeah, so she ran out of the hospital and came here. I…uh…failed to mention to Kori though that Veronica was my girlfriend so she gave Veronica that whole normal speech she gives all girls who claim they are."

"Ooo…I bet that didn't sit well with Veronica."

"Uh…no."

"Well, if it makes you feel better, Kori feels really guilty."

"She does?"

"Yeah so I came up here last night after you left. Kori said I missed you by 5 minutes. She…uh…kind of asked me about Veronica."

"She did? What did you tell her?"

Mac smiled, "What, are you worried?"

"Well, no."

"I told her the obvious. That Veronica is my best friend and we had been friends for 9 years. I mentioned how you and Veronica have some sort of soul mate connection…"

"You didn't."

"Come on, Logan. You seriously don't believe that?"

"Well, I hadn't thought about it that way."

"Well, everyone else can see it. Anyway, after I told Kori all this, I could tell she felt horrible."

"I told her it was OK. She doesn't know Veronica and she would just think the situation was just like any other girl. She knows now though."

Mac nodded, "So where's Veronica?"

"She went to the hospital. She was going in late to work. Of course I could see her blowing it off altogether until her dad is out."

"I'm not sure about that."

"It's not like her business is going to suffer. She does have Alex."

"Have you met him? God is he hot!" Mac swooned and Logan rolled his eyes.

"Yes I have and he's also married. By the way, you're married too not to mention pregnant with my best friend's baby."

Mac smirked, "I know, I know."

Meanwhile, at the hospital, Veronica had been talking to her dad.

"So are you mad at me for making you go home last night?"

"I could lie and say yes because I was at first but no, I'm not."

"Did you have a good night?"

"I did." she nodded. "Logan stayed with me and when he came over he brought mint chocolate chip ice cream."

"One of your favorites." Keith noted.

"That it is." she nodded. "How was your night here?"

Keith shrugged. "Nobody ever comes to the hospital to sleep." he joked.

"So it was a bad night?"

"Not terrible. Slept a little. Nurses kept coming in every few hours to check on me."

"Has the doctor been in?"

Keith nodded. "Yeah he was in briefly. He told me right now there's not a significant improvement just yet but he didn't expect that so soon anyway."

Veronica looked sad over that statement.

"It'll be OK, Veronica." her dad gave her hand a squeeze.

Veronica's phone rang then she looked at the caller ID. It was Alex calling from work. "Hey Alex. What's up?"

"I need to talk to you about something but first I wanted to see how your dad is doing."

"Well, he seems to be doing OK. No real change just yet."

"Well, keep good thoughts, OK?"

"OK, so what's going on?"

"Well, I have a young lady sitting here in the office asking for you."

Veronica frowned, "Describe her to me."

"I'd say around 18, long blond hair, blue eyes, tall."

"OK so that just described half the women in Neptune. Did you get her name?"

"Grace."

Veronica's eyes widened. "Gr…are you sure?"

"Yeah, do you want her to come back..."

"No!" she told him abruptly. "No, no, no, no. It's amazing that she got away at all. You can have her wait in my office. I'll be there in less than 10 minutes." She hung up her phone and stood up. "Sorry, dad. A witness who I never thought I could get is in my office. I need to go meet her."

Keith nodded, "Sure honey. I understand. I'll see you later, OK?"

She leaned over and gave him a hug and a kiss. "Bye dad."

"Bye Veronica."

She made it to her office in less than 10 minutes. She parked her car and ran inside the building.

She nodded to Alex as she walked in and saw the back of Grace's head first. "Grace." Veronica said and Grace turned around. Veronica could tell Grace was tall just by how high she was sitting in her chair. She had long curly blonde hair and blue-green eyes. She also wore glasses. "Hi Veronica."

Veronica shut her door and took a seat at her desk. "Grace, what are you doing here?"

"I talked to Lizzie."

"You did?"

"Yeah," Grace nodded slowly, "I want to help."

"Grace, I really want you to think about this before you do this. I really appreciate that you want to help but with living with your parents…"

"Lizzie told me I could live with her."

"Well, that's well and good but this is life changing. This is going change your life forever. Your parents may never forgive you for going against them."

"Yeah, well, I don't forgive them for the hell they've put me through." Grace remarked. "I have been looking for the perfect reason to leave and now I have it. I want to help, Veronica."

"I know you do. I would appreciate your help. Duncan would really appreciate your help but you need to make sure you know what you're doing. Your whole life would be made public record."

"Look, Veronica, I've thought long and hard about this. I realize what's going to happen. It's not going to be pretty. I'm aware of that. But the thought of my niece growing up with an upbringing similar to mine, it makes me sick. I don't want her to suffer like I did. I'm sure Duncan's done a good job raising her."

"Do your parents know that Duncan and Lilly are back?"

"I haven't told them. It won't be long I'm sure before they find out but they haven't heard it from me or Lizzie."

Veronica sighed as she looked at the young girl. She looked like her older sister just with glasses and her hair was a little curlier than Meg's. Veronica sighed as she looked at Duncan's file.

"Veronica?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I meet her?"

"I can talk to Duncan and see what we can arrange. I had Lizzie meet them here but I'll see what I can work out, OK?"

"OK." Grace nodded then wrote down on a piece of paper a phone number. "Here's the number to my private phone."

"Your private phone?"

"Yeah, I have the cell phone that my parents gave me but I know they're listening to my calls so I got a disposable cell phone."

"OK." Veronica nodded as she folded up the piece of paper and placed it in the file. "I'll get back to you as soon as I talk to Duncan, OK?"

Grace nodded then rose. "Thanks Veronica."

"Thanks Grace." She looked down at Duncan's file.

Grace stood in the doorway and turned around. "Veronica?"

"Hmm?" Veronica looked up.

"Lizzie told me about your dad. I'm really sorry."

"Oh, thanks. He's doing OK right now. In the hospital but he's OK."

"Well, I'm thinking about you both."

"Thanks Grace. That's sweet of you to say."

Grace nodded then left.

_**Five Weeks Later-Day before Thanksgiving**_

The last 5 weeks had certainly had its highs and lows. Three days after Grace met with Veronica, Grace's parents were made aware of Duncan and Lilly's presence in Neptune. When the Mannings filed the official paperwork to have Lilly removed Duncan's custody, Grace moved out from her parents' house and in with Lizzie. When they tried to stop her, she reminded her parents that she was 18 and was considered an adult. Her parents told her she was officially cut off then. The last thing Grace said to her parents before she left the house was: "I'll see you in court when I testify that Lilly should remain with Duncan." They hadn't spoken since.

Grace was able to meet Lilly the day after she met with Veronica. This meeting though took place at Duncan's house. Lilly was very shy at first but Grace eventually got her to come around. Grace told her stories about Meg and what a great big sister she was. Lilly was more than eager to hear about her mom. Grace had stayed at Duncan's for almost 2 hours until she had to leave for a school function. Lilly gave her the hugest hug before she left. She never let anyone see but when Grace got in her car and drove away she had tears in her eyes. Her niece was the doppelganger of her sister. She was so glad to finally have met Lilly. It was going to make all the pain that the trial was going to bring up worth it, she told herself.

The trial was pending for early next year and in the meantime, Lilly was able to remain in Duncan's custody with the contingency that they surrender their passports. The Mannings argued that it wasn't right but ultimately the judge talked to Lilly privately. Based on her answers he decided that it would be more detrimental to her to remove her from her dad. The Mannings fought as hard as they could but it wasn't enough. They had a good lawyer; Duncan had a shark of one.

Logan and Veronica were still happy. The fights were minimal even though Veronica ended up spending a lot of time with Duncan and Lilly. Logan adjusted to that. He didn't worry as much now. He knew that Duncan's case was huge and it was going to take some time to make sure they would be able to win.

Veronica's dad was doing OK. It had taken him 6 days to get over his lung infection and Veronica had stayed with him in all her free time…well, all the free time that her dad would allow. He did eventually send her home every night.

Logan came over and stayed with her every night. She had come to realize she just slept better in his arms. She fell asleep quicker too. Logan was more than happy to stay with her.

"Seriously, why are you doing this?" Logan sat at the edge of the island as he watched Veronica meticulously make pumpkin pies.

"Uhh…because Thanksgiving is tomorrow?" She reminded him.

"I mean, why do you feel the need to host it? Mac and Dick were more than happy to host it."

"Do you think this place is too small or what?"

"No." Logan gave her a knowing look. "I just thought that with everything that you're going through between your dad's health and the case you wouldn't want to host."

"I asked my dad about this and he said he felt well enough up to it. If he wouldn't have been, I wouldn't have."

"Did you talk to Duncan?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, I did extend an invitation to him and Lilly but they were going up to Napa to be with his parents."

"How is the case coming?"

Veronica sighed, "I'd like to say good. I mean, having Grace's testimony is very crucial to this case. I just…I kind of regret getting her involved."

"Veronica, she wanted to be involved. If she didn't, she wouldn't have came to you. It's not like you badgered the girl. You didn't even talk to her. I think she sees what could happen to Lilly if she has to live with the Mannings."

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, I know. It's not to be open and shut for sure but I think Duncan stands a pretty good shot at winning."

Logan cracked a smile. "Good. I'm glad to hear it."

Veronica yawned as she got up the next morning at 6:30. Mac and Dick were set to arrive around noon. She started to get the turkey ready to be cooked.

"Honey?" Veronica nearly jumped two feet when she heard her dad's voice.

She turned around. "Sorry, dad. Did I wake you?"

Keith shook his head as he took a seat at the island. "No, I was up. Just thinking."

"About something good, I hope."

Keith shrugged.

"Dad…"

"No, Veronica. It wasn't anything bad."

"Not sure I believe you."

"Well, knowing you you'll believe what you want." he told her. "Do you want some help?"

"No, that's OK. I'm good."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I'm getting the turkey ready now. There will also be ham. I know Mac is going to bring some vegetarian dishes for herself. I offered to try and make some but she tells me that she can make them in her sleep so not to worry about it. Pies got baked last night. Everything is good."

"OK." Keith nodded.

"Why don't you go back to sleep for awhile?"

Keith nodded. "OK." Keith retreated back to his bedroom then.

Veronica sighed as she got put the turkey in. There was a knock on her door at just after 7. Veronica frowned as she went over and opened it. She saw Logan standing there holding a covered salad in one hand and clothes to get into later in the other.

He grinned at her, "Happy Thanksgiving." he leaned down and gave a quick kiss.

"Logan, it's 7 in the morning. What are you doing here already?"

"I wanted to help you out."

"Well, thanks but you don't have to do that."

"But I want to." He watched as she moved around the kitchen. He frowned. "Do you want me to go?"

"No it's not that. It's just I don't have anything for you to do right now."

Logan thought for a moment then told her he'd be back in about 15 minutes. When Logan returned, he had breakfast with him.

"What did you do?" she glanced at him up and down and noticed the bag of food and a drink carrier which had two cups which she assumed were filled with coffee.

"Got some breakfast." He started to take the containers out of the bag and set them on the island.

"There are restaurants that are open today?"

"Of course there are. Granted not many but there are some. Sit down." he told her. "Let's eat."

They quietly ate and Veronica smiled at him.

"What?" he asked in between bites.

"Nothing. Just thinking."

"About what?"

"About all the things that I'm thankful for."

"Well, this is the day for it. What tops the list?"

"Well, number three is that my job is going well. I didn't know whether or not I was going to be happy being just a PI again especially in Neptune given the past but things are good."

Logan sighed, "What's number two?"

"That my dad is doing well right now and even if this is the last Thanksgiving we have…."

"Veronica…" That was his warning tone.

"I'm trying to be realistic, OK?" she argued. "Do I hope it's not? Yes of course but it's better to not live in my dream world. My dad doesn't necessarily like it when I do when it comes to him."

"Fine. OK. So what's number 1?"

Veronica threw him a knowing smile, "You of course."

"Me?"

"Oh come on Logan. Of course you're number 1. You've helped out so much in ways you can't imagine."

"Veronica, I think you're giving me too much credit here."

She shook her head, "No I'm not. I'm being very accurate here. You've really helped me out with everything that's going on with dad…"

"That's just part of being a good boyfriend." Logan reminded her.

"Logan…"

"I get it though." he leaned over the island and kissed her.

"So what's your top 3?"

"Well, I'm thankful for my business. I love my job and the people that work for me are great."

"And number two?"

"For life in general."

"Life in general?" Veronica looked confused.

Logan nodded. "There are too many things that could be listed there. I'm thankful that even though I haven't proposed yet I know that we're going to get married…"

Veronica grinned.

"I'm thankful that I have good friends…I'm thankful for my sister and my niece even though I can't stand Trina's fiancé."

Veronica bit her lip to keep from laughing.

"I'm thankful that your dad is alive and doing OK. I'm still hoping that he will be for a long time. I'm thankful for my health and for your health."

Veronica just stared at him in disbelief. That was a big reason for number two. She didn't know what could top it. "OK so what's number 1?"

"For you."

Veronica cracked a grin.

"I was pretty lost before you came home. Sure I had direction businesswise but personally was a completely different story."

"Just going through the motions to fool everybody?" Veronica guessed.

"Yes, exactly." Logan grinned. "How did you know that?"

"Easy. It's basically how I lived life in Quantico."

"Well, there's no doubt about it." Logan concluded.

"What's that?"

"We have a lot to be thankful for." He summed up with a grin.

"That we do." Veronica leaned back over and kissed him.

***Phew* So that was a long chapter. Yes, I've had longer and the ending was not the best but honestly I didn't want to go any further on Thanksgiving. This chapter was long enough as is and I cover a lot again. OK a couple things: 1) The timeline is going to be doing some jumping. Next chapter will be December with Logan's Birthday (which I'm not entirely sure it is in December but for this story it is) and Christmas, the following chapter will be February. Then one for April, one for May and one for June. Like I said I'm speeding things up here. 2) I'm thinking about changing my pen name again. I kind of took off all of my Gossip Girl stories with the exception of one so I'm feeling the need to change the name. The alert should come across for the story anyway but if you see the different name, you'll know. Anyway, review please. Like I said, I'll need something to read tomorrow during the majority of the snowstorm.**


	9. Surfer Girl (aka December)

**My sincerest apologies people! I never meant for this chapter to take this long to do. Honestly this isn't the best chapter. I had a hard time writing it and I needed to get it out before I left tomorrow. I have to see the doctor because I've been having issues. Right now I'm hoping and praying I'm not going to wind up in the hospital. Anyway, I struggled some with this chapter. Sorry about that. Please review and let me know what you thought. Also there's a section in the middle that could be considered M rated. **

* * *

**December 10-4 days before Logan's birthday**

"Come on, tell me." It was a Tuesday afternoon and Veronica and Logan were having lunch in Veronica's office. Papers were scattered all over her desk. Her office door was closed even though Alex wasn't there.

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want anything."

"Yeah, right." Veronica scoffed.

"What's the big deal?"

"The big deal is that it's your birthday, Logan." she reminded him. "And it's actually the first birthday we've been together for in eight years. So maybe I want to commemorate it by getting you something."

Logan sighed. He was losing this battle. "Save your money, Veronica. I already have everything I need. That includes you."

Veronica cracked a smile, "You're so cheesy."

"It's the truth. I don't need anything. If you want, let's go out and we'll eat somewhere really fancy."

"You're so boring." Veronica complained as she ate her salad. "How about you think about it and get back to me on it."

"Fine, fine." he told her as he ate his cheeseburger, "How are things here?"

"Not too bad. Been busy trying to get things ready for Duncan's court case. Other than that, I've had some smaller assignments. How are things going at your work?"

"Good. Now you remember that my Christmas party is next Friday night right?"

Veronica nodded. "Yeah, I remember. Don't worry."

"I can't wait to show you off to everyone." Logan grinned.

"Like I'm some prize you won?" Veronica teased and Logan leaned over and kissed her.

"Like you're my girlfriend and my future wife; I'm going to make sure everyone knows it too." He gave her another kiss. "I'm pretty sure everyone is thinking that you're a myth right now."

"Why is that?"

"Because I've never brought a date to the Christmas parties."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah."

"I'd still be leery with you saying anything about us getting married though."

Logan frowned, "Why is that?"

"Because you haven't even proposed, Logan."

Logan admitted, "Yes, that's true," he paused for a moment, smirking, "but I already know when I'm going to."

Veronica's eyes grew wide, "What? You do? When?"

"It's a surprise, silly." he chuckled.

"Well, you're no fun." she pouted.

"Fine. I'll give you two clues about it."

"OK." Veronica grinned.

"One, it's not going to be on a holiday."

"So I should rule out getting an engagement ring for Christmas."

"Yes that would be right. Or Valentine's day for that matter."

"You're talking that far in advance?" Veronica raised a curious eyebrow.

"Yes, I am." he grinned. "Number two, it'll be at someplace you least expect."

"That's not a very good clue." she pouted.

"Well, too bad. That's all you're getting until it happens."

Veronica sighed. "Fine."

Logan bit back a smile at her frustration. He rose, "I need to go though." he kissed her again. "I'll talk to you later, OK?"

"OK."

"I love you."

"I love you too." One last kiss and he headed for the door. "Oh," he turned around, "surfing."

Veronica looked confused, "What about it?"

"My birthday present?" he reminded her. "You're coming surfing with me."

"Logan…" she sighed in resignation "I haven't been surfing in like 10 years."

"No time like the present to try it again."

Veronica looked apprehensive.

"Hey you asked me what I wanted and that's what I want."

"I meant something I could buy you."

"But I told you that I didn't want to buy me anything. Come on, Veronica. It would be really nice to see you back on a surfboard."

She sighed. "OK, fine."

"What are you so worried about?"

"I'm not worried." she insisted.

"Sure you're not." Logan smirked.

"Bye, Logan."

Logan nodded then headed out. After she checked the hallway and had confirmation that Logan had left, Veronica went back into her office and punched in a phone number. It rang a couple times before someone answered.

"Hi Dick, it's Veronica. Yeah, I know; I'm sure you are surprised. Listen, I have an idea for Logan's Christmas present and I need your help picking it out. Why yes, that's exactly what I had in mind. Are you busy after work today? You just want to meet me here at my office? OK. I'll see you around 5:30. Thanks, Dick. Bye." Veronica sighed. Fine; if Logan didn't want a birthday present that was fine. She'd just had to get him a bigger Christmas present. She had been thinking about getting him a new surfboard and now was the perfect time to do it. With Dick along to help, he would be able to help her pick out a really great one.

It was just after 5:30 when Dick arrived at Veronica's office. Alex had returned to the office around 3 so Dick saw him first.

"Can I help you?" Alex asked.

Dick nodded an acknowledgement, "Oh hey, I'm looking for Ronnie."

Alex glanced through the open office door, "Hey, I thought I was the only one who called you Ronnie."

Veronica smirked at him as she appeared in the doorway, "He's the one that actually started the nickname."

"Hey Ronnie." Dick grinned impishly.

"Dick. Of course when he started it, it was mainly to piss me off though."

"Why didn't you tell me that?" Alex frowned.

Veronica grinned, "It's not a big deal. I've gotten over it." She looked in between them. They both looked like they were waiting for an introduction." Sorry, Alex, this is Dick Casablancas, Logan's best friend. Dick, Alex Meyers, my partner."

They quickly shook hands.

"He's helping me pick out Logan's Christmas present."

"What are you getting him?"

"Surfboard." Veronica told him as she put her purse strap on her shoulder.

"Really? You surf?" Alex asked Dick.

"Yes, he and Logan are known for their surfing. They both do rather well."

"Wow, I don't think I've ever heard you say that, Ronnie. Thanks."

Veronica cracked a smile.

"And what about you, Veronica?"

Before Veronica could answer, Dick answered for her, "Nah, she doesn't surf."

"Yes I do."

Dick chuckled, "It's OK, you know."

"Yeah I haven't in a very long time but I have surfed before."

"Oh yeah? When?"

Veronica hesitated, "Back before Lilly died. Just once. Logan tried to teach me."

Everyone got quiet so Veronica added, "And apparently I'm going out on Saturday too."

Dick's eyes grew wide, "What? You are?"

Veronica sighed, "Yes, I am. I asked Logan what he wanted for his birthday and he told me to go surfing with him."

"So do I get to come along and watch you?"

"And laugh your ass off at me? Get real." Veronica scoffed. "Come on, let's go. Almost done, Alex?"

"Yeah, I'll be leaving in about 10 minutes."

"OK, make sure you do. See you tomorrow."

Veronica took off with Dick then.

When they got to Veronica's Saturn, Dick told her, "Nah, let's take mine instead."

"Why?"

"Because you don't know where to go."

"Is it really that complicated giving me directions to get there?"

"Kind of. It's not in town."

Veronica sighed. "OK. Fine."

They climbed into Dick's car and headed out of town.

"Hey, so has Logan met that guy?"

"Who Alex?"

"Yeah."

"Yeah, he's met him. Why.?"

Dick shrugged, "I don't know. I figured he might get jealous."

Veronica laughed, "First of all, Alex was my former partner in the FBI. Second, he's married and has a couple kids. And third, Logan knows he's got nothing to worry about. It's refreshing to know that he doesn't plan to interfere in my job as far as Alex is concerned."

"You sure about that?"

"100 percent positive."

Dick drove Veronica into LA and they went through the shop he always went to to get a new surfboard. He himself had recently gotten one within the last 3 months. He made sure that Veronica got a good deal. It was expensive, but she honestly thought she'd have to fork over twice as much so Dick's help was much appreciated.

**Saturday, December 14, Logan's Birthday, 7 am**

Logan knocked quietly on the door. A few moments later, Keith appeared at the door in his bath robe to answer.

"Logan." Keith nodded with a yawn.

"Mr. Mars." Logan gave a sheepish grin, "Sorry, did I wake you?"

"Nah." Keith yawned again. "Been up for about 10 minutes."

"How about your daughter? She up?"

Keith gave a small chuckle, "Yeah, she's up. I knocked on her door when you got here and told her you were here. Heard her fly out of bed and mutter some expletives."

Logan grinned, "Sounds like her."

"So Veronica said something about surfing."

"Yeah, she asked what I wanted for my birthday. I told her we were going surfing."

"Ahh…that's right. Happy Birthday."

"Oh, thanks."

"Did she start lodging protests about that?"

"Yes." Veronica grumbled as she opened the door and came out dressed a gray t-shirt and black jean shorts."I did. I asked for something to buy and this is what was he wanted."

"Nice to see you so chipper, honey." Keith teased.

Logan chuckled. "I really don't get what you're so worried about, Veronica. It's not like this is the first time you've tried surfing."

"First time in 10 years. Lilly was still alive the last time I tried it."

"Like I said before, no time like the present to try it again." Logan smirked.

"Yeah, yeah. Be right back." Veronica turned and headed back into her room and grabbed her old book bag. She had thrown together a few things she wanted to take to the beach with her and of course, Logan's birthday present. She didn't buy it technically. She slung the bag over her shoulder and headed out.

"Bye dad." Veronica gave her dad a hug and a kiss and headed out with Logan. When they arrived at his Range Rover, Veronica reached up and gave him a kiss.

"Happy Birthday." she gave him a big smile.

"Thank you." he gave her a kiss then. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah." she nodded as she got in the passenger side and buckled her seat belt. "So where are we heading?"

"Trestles."

Veronica's eyes grew wide, "Trestles?"

"Yeah." he was surprised to see Veronica's surprised expression, "It's a good place for beginner surfers to learn."

"Umm…don't you live at the beach?"

"I do but I figured we should do a little road trip."

"OK." Veronica shrugged. "It is your birthday."

Logan grinned. "That's right. It is."

Veronica yawned then closed her eyes.

"Are you seriously going to sleep?"

"How far of a drive is it?" she yawned.

"Around an hour." he frowned at her. "Why are you so tired?"

"Because I was putting together your birthday present."

"Veronica…" Logan groaned. The damn girl never listened!

"Would you relax?" she cracked an eye open. "I didn't buy it. It's something I've had that I want you to have."

"What is it?"

"Like I'm going to tell you." Veronica scoffed. "You'll get it after we go surfing." Her eyes drifted back shut.

It was almost an hour later when they opened. Logan was still driving but he was using his right hand to wake her up. "What?" she mumbled. "Vehicle is still moving so I know we're not there yet."

"We almost are though. Wake up."

Veronica slowly sat up, "What time is it?"

"Just after 8."

It was 10 minutes later when Logan pulled in at the beach. It was really nice out. Not just weather wise but it appeared that there were only a few people in the water surfing. She wasn't going to have to worry about how many people were going to see her end up in the water constantly. Then again, it was still early so that could change.

Logan dug around his stuff and found the old wetsuit Veronica had worn and handed it to her. She quickly took off her jean shorts and stepped into it pulling it up past her teal bikini bottoms. She then pulled the t-shirt over her head and revealed the teal bikini top to match. She tossed both into Logan's Range Rover and put her arms through the sleeves. Logan zipped it up in back for her.

"Still fit OK?"

Veronica glanced down, "Looks like it. Are you going to change?"

Logan changed into his wetsuit and zipped it up all under 30 seconds.

By eight-thirty they were in the water. Veronica had remembered some of the basics. It didn't take long to recall what to do when she fell off and she had to protect her head from the board hitting it.

Logan didn't laugh at her. He made a promise that no matter how many times she fell in he wouldn't laugh at her. He kept his promise too.

By 11 o'clock they headed to shore to get something to eat. Veronica got a strawberry banana smoothie and a protein bar. Logan got a pomergranate blueberry smoothie and a protein bar too.

"Are you having fun?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, I am. Spending just as much time in the water as I did last time."

"Veronica, you haven't surfed in 10 years. Did you think that it would magically make you a better surfer?"

Veronica sighed, "Well, no."

"It'll take time but you'll get there."

"Are you trying to tell me we're going to be making this a regular thing?"

"Well, I would like to." Logan sipped his smoothie.

"Well, I'll think about it." Veronica took a bite of her protein bar and a drink from her smoothie.

"Hey Veronica! Logan!"

Both turn around and see Duncan and Lilly heading towards them.

"Duncan! What are you doing here?" Veronica asked surprised.

"Lilly and I had just spent a few days at Disneyland. We were just coming back from there. "

"Hi Aunt Veronica! Hi Uncle Logan!" Lilly cheerfully waved.

"Hi Lilly." They told her in unison.

"Veronica…" Duncan glanced at her appearance. "Wetsuit? Is it possible Logan actually got you to go surfing again?"

"Amazingly he did. It's his birthday present."

Duncan smiled. "That's right. Happy Birthday."

"Thanks man."

"We were just going to go swim for a little bit. Are you going back out?"

"Yeah." Logan nodded. "We're just finishing this then we'll be back out."

"OK. We'll see you maybe a little later."

"Sounds good." Logan paused for a moment. "Hey Duncan?"

Duncan turned around, "Yeah?"

"Could do me a real quick favor?"

"Sure."

Logan quickly headed back up to his Range Rover and came back with his digital camera. "Can you take a picture of me and Veronica together? Who knows when I'll get another chance to get her back in the water to surf again and I'd like to commemorate it."

"Umm…sure."

Duncan took the camera and after Logan had set the boards up behind them, Duncan snapped the picture.

"Thanks, DK. I appreciate it."

"Not a problem. We'll see you out there."

Logan took his camera back to his car and came back as Veronica was finishing her smoothie. "Ready to go back?"

"Sure."

They returned to the water at almost 12. Duncan and Lilly were swimming very close to shore. However they were still able to watch Veronica and Logan surf. Within an hour, Veronica was standing on her board without falling over immediately. She was even able to catch a few small waves. By the time they came back out of the water at 3, Duncan and Lilly were sitting on the sand on a blanket eating some snacks.

"So how did that go?" Duncan asked.

"I think pretty good." Veronica admitted.

"She's catching on. It'll take a little time but I thought she did really well."

"Aunt Veronica, I saw you and uncle Logan surfing." Lilly exclaimed as she took a bite of a cookie.

"Really? What did you think?"

"You looked like a surfer girl." Lilly told her.

All three of them got a good laugh at that.

"Well, at least I'm fooling her."

"Oh come on, V. You did look like a surfer girl." Logan told her. "And you are. You're my surfer girl." He told her as he gave her a kiss.

Logan and Veronica hung out with Duncan and Lilly for another hour before they decided to leave. As soon as they got into Logan's Range Rover, Veronica reached for book bag and got Logan's presents out.

Logan sighed as he looked at them, "I really wish you would have listened."

"Yeah, me too. I told you I didn't buy them. Now open them up."

Logan tore into the smaller present first and found it was a mix CD. "Wow! This is great. What's all on here?"

"You'll have to play it to find out." Veronica teased. "Now open the other one."

Logan opened the next one and found it was a picture of them at Thanksgiving. It was taken at Veronica's house while they were eating dinner. "Thank you. I love it." He gave her a kiss. "I love you."

"I love you too." She kissed him again.

**Friday, December 20****th****, 5 days before Christmas**

At six-thirty, Logan knocked on Veronica's apartment door. He was dressed in a Ralph Lauren tuxedo.

"Logan." Keith nodded.

"Mr. Mars." Logan nodded as he shook his hand. "How are you feeling?"

Keith shrugged, "Pretty good. Why don't you come in? Veronica's almost ready."

"Oh thanks." Logan followed him in.

"So I haven't seen you in about a week. How are you doing?"

"Good. Been busy with work."

"And Veronica?" Keith guessed.

Logan grinned, "Yes, I've been busy with her too."

Keith cleared his throat, "You know, Logan, we haven't really gotten to talk since you and Veronica started to date again…"

Logan's face went expressionless. He was preparing himself for the worst.

"I would say that I'm surprised by it but I'm really not."

Logan was unsure what to make of that statement.

"What I am surprised about is how much my daughter is smiling now."

Logan cracked a smile then.

"I haven't seen her smile so much since she's been home and it's been really nice to see it again. And I know I have you to thank for it."

Logan was pleasantly surprised by his admission.

"Thank you Logan. Whatever you're doing to help Veronica, thank you. I appreciate it."

"You're welcome, Mr. Mars."

Keith gave him a knowing smile, "You know, Logan, you're 26 now. You can call me Keith."

"OK. Keith."

"So Veronica said you're headed to your company's Christmas party?"

"Yeah, I rented out the Neptune Grand Ballroom for the event."

"That's great."

"Listen, Mr…sorry, I mean Keith. I kind of have something special planned for Veronica tonight."

"Are you planning on proposing to my daughter, Logan?"

Logan's eyes grew wide. "What? No, no. Not yet anyway. However, I do have something planned to show her how serious I am about her."

Keith nodded.

"I do love her and like I said before when the time comes for when I'm going to propose, I will ask for your permission first."

"Thank you, Logan. I take it you're telling me this so I don't worry when she doesn't come home tonight?"

"Well, ultimately I'm going to leave the decision up to her but yes."

"OK. Thank you for letting me know."

Veronica could be heard walking down the hallway due to the noise her heels were making. Logan stood up as she entered the living room. She stood in front of him wearing a gold beaded, spaghetti strapped mini dress that hit her right at mid-thigh and gold heels. Her makeup was kept a little on the sultry side and her hair was done in loose waves. She had on her pearl earrings and her Love necklace.

Logan's mouth nearly hit the floor. "Wow! You look amazing." he gave her a quick kiss.

"Thanks." she told him shyly. "You look very handsome yourself."

"Thanks." Logan extended his arm to her. "Shall we?"

"We shall." she told Logan but first turned to her dad. "Goodnight dad. Love you." she gave him a hug and a kiss.

"Love you too, sweetheart. See you tomorrow."

Veronica stared at her dad, confused then at Logan who still had his arm held out to her. She took it and was escorted out of the apartment.

As soon as they were outside, Veronica put her purse strap on her shoulder and asked, "OK what was that about?"

Logan threaded their fingers together, "What was what about?"

"What was with my dad saying 'see you tomorrow'?"

"Nothing. I just said that I had something special planned for us."

"You told him I wouldn't be home?"

"I said it would be up to you." Logan clarified.

When they walked into the ballroom, there were around 60 people already there, including Mac and Dick. Veronica noticed them right away. Dick had a black tuxedo on and Mac wore a deep red knee length Halston sleeveless silk dress. She was beginning to show more now.

"Wow! You look great." Veronica told her as she hugged her.

"Thanks. So do you."

"Hey Dick." Veronica nodded to him.

"Hey Ronnie. Wow! You look smoking hot tonight."

Veronica groaned, Mac smacked her husband, and Logan told him that he was going to ignore he said that.

Logan spent the next hour introducing Veronica to people he worked with. They were all very courteous to her, even if some of them looked surprised when Logan introduced her as his girlfriend.

Veronica was getting herself a drink when she heard someone call her name. She turned around and saw Casey Gant heading toward her, along with Kori behind him.

"Oh…hey Casey." she gave him an awkward hug due to holding her drink. "Good to see you. How have you been?"

"Doing good. How have you been? I heard about your dad."

"I'm OK. He's doing OK. Prognosis isn't great but he's doing OK."

"Good. I'm glad he's doing OK."

"Yeah." she nodded. "Still getting used to people knowing about him being sick."

Casey gave her a knowing grin, "Come on, Veronica. You know that Neptune isn't that big." he then turned back to Kori. "Hey, have you met my wife, Kori?"

Veronica gave a sheepish grin, "Yeah, we met a couple of months ago."

"Yeah, a little bit of an awkward meeting." Kori admitted to her husband. "Listen, I just want you to know that I'm sorry about…"

Veronica brushed it off, "It's OK. Logan told me just how…" she glanced around nervously, "often that happens."

Casey smirked, "Are you worried, Veronica? Cause honestly you shouldn't be. I mean, this is the 1st year that Logan even brought a date."

"Oh my god, he was serious? I thought he was kidding when he told me that."

Casey and Kori laughed. "No." Kori told her. "It's true."

Veronica scanned the room again, "Is that why everyone is looking surprised when he introduces me?"

"It is." Casey grinned."You know Veronica I was beginning to wonder if you and Logan were ever going to get back together."

"Casey, Logan and I didn't even date when you were in school. How did you even know that?"

"Aw, sure we dated when Casey was in school, sugar puss." Logan gave Veronica a quick kiss. "Remember that fake birthday party my dad threw? He was there."

Casey nodded, "That's right."

Veronica glared at Logan, "What have I told you about using that nickname in public?"

"That you love it?" Logan kissed her cheek.

"Logan…"

"Come with me please." he started to lead her away. "Have a good night, Casey and Kori."

"You too." They answered in unison.

Ten minutes later, they ate and Logan made a speech. Veronica had to smile. She was so proud of him. They talked with the people at their table and discussed various things, including Veronica's job. A lot of them were intrigued.

At nine-thirty, Logan and Veronica headed to the dance floor along with a bunch of other people. Veronica kept her arms around Logan's neck and his hands were around her waist.

"You know, Dick was right." he informed her as he twirled around on the dance floor.

"About what?"

"You do look smoking hot tonight."

Veronica grinned. "Well, thank you."

"I think you've impressed them all."

"You know what I'm amazed about?"

"What's that?"

"Everyone was giving me weird looks when you were introducing me."

Logan frowned at her. "Weird looks?"

"Yeah. Well, I guess surprised may be a better word. Then I talked to Casey and Kori and they told me that it was the first year you brought a date to this party."

"I've already told you that." he reminded her.

"Yeah, I know. I didn't think you were seriously though."

"Of course I was serious."

"You didn't bring anyone? Not even Trina?"

"No I brought Trina. I don't count her as a date."

Veronica held back a laugh, "So what the difference between having Trina as a date and having an actual date?"

"This." he leaned down and kissed her softly. It lasted a few seconds then she pulled away.

"Can't do that with my sister. Actually, scratch that. I wouldn't want to do that with my sister."

Veronica giggled as she looked around. They were being watched. "Apparently we have an audience."

Logan then noticed everyone and grinned, "Is it bothering you?"

"No, just an observation."

"I think they're just so fascinated that you have me smiling so much." he leaned forward and gave her another kiss.

"That must be it."

At 11 o'clock, Logan drove them back to his place in the 09er zip code. It was a huge 2500 square foot condo with 3 bedrooms and 3 ½ bathrooms. It had huge windows and deck doors that could be pushed in to give an amazing indoor/outdoor feeling. Best of all, the ocean was less than a 100 steps away from Logan's deck.

"Wow! That's an incredible view, Logan." Veronica noted as she made her way onto the deck. "Explain to me again why when we've been back together for 2 ½ months this is the first time I've seen where you live?"

"We've never had the time."

"That's a lie and you know it." Veronica said in a sing-song voice.

"No, it's true." he argued. "Maybe it's just because…" he leaned down and kissed her. "I was waiting until I could have my perfect night with you."

"And has it been?"

"So far." he kissed her. "Hoping that's going to continue."

Veronica smirked, "Need I remind you yet again that your 'perfect night' could have happened plenty of times before tonight including your birthday."

"Well, that would have been kind of hypocritical of me, wouldn't it?"

"True."

"Come on." he grabbed her by both hands and led her inside. "Come with me and we'll get something to drink then I'll give you a tour."

She followed him into the kitchen. It was completely modern with slate floors and black granite countertops and bamboo cabinets.

"How about we end the tour in your bedroom?" she told him presumptuously.

Logan cocked an amused eyebrow, "Oh really?"

Veronica gave him a knowing smile and slugged him, "Because if Dick listened like he was supposed to, your Christmas present is there."

Logan found a bottle of champagne and 2 champagne flutes, filling them both. He handed her one and they made a toast. Logan quickly showed her around to each of the bedrooms and bathrooms and the huge game room that a pool table, dartboard, and in case he wanted to watch anything, a huge 65" TV. Logan literally did have every amenity she could think of.

"This is fabulous." she commented.

"Yeah, I got a little spoiled." he admitted as he swung the double doors to his bedroom. "Especially in here."

Veronica stepped in and gazed around. The fireplace that Logan had talked about was easy to spot. "Holy cow Logan!" she exclaimed as she peered into his bathroom which was roughly twice as big as her bedroom at her dad's apartment.

"Yeah, I know." Logan smirked. "Go look at the closet."

She looked and noticed that they didn't seem to be an end to the room. She decided to venture in then. She came out a few minutes later and told him, "You can get lost in there."

"I almost thought you did." Logan grinned at her as he turned around and saw his present leaning against the corner by his deck door. "Veronica?"

"Yes?" she responded with a grin.

"What is that?" he pointed to the long, tall object against the wall.

"Your Christmas present."

"You bought me a surfboard?" he stared at her, stunned.

"I did." she confirmed as he went over to look at it. It was a turquoise colored long board surfboard. "Do you like it? I got turquoise because it reminded me of the ocean."

"It's very, very nice." he admitted hesitantly.

"What's wrong?" she frowned.

"It's just…I know how expensive this must have been…"

"It's not as bad as you think." Veronica informed him. "I took Dick with me and he helped me pick one out for you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, he got them to knock down the price some too."

"Well, I'm impressed, Mars."

Veronica smirked, "Well, thank you Echolls."

"Thank you." he gave a kiss. "I love it."

"You're welcome."

Logan told her to take a seat on his bed. Veronica obliged as she watched him as he opened his nightstand drawer and pulled out her present. He placed it in her palm.

"Logan…" Veronica stared intently at the present.

"Yes?" he grinned as he took a seat on the bed next to her.

"This is small enough to be a ring box. Is this a ring box?"

"Why don't you open it and find out?"

Veronica ripped the paper off and stared in awe at the small ring box in her hand. "Logan…"

"I wasn't lying to you." he cut her off. "If you remember right I told you I wasn't proposing on any holidays."

"It's not a holiday." she reminded him, her eyes never leaving the box.

Logan smirked, "Yes, technically that's true but we are celebrating Christmas and I told you that it was going to be after Valentine's Day. It's not the engagement ring. It is something to show you how serious I am about wanting to marry you though."

Her eyes were still on the box.

"Would you just open it already?" he laughed.

Veronica nodded and slowly opened the box. There sat a rose gold promise ring. It was in the shape of an infinity symbol and held a heart-shaped birthstone on each side. VAM was engraved by Veronica's birthstone and LAE was engraved by Logan's.

"Logan!" she gasped.

"So do you like it?" he pressed.

"Of course I do. It's beautiful!" she exclaimed.

"There were a few different designs I was debating between but I ultimately decided to go with the Infinity design. He removed the ring from the box and slid it onto her left ring finger. "I thought about putting our names but I decided initials should be enough. After all, I'm sure you can figure out which birthstone is yours," he pointed to the peridot, "and which one is mine." he pointed to the blue topaz.

"Very true. It's gorgeous, Logan." she kissed him. "I love it." she kissed him again. "Thank you." Another kiss.

"You're welcome." he told her as they both took drinks from their respective glasses. He reached over and grabbed the remote on his nightstand. It wasn't for the TV though. He pressed a button and the fire sprang to life.

"Ooo…impressive." Veronica commented.

"I try." Logan grinned as he rose. He set both of their glasses on the nightstand then grabbed her hands and led her over to the fireplace.

"What are you doing?"

"Well, I was hoping you'd dance with me."

"Logan, we've already danced tonight."

"True." Logan flipped the stereo on a remote on top of the fireplace. "But not to this song." he hit play and Sway started to play. Veronica's eyes lit up.

"Ahh… is this the CD I made for you?" she asked as she wrapped her arms around his neck and Logan's arms went around her waist, just above her hips.

"But of course." he grinned as he brought her in as close as he could.

"So what's this all about?"

"I just wanted to have a better memory to this song." Logan rationalized as his hands glided up and down her back.

"The first one wasn't the greatest." she agreed with a sigh.

"Do you have any idea how much restraint it took to not kiss you that night?"

"A lot?" she guessed.

"You have no idea." he told her.

"What's stopping you now?"

Logan grinned, "Not a damn thing." he admitted as he leaned down and kissed her. She parted her lips and Logan let his tongue dip inside her mouth. Veronica moaned as Logan's hands slid further down to her butt. Eventually they broke the kiss.

"Veronica…" he whispered. Their foreheads were pressed together.

"Hmm…"

"Stay with me tonight."

"I thought you already told my dad I was."

Logan kissed her neck. "I told him I'd ask but it was entirely up to you."

She pushed his head back to hers and kissed him hard.

His hands were now resting on the spaghetti straps of her dress. "Veronica?"

"Hmm…"

"Say you'll stay with me tonight."

She gazed up into his eyes. She smiled. "OK." she nodded. "I'll stay with you."

Logan grinned as he kissed her again. Her hands pushed down his tuxedo jacket and let it fall to the floor. Next was his tie and shirt. Veronica dropped her arms so that Logan was able to push the spaghetti straps down and the dress fell to the floor. The only clothes that were still on her were a pink strapless bra and matching panties. Her bra quickly came off.

"You're still the most beautiful woman I know, Veronica."

"So how many times have you used that line before?" she teased.

"Just with you."

"Yeah, right."

"I'm serious." He kissed his way down her neck to her throat. "Nobody's held a candle to you, Veronica." He guided her over to his bed and laid her down gently on top. He then climbed on top of her, gazing down on her and took note of her expression. "What's wrong?" he asked.

Veronica quickly shook her head, "Nothing's wrong." she insisted. "I was just thinking of how good this feels."

Logan smiled, "I've missed this."

"I have too."

"I love you so much, Veronica."

Veronica broke out in a huge grin, "I love you too Logan."

His lips traveled down her neck, to her throat, to the valley between her breasts. His hands gently cupped them and his thumbs brushed across her nipples.

Veronica sighed low in her throat and brought him in closer. Logan replaced his fingers with his lips and suckled on her left breast. She started to moan and as Logan moved his lips over to her other breast, his fingers crept inside her panties. He inserted a couple fingers and began to rub at her clit. She kept pressing down into his hand.

"Logan…god. I'm coming, Logan."

He quickly removed her panties and bent down and licked into her. She ran her fingers through his hair as his tongue darted in and out of her.

"God Logan. Don't stop. Don't stop. I'm coming. I'm coming. Oh god!" She cried as the orgasm hit her.

Logan came back up beside her and kissed her.

He grinned, "Music to my ears, sweetheart." he kissed her and when he pulled away he noticed something interesting. He chuckled, "Oh my god, is Veronica Mars actually blushing?"

"Oh shut up." she nudged him.

"But I don't think I want to and I know that I don't want you to."

She grinned; the color hadn't disappeared yet though.

"I'm just so shocked by this." he admitted. "Why are you blushing?"

"Because you're being so sweet."

"Well," he pulled her on top of him, "it's the truth. I love you."

"I love you too, Logan." she leaned down and kissed him. "So where are they?"

Logan sat up at an incline to reach over and pull out a condom from his nightstand and handed it to her. First things first though. She got off him long enough to remove his boxers and tossed them on the floor. As she tore the wrapper open, she glanced down at him and held in a smirk.

"Are you going to start blushing on me again?" he teased. "It's not like you haven't done this before you know."

"No." she shook her head slowly, her eyes were on the condom wrapper as she removed it, "I was just thinking about the first time you made me do this." She put the condom on him and then slid him inside her.

"I didn't make you do anything." Logan informed her and Veronica smirked.

"Yeah, right." she leaned down and kissed him. "'Oh come on Veronica. There's nothing to be afraid of. Why don't you just try it?'" she mimicked him to a tee. "You and your peer pressure." she remarked and Logan bit his lip.

"What?"

Logan turned them over so that he was hovering above her."You talk too much." he moved inside her slowly. He leaned down and kissed her.

"I do not."

He moved almost out of her and then plunged back into her. Veronica's eyes rolled back in her head. "Oh god." she moaned as he moved in and out of her.

All the feelings were coming back to her. They had hibernated for awhile but they were still there. Logan knew what worked for Veronica so that was why it only took 5 minutes before she came. Logan followed shortly after.

Ten minutes later, they laid under the covers tangled up in each other. Logan grinned as he glanced down at her. Veronica had her head resting against his chest. She also had a huge smiled on her face.

"I've missed this." he kissed the top of her head.

Veronica looked up at him, "Which one, the sex or me?" she teased.

He grinned, "The sex with you."

She smiled, "Wow! That was incredibly cheesy."

Logan chuckled.

"It was amazing however. Had it always been that amazing?"

He feigned hurt. "Oh no. Your memory is fading. I think it's time you get another reminder." he told her as he lifted her up and slid her on top of him. She giggled as he kissed her.

The next thing Veronica remembered was feeling her hair being kissed. Her eyes cracked open and she could tell it was still dark out. Her back was to Logan in a spooning position and Logan's arm was over her waist and their fingers were threaded together. They had slept this way a lot when they were together in the past.

Veronica could feel Logan start to pull away so she clutched onto him. "Where do you think you are you going?" she yawned as she turned over to face him.

He gave her a small kiss. "I want to try out the new surfboard you got me."

"It's dark out, Logan."

"It's 7 o'clock." he reasoned. "Won't be much longer and the sun will be up."

She released his hand and sat up, "Hold on. I'll come watch you."

"No, go back to sleep. You need it." he told her as he got up to change into his wetsuit.

"Why is it I need it and you don't?"

"Because I can survive on just a few hours of sleep." he came out of his closet in his wetsuit. He gave her another kiss. "I won't be long and then I'll come back and make you breakfast."

Veronica grinned as he gave her one last kiss. "I love you Logan."

"I love you too, V." He murmured as he left.

She fell back against the pillows. Her eyes drifted shut and the next time she opened them, it was 9:27. The sun was streaming in through the window. She slowly sat up and stretched. She glanced down at his nightstand and there, next to his lamp, sat the picture of them together at Thanksgiving. It was their first official picture as a couple. Veronica cracked a smile as she put the picture back down and made her way into the bathroom. She glanced around and grinned when she saw the tub. Yeah, they had made love in it last night. Total, they made love 3 times that morning. It had been just after 4 when they had fell asleep.

Veronica decided to take a shower and wash her hair. It was in desperate need of it. As soon as she had gotten her hair wet, she felt a set of arms wrap themselves around her waist. Veronica jumped and Logan chuckled.

She sighed as she turned around. "You scared me." she told him.

"You're in my shower and I scared you?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Yes." she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. "How was surfing?"

"Great." he admitted as he stood under the other shower head. "I love that surfboard." he referred to his Christmas present. "It worked great."

Veronica smiled. "Good. I'm glad."

"What do you feel like having for breakfast?"

"Surprise me." she told him as she was washing her hair.

"No, no narrow it down for me. What sounds good? Pancakes? Eggs? French Toast?"

"Hmm…how about pancakes and eggs?"

"OK. Sure." he gave her a brief kiss then got out of the shower. "Take your time."

It was 20 minutes later when Veronica came into the kitchen. Logan left a pair of boxers and one of his t-shirts on his bed for her to change into given her only other clothes was the dress she wore the night before.

He grinned as he turned around from the stove. "I like you wearing my clothes."

Veronica smirked as she stood behind him. "I like wearing them too."

He gave her a quick kiss, "Sleep OK?"

She nodded, "Yeah pretty good." she told him as she watched him flip pancakes. "How you can survive on such little sleep is beyond me."

He grinned, "I'm used to it. Takes me back to those weekends in high school when I partied late and still get up early in the morning to surf."

"And you did do that nearly every weekend didn't you?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

Veronica scanned the stove and noticed how he had 3 of the burners going with food. "What do you want me to do?"

"Nothing. Just sit down."

She glanced at the table in the nook and noticed how the plates, silverware, and glasses were already set up. "Wow!"

Logan smiled as he brought the pancakes and the eggs over to the table. "Dig in." He told her as he grabbed the orange juice from the fridge and set it on the table. He had also made some bacon and was in the process of putting it on a plate to bring over. Veronica took the cap off the orange juice and filled her glass up. As she set it back down, her eyes gazed at the ring on her left ring finger. It was so beautiful. She had noticed how the metal was rose gold and at first Veronica was surprised that Logan chose it because she figured he would go for something more standard like gold or sterling silver. Then it dawned on her why he chose it: her love necklace was rose gold too.

She heard a snap and nearly jumped out of her skin. She looked over and noticed that Logan was sitting next to her chuckling.

"What?"

"Well, apparently you were staring very intently at that ring."

"Well I love it." she admitted as she grabbed a pancake and some eggs.

"Well, I'm glad."

"I take it you got rose gold because it matches my necklace." She asked as she touched the necklace.

He grinned. "I did."

Veronica grinned as she took a bite of some eggs. "Very good. Tell me, are you going to be cooking every night when we get married?"

Logan gave her a knowing look, "I think you know how to cook."

Veronica laughed, "I know."

They finished eating by 11 o'clock and Veronica cleared the table and loaded the dishwasher for him. Logan headed into his bedroom and came back out with a picture frame.

"Here's something else I want you to have. I actually have a copy of this at my desk at work." He handed it to her.

Veronica broke out into a huge grin. It was a picture of them taken on Logan's birthday on the beach at Trestles and they had just came out of the water a few minutes earlier. Veronica was sporting very beachy waves in her hair. She had a glow about her. Logan had his arms wrapped around her waist and their surfboards were planted in the sand behind him.

"Oh this is the picture that Duncan took isn't it?"

"Yeah I thought it turned out really good." Logan commented.

"It did." Veronica laughed. "Look at me. I look like a surfer girl." She laughed as she remembered Lilly's comments.

"You are a surfer girl." He reminded her as he kissed her. "You're my surfer girl."

* * *

**Seriously, I realize it's probably not the best chapter but just wanted to get this out. I just did a relatively quick proofread so hopefully it wasn't too bad. That Duncan thing on the beach was a last minute add. I was trying to think who would take a picture of them and I chose him. The surfer girl title just came to me a little bit ago. OK so we jump to February next chapter and Valentine's Day. Remember to review please!  
**


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